Out from Under
by Idunnowhy
Summary: Little Bella decided to put off immortality for a few years for a taste of college life-but she never saw Jacob again. Now she's graduating, and it's time to say "I do". But what will she do when Jacob suddenly reappears?
1. Chapter 1

I tipped my head back blissfully, basking in the heat of the Jacksonville sun. Next to me, Renee shifted, then sighed contentedly.

"You know Bella, I know it's selfish, but I'm really glad you decided not to go to Alaska. You wouldn't get winters like this up there."

I bit my lip, guilt and amusement washing through me in equal measure. It had been three and a half years since the day Edward had asked me to marry him. Three and a half years since I realized that even though I loved Edward, I wasn't ready for immortality just yet. Three and a half years since he had smiled, hugged me, expressed his extreme approval of my continued humanity and put the acceptance letter from Dartmouth in my hand.

It had been three and a half years since I broke Jake's heart.

The reminder of Jake stung, a dark spot on my glorious, sunny Christmas vacation, and I firmly pushed it out of my head. I hadn't talked to Jacob Black since I walked out of his room three and a half years ago, and I wasn't going to let the ache in my heart where my best friend used to be ruin what might be the last holiday I got to spend with Renee.

Graduation was sneaking up quickly, and with it came the knowledge that I was going to have to put up or shut up where Edward was concerned. We'd finally told Charlie and Renee about our engagement a year or so ago. I knew Charlie still wasn't thrilled-he'd never forgiven Edward for leaving-but what can you say when your 22 year old daughter comes up to you and tells you she and the man she's been dating for the past 4 years are getting married?

Charlie had begrudgingly given us his blessing. Alice, Esme and Renee were burning up the phone lines between Jacksonville and Forks planning my wedding. The dress had been purchased, the date had been set. We were planning on tying the knot in Forks in October, far enough past graduation that no one would feel rushed. Edward was determined to enjoy my graduation as thoroughly as possible, since it was going to be my first.

Speaking of which…

"So, Bella, have you made any plans for after graduation?"

I smirked.

"You mean aside from emptying out my dorm room, booking the caterer, moving to Illinois and getting married? Nope, no plans, no plans at all."

Renee reached over from the lounge chair she was reclining on, half-heartedly swatting my leg.

"I meant actually getting a job, smart ass."

Oh yeah, employment. I knew as Edward's wife I'd never have to work-would actually have a hard time establishing myself, since we had to move so often-but since I just plain couldn't stand the thought of spending the rest of my very, very long life living on the Cullens' good graces I had decided on a degree in education. No one really expected a teacher to stay in one place too long anyway. Carlisle had agreed to help me forge my papers and references when the time came to move on, as he did his. It was perfect.

"I've started looking around. There are a bunch of schools in Chicago that are desperate for teachers right now. I've dropped resumes off at a few of them, and they're talking about arranging interviews in the spring and summer."

"That's right, you're student teaching this spring, aren't you?"

"Finally."

Renee laughed at the exhausted satisfaction in my voice, hoisting herself out of her seat and raising her glass as she stumbled.

"My Bella, shaping the next generation. May they not be as clumsy as we are. Do you want anything else to drink?"

I shook my head, smiling as she bopped back inside to the steel drum rhythms echoing from her ancient stereo. Renee was going through her Jamaican phase right now, and I relaxed to the soothing beat as I kicked back. Coming to Jacksonville over Christmas had been a great idea. I'd missed Renee, horribly, and sitting in her lawn in the bright December sunshine I couldn't shake the melancholy that came from knowing I was going to miss this next year.

It was weird to realize that I'd be hoisting a glass of O neg rather than eggnog next Christmas.

"Bella…"

Renee's voice drifted over to me, and I frowned at the tone of her voice. Plucking my sunglasses off of my nose, I spun around to where she was standing hesitantly in the doorway to the backyard.

"What is it Mom?"

She walked over to me quickly, glancing furtively over her shoulder.

"There's someone here to see you, but I'm really not sure I should let him in. He looks like trouble."

I started to laugh, but it caught in my throat. The memory of a large, muscled teenager in ratty jeans on a black bike standing in the school parking lot swam through my mind, and my eyes stung for a second as I blinked back tears. It couldn't be…could it?

"Whats'a matter, Bells? Don't tell me you're afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?"

I froze, spinning slowly to stare into the smirking black eyes of the man peering at me over Renee's backyard fence.

"Jacob?"


	2. Chapter 2

My mind fogged over. Jacob, MY Jacob, was here. In Florida. Standing on the other side of Renee's whitewashed back fence with a pair of ragged jeans, a torn black t-shirt and a smirk dancing in his dark eyes. All four of them. Six. Eight. Ten.

Ten?

The next thing I knew, I had a warm hand on the back of my neck and my head between my knees.

"Jeez Bells, I know I'm breathtaking and all, but don't you think this is taking things just a bit too far?"

Oh yeah. I was supposed to breathe, wasn't I? I sucked in a breath, the spots slowly clearing from my eyes as I dragged air into my oxygen deprived lungs. I was pretty sure I was supposed to smack Jacob for being a smart ass, but the urge to inflict physical violence couldn't quite break through the shock of seeing him again…or the suspicious warmth creeping down my spine from the calloused fingers that had stopped pressing and were now gently stroking the nape of my neck.

"Jake?" I repeated stupidly.

He grinned wryly.

"Keep looking at me like that and I might be able to resist the urge to eat you after all."

Jake…eating…werewolf…shit.

Renee.

I glanced over, expecting to see Renee standing there having conniptions, and was shocked by the warm smile on her face.

"Jacob? Jacob Black? _Billy's_ Jacob?"

Jake's grin turned sheepish. He stood up, swiping a hand down the side of his pants before holding it out to my mom.

"Hi Renee. It's good to see you a…oof!"

Jake's polite speech was cut off as Renee threw her arms around him, standing on tiptoe to yank his head down and place a smacking kiss on his cheek.

"Lord, look at you! All grown up!" She let go, stepping back for a better look at Jacob's tall, lanky frame. "Good grief! When you and Bella were running around eating mud pies none of us ever figured you were going to get this tall! Bella, why didn't you tell me Jacob was coming over?"

"Can't tell you what I don't know," I said dryly. The shock of seeing Jake again was starting to wear off, replaced by a slow burn of anger that I knew, _knew_, was going to result in me going off like a bottle rocket. 3 years. 3 years I don't hear a word from him. The last time I talked to Seth, all he'd told me was that Jacob had gone wolf. No one knew if, or when, he was going to come back. Now here he was, standing in Renee's back yard.

What the hell was going on?

"Well, Jacob, why don't you and Bella sit and visit for a bit? I'm sure you have a lot to catch up on. You can fill me in over dinner."

With that, Renee happily bustled off. I found myself hoping she was on her way to grab a gator from the zoo down the street, since that was about the only thing that was going to fill up the 7 foot giant standing in front of me. Then it dawned on me. Renee had just said Jake was staying for dinner.

"You don't mind, do you Bells?"

Good to know some things never changed. He still had the disturbing ability to read my mind. I scowled up at him.

"Sit down, will ya? The sun's in my eyes."

Jake smiled, a soft, cockeyed quirking of the lips that almost-but-not-quite reminded me of the Quileute boy I'd walked with on the beach in La Push. He obligingly sat down at my feet, tucking in his long legs and propping his arm on the edge of my lounger.

"Well, now that I know what I'm having for dinner, what's been going on?"

I arched my eyebrow.

"What's been going on? Seriously? 3 years, I don't hear a word from you, and the best you can say is 'What's been going on?'? I was worried about you, damnit. WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?"


	3. Chapter 3

It's pretty hard to make a grown werewolf sit down and shut up, but my little outburst seemed to have done just that. Jake just sort of…turned off, staring over my shoulder into the Jacksonville horizon with that calm, blank face I'd seen on Sam's face when someone had pushed him too far.

I suppose I should have felt bad about it, but I couldn't. For years I'd swallowed my fear that he wouldn't come back, my anger that he'd forced me to drive this wedge between us and the sheer agony that came from knowing that he was out there, somewhere. That he could have picked up the phone any time and called me, he just hadn't wanted to.

Part of me had tried to say that he'd realized I just wasn't worth it, that I'd finally pushed him too far and he'd decided he didn't want to deal with me anymore. The part of me that knew better told me over and over again that it was my fault he'd left, that if I'd just been able to care about him the way he cared about me he'd still be home, safe with Billy and Sam and the pack, instead of a lone wolf left to wander-or worse, a scared, angry 17 year old boy out there, too proud to come home because I'd been too selfish to let go.

I hadn't cried for him, after that first night. I couldn't do that to Edward, who'd been so patient about the whole thing. The last thing I wanted to do was put him through that again. Truth be told, I always figured that sooner or later Jake would come around and be the little brother I'd always wanted him to be. That I'd eventually be so content with Edward's love that the small part of my heart that knew it needed Jake in my life would shut up, and we could go back to the way things used to be.

As days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, I'd finally realized Jake wasn't coming back. By then, the ache around my heart had gone numb. It wasn't like when Edward had left, that sharp, stabbing, grinding pain that could bring me to my knees. It was like a tubercule, hidden inside me where no one could see. I walled off my pain and went on with my life, perfectly fine unless I thought about him…or looked at my bike, which Billy had thoughtfully had Embry bring out to the Cullens' for me…or saw one of the other boys from La Push. Then the tubercule would burst, flooding my system with the pain of his absence while I shook, swallowing tears until I could wall it off again.

Charlie would ask about him every once in a while, horrified that Billy wasn't doing more to find his missing son. After a while, even he stopped trying.

I thought I'd accepted the fact that I was never going to see him again. Sitting here, with him close enough to touch, the heat from his body blending in with the late afternoon sunshine to warm my skin, I realized how wrong I'd been. For the first time in a long time I felt like all the pieces of my life were finally coming back together, like I'd been a plant hibernating and slowly digging roots that were destined to bloom in the presence of my own personal sun. I felt a weight lift from my shoulders I hadn't even known was there, and I was furious to realize that he still had a place in my heart that not even Edward was ever going to be able to fill.

Time had changed him. Perhaps it was just because I was so used to Edward's frozen, 17 year old perfection, but I hadn't expected Jacob, _my Jacob_, to be any different than he was the day he left me. Stupid, I know. Didn't I see the difference every time I looked in the mirror? 22 year old Bella probably didn't look anything like the 18 year old he'd walked away from either.

He was 21 now. I knew, because for the past three years I'd gone out to First Beach on his birthday hoping this would be the day he'd finally come home. His face was leaner, harder, with none of the boyish roundness he'd retained even after becoming part of the pack. The abnormally large muscles in his arms and shoulders were more prominent, sinewy, as though his body had burned through its fat, leaving only muscle behind. The sweet innocence was gone from his eyes, replaced by the shadows and secrets of someone who'd seen and done terrible things that I couldn't begin to comprehend if my life had been anything resembling normal until now.

His hair was cropped short, shorter even than it had been after the first time he phased. I couldn't help but remember the night in the tent when he'd said he was growing it back out because he thought I liked it that way. My stupid, foolish heart ached to think that maybe this was a tangible sign that he'd finally moved on, the way I'd thought I wanted him to all those years ago.

The boy I knew had finally become a man, and I was starting to wonder if my Jake was still in there somewhere or if that Jake was gone and this cool, silent shell was all that was left. I was beginning to suspect that in his own way, Jake was now as damaged as I had been the summer I'd run to the shores of La Push to get away from the ghosts Edward had left behind.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's note: So, it was brought to my attention that I completely missed the disclaimer on the first few chapters of this story. These characters, their lives and their histories belong entirely to Stephanie Meyer. If they were mine, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn would have been much, much different!**_

I don't know how long we sat there, Jake staring off into the distance at nothing and me staring at Jake. It could have been minutes or hours, both of us lost in our own thoughts. Before I knew it, Renee was calling us both in for dinner and I was no closer than I had been before to finding out what had happened when he left.

Jacob stood up, shook himself like a dog (how much time _had_ he spent as a wolf, anyway?) and reached a hand down to help me up. I just glared up at him. Seriously? He was going to ignore me, then walk into Renee's house, _my mother's house_, and eat dinner like everything was kosher? I don't think so.

He sighed.

"Bells," he raked the hand he'd held out to me over the short, dark waves that covered his head. "I know you want to know what happened after I left, but to be honest, I'm really not sure where to start." The unnatural calm was slowly creeping off his face, replaced with a frustrated desperation and a plea for understanding that stabbed me right in the gut. "Can we talk about this after dinner?"

When he was looking at me like that I would have agreed to just about anything. And how many times had I been the one pleading for time and patience from the gentle giant standing in front of me? I nodded slowly, stretching my hands out for him to pull me up. He grabbed both hands firmly, then pulled, sending me flying off the chair and stumbling into his chest. Laughing, he grabbed my shoulders to steady me.

"Same old Bella."

"Not my fault you're freakishly strong," I grumbled, but I grabbed his hand as we walked inside. Intellectually I knew I probably couldn't do anything about it if he decided to take off again, but something deep inside me demanded I grab hold and hang on. Jake was _here_. For the first time in three and a half years I could see him. I could touch him. He was filling up the empty spaces he'd left behind, and I wasn't letting go until I had some answers.

After that…

I walked into the kitchen and laughed.

"Starting dinner huh?"

Six huge boxes were stacked high on Renee's kitchen table. From the thick aroma of cheese and sauce floating through the air (and the telltale logo on the side of the box) she'd decided cooking was too much trouble and ordered enough pizza to feed an army-or a 21 year old werewolf.

Renee shrugged. "It's too hot to cook. Besides," she sent Jake a blinding smile "I wasn't sure what Jake would want, but everyone likes pizza."

She nodded toward the boxes. "You guys help yourselves. I got a little carried away and ordered enough to feed a pack of wolves. If we're lucky, Bells, you won't have to cook for a while."

Jake snorted beside me, and I knew exactly what he was thinking. If Renee only knew. Those pizzas wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes with the boys in La Push.

Ten minutes later we were happily tucked up in Renee's living room. The only furniture Renee and Phil had in the main room was a pair of recliners, neither one of which would have held Jacob's massive frame, so she and I sat in the chairs while Jake curled himself up on the floor in front of the coffee table.

"So, Jake, what brings you all the way from Forks to Jacksonville?" Renee asked.

My ears perked up as I stole a bite of my pizza, thick, gooey cheese dripping down my chin. Maybe there really was more than one way to skin a cat. God bless my mother and her need to be nosy.

Jake shrugged. "Came out here a couple of years ago. I was looking for a change, and Bella always raved about how nice it was down here."

A couple of years?

"So what are you doing these days?"

"I work at the garage over on the corner of Main and Union."

I snorted. "Figures."

He laughed. "Yeah, well, fixing cars is about all I know how to do."

"Let's see, you'd be about, what, 22, 23 now?" Renee asked, her forehead furrowing in concentration as she tried to reconcile Jake's appearance with his age. "Are you going to school?"

"Sort of." Jake glanced sheepishly over at me as he took a massive bite of his slice. How he managed to actually _find_ the pizza under the inch and a half of toppings was beyond me. "I finished my GED about 3 years ago, but my grades weren't good enough for a scholarship. I've been taking classes here and there at Florida State when I can scrape up the money for tuition."

Renee beamed. "That's nice. And you're living right around here?"

"Yeah, I share an apartment with a couple of roommates just a few blocks from here."

"How's that working out?"

He shrugged again. "It's fine. Quil, Embry and I have known each other since we were in diapers, so it's no big deal."

"Wait," I broke in. "Quil and Embry are here too? Sam actually let them go?"

Jake shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah, they didn't give him a whole lot of choice."

"But," I stopped, looking at Renee. Crap. I couldn't exactly ask Jake how Quil and Embry had managed to convince their alpha werewolf to let them leave La Push, much less travel 3,000 miles to set up shop on the east coast.

"It's okay," he said, immediately recognizing my dilemma. "Quil really needed to get away from the rez for a while, and Sam knew it. Claire…" he paused, and I saw the quick sheen of tears before he looked down, studying his pizza intently. "Bells, Claire died, a couple of years ago."


	5. Chapter 5

I stared at him, numb with horror. Claire had been a pretty little toddler with bouncing curls and an infectious smile the last time I saw her. That hadn't been that long ago. Quil was always taking her around Forks, and even in my worst days after Jake left I had to smile at the joy on both their faces. Anyone could see he was crazy about her, even without the imprint. To lose her…

"What happened?" I whispered.

"Meningitis. It was fast. Too fast. One day she was fine, and a couple hours later she was gone." Jake stopped, dragged in a deep breath. "Quil went a little crazy after that. Pulled into himself, wouldn't talk, wouldn't eat. Sam called me almost every day trying to get me to talk some sense into him. I finally flew out there and dragged his ass back here." He looked over at me, a wry smile quirking the corner of his lips. "I hear a change of scenery does wonders for a broken heart."

"Pardon me for asking, but who's Claire? Was she a friend of yours?"

Shit. I had gotten so wrapped up in the sub-text of Jake's words that I had honestly forgotten Renee was there.

"Claire was the daughter of a friend of ours," Jake said, choosing his words carefully. "She and Quil were…close. She was practically part of his family. She was only 4 when she died, and Quil took it hard."

Renee sucked in her breath. "4 years old? That's horrible."

"It really was," he said softly. "Embry came out a couple of months later. Said he couldn't stand being in Washington without us. Honestly, I think Sam just sent him out here hoping to shut him up."

I grinned, then my grin faded as the full meaning of his words sunk in .

"Wait. Sam knew you were out here?"

Jake squirmed, a guilty look slipping across his face. "Yeah, well, I kinda had to check in with him when I settled in. Let him know I was doing all right. He's been keeping an eye on Dad for me while I've been gone."

I sat back, scowling. All these years. They'd been lying to me for all these years, telling me they hadn't heard from Jake.

"Don't be mad, Bells," he said softly. "I asked them not to say anything."

He unfolded his long legs and stood up, holding his empty plate. I hadn't missed the fact that Jake had managed to kill the better part of a pizza by himself. If he, Quil and Embry were really sharing a house, their grocery bill must be enormous.

"Thank you for dinner," he said, nodding politely to Renee. "I have to open the shop in the morning, so I need to get going."

"Wait, you're leaving?" Panic clawed at the back of my throat. He couldn't leave. Not yet. I'd just gotten him back! We still hadn't talked. I still didn't have any of the answers I realized suddenly I desperately needed.

A gentle smile slipped across his face. "Yeah, 5 o'clock comes earlier than it used to."

Somewhere in the background a phone rang. I saw Renee slip out to answer it, but I wasn't really paying attention.

"Can't you stay for a little longer?" I asked, hoping my desperation wasn't as obvious as I thought it was. "It's been so long…"

Jake glanced at the clock again, then back at me. His eyes softened, and he took a step closer.

"I suppose I could…"

"Bella?"

We both glanced over to where Renee was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, one hand cupped around the mouthpiece of the cordless handset.

"Honey, Edward's on the phone."

Damn it. I felt Jacob stiffen beside me and cursed Edward's timing. I glanced up at him pleadingly, but his face was cold as ice as he stepped back.

"Tell the l-_Edward _I said hello," he said dryly, knowing full well Edward could hear every word he said. "It was good seeing you Bells."

With a quick smile for Renee he walked into the kitchen, set his plate in the sink and walked out the door and out of my life.

Again.


	6. Chapter 6

The echo of the door slamming behind Jake's angry back echoed through the house. I pretended not to notice as Renee winced in sympathy, grabbing the phone out of her hand and heading toward the guest room I called home.

"Hey."

"Bella?" Edward's voice, as always, was cool and cultured. "What was Jacob Black doing in Renee's living room?"

"I don't know. He just…showed up." Suddenly I stopped, braking as if I had slammed into a brick wall and almost falling over before I spun back around. "Wait a minute. How did you know we were in the living room?"

"Because I'm standing right across the street."

I flew to the picture window, pulling the curtains to one side and peering eagerly into the night. Under the light of the street lamp on the other end of Renee's little cul de sac, dressed all in black and leaning casually against the side of Alice's yellow Porsche, Edward looked like a model from GQ. He was so effortlessly beautiful that even after 4 long years together, the sight of him could still take my breath away. Grinning, I turned off the phone, raced out the door and threw myself into his arms.

"Edward! What are you doing here? I thought you were in Forks?"

I'm pretty sure I was smiling wide enough to crack my face, so it took me a minute to realize that Edward wasn't smiling back.

"Alice was worried. She said she'd completely lost track of your future, and since we didn't know there were any werewolves in Jacksonville I flew out to make sure you were okay."

The censure in his voice made me flinch. He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Why didn't you tell me, Bella?"

"Tell you what?" I asked, confused.

"Tell me that you were going to be seeing Jacob while you were here. Why did you try and keep it a secret? You had to have known that the minute Alice realized she couldn't see you…"

He trailed off, staring at my face. I'm pretty sure I was sputtering, but I wasn't quite sure what to say. Did he think I'd planned this whole thing? That Jacob being here was anything other than an amazing coincidence?

"What? No! You can't honestly believe…I mean, why would you even think…Do you think that if I'd known Jake was here I would have…" I trailed off, filled with horror at what I had almost said.

"Let another minute go by without hopping on a plane to Jacksonville?" Edward asked wryly. "Wasn't that _exactly_ what you did with this Christmas vacation?"

He was right. If I had known Jake was trying to make it on his own in Jacksonville I would have been on a plane in a heartbeat. Still…

"That's not fair! I invited you to come with me. I _begged _you to come with me! You said no, that you wanted me to have this time alone with Renee."

"Yes, well, had I realized you weren't actually going to _be_ alone I wouldn't have been so quick to refuse." The anger was gone from his voice, replaced with a dry exasperation as he took my hands. "You really had no idea that he would be here when you planned this trip?"

"You have to believe me, I had no clue that Jacob was anywhere near here. Quil or Embry either. I…" I trailed off, letting my forehead land on his shoulder with a _thud_. Me and my big mouth. However innocent, the guys were going to kill me for telling Edward they were all here.

"It's okay, Bella. I assumed if he was here, he wasn't alone." Edward smirked, then sighed. "Honestly, part of me is very glad he's had friends here with him the past few years."

"Really?"

He smiled, rubbing the back of his neck. "I know you've been worried about him. Despite my nearly incoherent joy at the peace and quiet his absence has brought to our lives, I'm glad he hasn't been on his own, for his sake, because his well being makes you happy, that he's had friends…"

Edward trailed off, and I smiled weakly. Why did he have to be so perfect? Even though I knew he'd been glad to see Jacob leave, even though he couldn't even say it straight out without stumbling over it, he still wanted Jake well because he knew that Jacob's happiness made me happy. How lucky could I possibly get? And I had just been complaining, even if it was only in my head, that he had lousy timing.

December is still the middle of winter, even in Jacksonville. A cool breeze drifted down the street, making me shiver. Edward, of course, immediately noticed. Pulling off his leather jacket, he tucked me into it before slinging his arm over my shoulder and leading me back toward the house. I smiled, snuggling deeper into both his arm and his side. Next year I would have to find another excuse to cuddle into him in the night (not that he, himself, did a whole lot to warm me up, but the jacket was a vast improvement over the short sleeves I'd been wearing earlier), but for right now it was just nice to be with him.

"So, how long are you staying?" I asked.

He grimaced, opening Renee's door and ushering me into the warm kitchen.

"Actually, now that I know you're alive and well I need to get back to Forks."

"What? Why?" I turned to look at him. I knew my voice had been sharper than I meant it to be, but I couldn't help it. He just got here, and he was already telling me he had to leave. That seemed to be becoming a trend today, and I didn't like it.


	7. Chapter 7

Edward smiled, brushing a stray lock of hair out of my face. I wasn't sure if he was mocking my mini-temper tantrum (Lord knew he'd been on the receiving end of enough of them to know this one didn't even register on the Richter scale) or if he was smiling to cover up his own dismay at having to leave. He'd started doing that in the last year or so-pasting a smile on his face when he didn't like what was going on instead of that perfect blankness I despised. It really wasn't an improvement, but it did make it harder to tell what he was thinking.

"There's nothing to worry about. Jasper and Alice have a…_situation_ which requires my assistance. I…left them in the lurch, is that how you say it?"

I nodded.

"I left them in the lurch when I came out here to see you."

"Is everything okay?"

"Of course," he answered smoothly, kissing me on the forehead. "We'll take care of it, and I'll rejoin you in plenty of time for the spring semester."

I frowned, knowing he was hiding something from me but not sure what to do about it. One the one hand, I really hated it when he kept things from me. On the other, if he really was just helping out Jasper and Alice and Alice hadn't told me about it already, there was a very good chance it was none of my business.

"Do you have to leave tonight?" I asked plaintively. "Couldn't you wait until tomorrow?"

He smiled again, a soft turn at the corner of his perfect lips that never reached his eyes.

"I'm afraid not. In this situation, every second counts."

"And you _really_ can't tell me what's going on?"

"I'm afraid not."

I sighed. Fine. He said he'd have it straightened out by the time we got back to school. Maybe I could get it out of him then.

"All right." I shrugged off his jacket, taking a moment to inhale the sweet, smooth scent of the leather before handing it back. "I guess I'll see you in a couple of weeks."

He reached out, staring at me seriously as he draped his jacket over his arm.

"Bella, please be careful while I'm gone. I know you once considered Jacob a friend, but…"

I held my hand up.

"Don't even go there, Edward. You know as well as I do that Jacob would never hurt me."

"Three years ago, maybe," he agreed seriously. "But you haven't seen him in a long time, and you have no idea what changes time may have brought. Werewolves are dangerous, Bella. Never, ever forget that."

"Right, because hanging around with vampires has always been so good for my health."

Pain flickered in his eyes, and I immediately regretted my hasty tongue. It didn't seem to matter that it had been years since any vampires had tried to turn me into fast food because of my association with the Cullens. Edward took the threat to my life very, very seriously. If I had any complaints about the past few years, it was that I'd been _too_ cozened-but then, after spending the better part of two years terrified I wasn't going to live long enough to go to my first frat party, much less get drunk and do something stupid in a room full of college boys, who was I to complain?

"I only meant that Jacob has never been a danger to me, and whatever else may have changed I know he hasn't changed that much."

Edward sighed again, reaching out to pull me close and place a gentle, chaste kiss on my lips.

"Just be careful, Bella, please. I don't know what I'd do without you."

He opened the front door to Renee's house, placing a gentle kiss on my lips before closing the door behind him I rushed into the living room, pulling back the curtains again to watch him climb into his car and roar away.

"Bella, was that Edward?"

I jumped, lifting my head to see Renee sitting on a recliner, the latest issue of "Elle" face down in her lap as she looked at me with concern. I had been in such a hurry to see Edward leave that I hadn't even realized she was there.

"Yeah, he…ah…was in the neighborhood and wanted to say hi?"

Her eyebrows soared, and I squirmed at the maternal look on her face.

"Wasn't he spending his vacation with his family in Forks?"

"Yeah." I sighed. She obviously wasn't going to buy the whole 'in the neighborhood' excuse. As I tried to think of something to tell her other than "Oh, by the way mom, my almost-sister-in-law is a psychic vampire who saw my future disappear and Edward came out here thinking I was dead" a knowing look came into her eyes.

"Does this have anything to do with Jacob suddenly showing up on my doorstep?"

"Kind of," I admitted sheepishly, walking over and flopping into the other chair. "He came out because Jake was here, but he's in the middle of something with Alice and Jasper and had to get back."

She smiled slightly. I knew she thought Edward had shown up because he was jealous, but it was the closest thing to the truth I could give her without trying to explain that my best friend (former best friend?) was a werewolf who blocked Alice's psychic visions, or that it wasn't the first time Jake had made my future disappear. Or even the first time Edward had thought I was dead because of it.

What did that say about my life?

"It was good to see Jacob again. I wish I'd known he was here. Starting over's always hard. As long as I've known the Blacks, the least I could have done was make him feel welcome." She frowned. "I wonder why neither Charlie or Billy called to tell me he was here. At the very least I could have kicked some business his way, helped keep him in a job."

If he was trying to hide out from me the last thing Jake would have done was have someone tell Renee he was here. Since I didn't want to say it, however, I just shrugged.

"Who knows why men do the things they do?" I quipped lightly, walking over to give her a hug. "I'm heading to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

"Night honey," she said, squeezing me tightly. "I'm so glad you're here."

I closed my eyes, guilt washing through me. This trip had hammered home just how much Renee was going to miss me when I "disappeared" next year. Maybe after I gained control I could find a way to come back. And there was always email. Maybe I could find a way to not have to completely abandon her after all.

"Good night mom," I murmured, placing a kiss on her forehead and heading for the shower and the peaceful oblivion of sleep.

As tired as I was, as emotionally draining as the day had been, I thought I'd drop straight off that night. I should have known better. Hours passed as I laid in bed, staring at the whirling ceiling fan and trying to come to grips with everything that had happened today.

Jacob was alive, well and living just a few blocks from Renee's house. Sam, Billy and the pack had known, and they hadn't said anything. I had to wonder if Billy had said something to Charlie, and that's why he finally quit looking for Jake. I knew he didn't approve of everything that had happened between us all those years ago. Knowing I was with Edward, and that Jake and I had parted on bad terms, he probably thought he was doing us both a favor by keeping quiet. He couldn't possibly have known how wracked with guilt I had been over what had happened, or that I'd lain awake at night for years wondering where Jake was and what he was doing.

If he was thinking of me the way I was thinking of him.

Right before I drifted off to sleep, a small smile slipped across my face. Didn't Renee say her car was past due for a tune-up?


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning dawned bright and sunny. As I snuggled deeper into the downy white comforter Renee had used in her guestroom, I blinked my eyes open and welcomed the Jacksonville sunshine. The day was as brilliant as my mood, and the feeling of satisfaction was so strange and unfamiliar that it took me a few minutes to remember what brought on all this goodwill. Then I remembered.

I was going to see Jake today.

My smile grew into a full-fledged grin and I sprang out of bed. All but skipping across the room, I threw open the small wardrobe Renee had provided and surveyed my options. Pulling tops and bottoms off the shelves and hangers (and discarding them almost as fast) I had to laugh. Once upon a time I would have grabbed the first t-shirt and semi-clean pair of jeans I could find and called it a day. Alice and 3 years among the rich and elite at Dartmouth had been a terrible influence.

After 15 minutes of agonizing I finally settled on a pretty purple eyelet top Alice had bought me and my favorite pair of cut-offs. Casual enough for a garage, trendy enough (and showing just enough of my newly-tanned legs) to put just a little bit of bounce in my step. A quick brush through the hair, a pair of well-worn flip flops and a spritz of perfume and I was ready to go.

Scurrying into the kitchen, I surprised Renee with a quick kiss on the cheek before going to the refrigerator and pulling out the fixings for French toast.

"Well!" She laughed, shaking her head as I all but danced around the kitchen. "You're certainly in a good mood today. What are you up to?"

Yep, there it was. One of the biggest perks of immortality (in my mind anyway) was going to be the inability to blush. Cheeks burning, I kept my eyes glued to the French toast mix and my voice deliberately casual.

"It's a nice day. I'm itching to get out of the house and go look around Jacksonville for a while."

Renee scrunched up her brow thoughtfully. "Well, I have to work until about 5, but I can take you out after that if you want. Or you could just drop me off at work and take my car."

When Phil wasn't on the road Renee answered phones for his publicist downtown. It was an arrangement that worked for both of them, since Allison (the publicist) worked almost exclusively with the team anyway and didn't really need the extra set of hands when they were out of town. It gave Renee an income and a sense of purpose while still hanging on to the freedom to travel with Phil whenever she wanted. I'd been counting on her having to work that day, just like I'd counted on her being too polite to make me sit around the house while she was gone.

"Oh wait," she said with a frown. My heart sank. "The car's seriously overdue for a tune-up and an oil change. I'm afraid to have you drive it around until I get it looked at. Maybe you should wait for me after all."

She brightened. "Didn't Jacob say his shop was right on the corner of Main and Union?"

Victory.

"I think so," I said, deliberately not looking her way.

"That's not too far from the office. Would you mind taking me to work and then dropping the car off with Jacob? There's a shopping center right near there you could wander around for a bit, and if they can get it right in it shouldn't take more than an hour or two. Then you'd have the rest of the day to do whatever."

"What time are you off?" I asked, trying to look like I was worried about not having time to do everything I wanted to do if I had to hit the shop first. The simple truth was, last night seemed like a dream in the harsh light of day. The only thing on my agenda was seeing Jake so I could believe the previous day hadn't been just another moment dreamed up by my overactive imagination and a guilty conscience.

Renee waved her hand and poo-poo'd. "Don't worry about that. I'll catch a ride with Allison to the field to watch the afternoon practice, then come home with Phil. You go ahead and stay out as long as you like."

This was working out better than I'd hoped. Without having to keep Renee's schedule I could talk Jake into having dinner with me when he got off. We had three years' worth of news to catch up on, and I desperately wanted to know what he'd done when he'd left Forks. More importantly, I wanted to try and rebuild some of the bridges I'd burned when I'd walked away from Jake's broken and mangled body that last horrible day at Billy's house. I knew it was selfish, but now that I knew he was alive and well I wasn't willing to go back to Dartmouth until I knew we could be friends again.

I barely tasted breakfast, bolting my French toast and racing down the hall to brush my teeth. Renee laughed, teasing me about being in too big a hurry to get out from under her thumb, but she obligingly hurried through her meal. Twenty minutes later I'd dropped her off at Allison's office and was carefully following the map she'd drawn in painstaking detail to get to the corner of Main and Union. Completely wrapped up in not getting lost, I didn't see the garage until I was right on top of it.

Slamming on the brakes, I whipped into the parking lot and looked up at the sign on the side of the building.

Wolfpack Auto Repairs, Inc.

Wolfpack Auto Repairs. It was too ironic to be a coincidence. While the prospect took my breath away, even though he was WAY too young to be running his own business, somehow I just knew. This had to be Jake's place.

I don't know why I was surprised. If I'd been thinking about it, I'd have realized that Jake would never be happy working for somebody else. It made what I was about to do seem so much harder though. Climbing out of the car I took a deep breath, straightened my purse on my shoulder and prepared to beard the werewolf in his den.


	9. Chapter 9

Have you ever walked into the lion cage at the zoo? Multiply the butterflies you'd feel walking into that cage by about a thousand, toss in a healthy dose of indigestion from a Tom Wahl's veggie burger and you'll understand just how I felt standing outside the front door of Wolfpack Auto Repairs. Incorporated. God, Jake was incorporated. This was a horrible idea. I should just get back in the car, stop by a Jiffy Lube and pretend this moment of insanity never happened.

"Bella?"

Embry's voice stopped me in my tracks as I was tearing back toward the car, which was probably a good thing since the conscious decision to move had never actually made it to my brain. Moments like that tended to end with me sporting a bloody nose and at least one broken limb. Still, it was Embry. Given the way things had ended with me and Jake, and the fact that I was still engaged to marry a Cullen, I wasn't 100% certain his welcome wouldn't end with him tearing my head off.

Pasting a weak smile on my face, I slowly turned around.

"Hey?"

It was more of a question than a welcome, but somehow it was enough. Embry whooped loudly, throwing the greasy towel in his hands into the air before tearing across the parking lot. Before I could say a word he had scooped me up in his arms and pulled me in for a loud, sloppy kiss.

"Ugh," I laughed, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. "It's nice to see you too."

Embry grinned, spinning me around. "Nice? Three years, and nice is the best you can do? I'm hurt. Where's the love? Where's the appreciation?"

I knew he was joking, but I couldn't help but feel a stab of guilt. He was right. The last time I'd seen Embry he had been risking his life to keep me safe from Victoria and the evil army of undead noobs she was bringing with her. I'd been so caught up in my own personal drama, I'd never taken the time to thank him. Piles of appreciation seemed like the least I could do.

Tears stung the back of my eyes as I threw my arms around him and held on for dear life.

"Now that's more like it," Embry said. I could hear the laughter in his voice.

"Yeah, if you've suddenly developed the desperate desire to become a throw rug." The amused voice behind him could only belong to Quil. "The boss man's gonna kick your ass for kissing his girl in the parking lot, and I'm pretty sure you get double demerits for making her cry."

Embry immediately yanked me off of his shoulder, holding me at arm's length with a look of horror usually reserved for new fathers, fragrant diapers and ticking time bombs. My feet were dangling at least two feet off the concrete.

"Jeez, Bella, I'm sorry. I didn't make you cry, did I? Jake's gonna kill me if I made you cry, so can you just sniffle it up until I can sneak you inside and find a bathroom or something?"

He looked so desperate I couldn't hold in a wet, snuffly laugh that didn't do anything to convince him I wasn't going to break into tears at any moment.

"I'm fine, Embry. I'm just happy to see you."

I hadn't realized it until then, but I really was happy to see him. The years had been good to him. In fact, if it wasn't for the faint laugh lines around his eyes and the deep timbre of his voice, I would have sworn he hadn't changed a bit.

Quil was a different story. He was smiling, a sweet, hesitant smile, but it looked like it hadn't been used in a while and didn't quite reach his eyes. Grief had ravaged his face, and while he was still muscular his Wolfpack jumper hung off his lanky frame. Dark shadows sweeping low under both his eyes attested to years of sleepless nights. His hair was lank, limp and just short enough that his coat wouldn't be a problem when he phased.

He looked like hell, and I felt my heart break all over again. Life-or rather, Claire's death-had kicked the stuffing out of the indestructible teenager I'd known back in Forks, and a soft voice whispered in my ear that despite the pulse pounding at the base of his throat Quil had one foot in the grave right along with her.

It was only a matter of time.

"Hey Quil," I said softly.

"Hey Bella," he replied, just as softly, then laughed. It wasn't a happy sound. More like the cacophonous shriek of a trumpet that had been left sitting on the mantle too long. "I can tell by the look on your face that Jake already filled you in, so let's skip the small talk, shall we? Yes, it was a tragedy. Yes, I'm fine. No, there's nothing you can do to help. Yes, I'll pass your condolences on to Claire's family next time I see them."

He said the words by rote, and I flinched as I realized just how many times he must have had to answer those exact same questions over the past few years. I couldn't think what to say to him. What do you say to someone who had part of their soul ripped out? It was a feeling I remembered all too well, and no one knew better than I did that there was absolutely nothing you could say that was going to make that any better. I settled for walking over and wrapping my arms around him.

He hesitated for a second, his hands hovering over my back, before exhaling in a whoosh and squeezing me back. I could feel a shudder run down his spine, just the barest hint of the turmoil that had to be dancing behind those deep brown eyes, and I held on a little tighter. A faint hint of pain stabbed at me as I remembered how many times I had held on to Jacob, just like this, after Edward left. Jacob had been my anchor back then, and I would have bet my entire annual salary that he was holding on to Quil just as tightly.

As Quil's warm arms tightened around me just a little further, I couldn't help but wonder who had held on to Jacob these past few years. Had he had friends or lovers along the way to hold him close, sharing their body heat so that, for just a few minutes, the world didn't feel so cold? Or had he been alone, forced to bungle through on his own because this stupid competition between him and Edward had driven him away from the only family he'd ever known? I realized yet again just how much trouble my selfish decisions had caused Jake, and I sighed as I laid my head against Quil's broad chest.

"Hey buddy, you gonna stand there snuggling your girl all day or you gonna fix my car sometime before hell freezes over?"

Untangling myself, I looked behind Quil to see a heavyset, balding man wearing a Florida State Team baseball cap (Phil's team) glaring at Quil and I, his mustache twitching furiously. I felt Quil stiffen at the customer's angry words, but Embry quickly stepped in before Quil had time to blow his top.

"We'll get back to your car in just a second, Mr. Shepherd. Right now, there's someone I'd like you to meet." He led Mr. Shepherd over to where we were standing. "Bella, I'd like you to meet Horatio Shepherd. He and Bessie are regulars around here. Mr. Shepherd, this is Bella Swan."

I was about to ask Embry who Bessie was, but before I got the chance Mr. Shepherd had grabbed my hand and was pumping my arm like a steam engine.

"Bella Swan! As I live and breathe. You know, I saw your step-daddy play just the other night. Was sitting right in the top row next to Algernon, helping him dig sunflower seeds out from under the seats-oh, you probably haven't had a chance to meet Algernon yet, you just getting back here and all. He's Florida State's official team seagull. Always somewhere up at the field. Anyway, so I'm talking to Algernon, and…"

His play-by-play rehashing of the previous night's game, which I had happily watched all of about five minutes of from the comfort of Renee's recliner and their spacious, 42" flatscreen, went on…and on…and on. At some point he wrapped his arm around my shoulder, guiding me toward the waiting area and the massive building I had been trying so hard to avoid not ten minutes earlier while he rambled on about RBIs, batting averages and Algernon's favorite fried snack (apparently the bird went apeshit over a bag of Funions). I glanced back desperately at Quil and Embry, but they were both smirking after me. Embry even waved, wiggling his fingers before blowing me a kiss and mouthing, "Toodles."

My brows snapped together. It was a setup. They had needed something-or rather, someone-to distract their irritated customer before he could take a jab at Quil, and as the stepdaughter of a member of his favorite minor-league team I had fallen right into their trap. They knew, damn it. They'd known what he was going to do the minute they led him over to me. As soon as I extricated myself from the sweet, loquacious and slightly smelly Mr. Shepherd I was going to kill them both.


	10. Chapter 10

Horatio (he insisted I call him by his first name) gallantly held the door open for me, then had to step quickly to catch me as I tripped over a zooming toddler and did a swan dive (no pun intended) for the floor. My eyes widened as I straightened up and got my first look at Wolfpack Auto Repairs, Inc.

There were people _everywhere._

Against the far wall a group of teenagers sat on what was obviously a homemade bench, caught in that awkward stage between childhood and adults as they listened to Tyra Banks and passed around a huge box of Cracker Jacks. In the middle of the room about a dozen people sat in rows of hard plastic chairs, flipping through magazines and talking on cell phones. The soft snore coming from somewhere in the middle of the group told me at least one of them had decided to use this break from the blistering afternoon heat to catch a siesta.

I bit down on a smile when I saw the little boy I had stumbled over earlier racing to the play area near the reception desk. Someone-I had a pretty good idea who-had built a wooden toy chest and filled it to overflowing with dolls, stuffed animals and action figures of all shapes and sizes. A pair of little girls fought over whose turn it was to play with a life-sized grey wolf in the corner while a small collection of pre-schoolers happily drove Thomas and his Friends across the giant wooden train table.

Looking around, I realized that the floors had been covered with textured tiles in a deep cocoa, and rather than the pale, institutional paint I had been expecting someone had created a forest mural across all of the interior walls. It was enchanting, and very, very Jake.

"Hello? Bella? Are you in there?"

I flushed, realizing I hadn't heard a word Horatio had said since we stepped inside.

"It's all right, I had about the same reaction the first time I came in after he'd fixed the place up." Horatio chuckled, patting me on the shoulder as he looked around the room with fatherly pride. "Boy's done something special here, that's for sure. You known Jacob long?"

"Since we were kids," I said with a smile.

"He's a good boy. I was afraid when old Smitty died that this place was going to die with it. Didn't figure the kid would be able to handle it on his own, but he's done all right." He paused, glanced over his shoulder, then turned back to me and started whispering furiously.

"Listen, I know I ain't got no right to ask, but…" he swallowed nervously, "…you gonna be coming around often?"

"I…I'm not sure. I mean, I'm not going to be in town very long. Why?"

He reached up, scooping his hat off his head and holding it out.

"It's just…well, do you think you might be able to get this signed for me? You can leave it with Jake, he knows where to find me."

Ugh. That wasn't what I had been expecting. I eyed the hat dubiously, taking in the dark band around the brim and the droplets of sweat slowly rolling onto the floor. If I could have found a good reason to refuse him I would have, but since the cool lobby seemed to have frozen my ability to come up with a creative excuse I just pasted a weak smile on my face and swore to make the best of it.

"Sure," I said, reaching out with two fingers to take the sweat-coated cap. It was going in the washing machine the minute I got home.

"Thanks," he said, his florid face breaking into a brilliant smile.

"Mr. Stephens? I think Bessie's just about ready to rock."

For the second time that day my stomach firmly lodged itself in my throat. The owner of the voice was standing behind us, a pair of keys in her hand and a warm smile on her face. She was about 18 or 19, and dressed in a casual baby-doll tee with "Florida State" printed across the front, a pair of khaki cargo pants and Skechers that had obviously seen better days she could have been any college student working over her Christmas break-until you got a look at her face.

She didn't look like anyone that would belong in a garage. Human or not, Rosalie would have hated her. From her sun-kissed skin with its light smatter of freckles to her shocking blue eyes and rosebud mouth to the cascade of thick, blonde curls that tumbled down to her tiny waist, she was the prom queen, Miss America and the girl next door all rolled into one. The sight of her sent my earlier sense of well-being rushing away on a tidal wave of insecurity.

"Andy m'girl, I knew you could get 'er going again." Horatio chortled with glee, reaching out to pluck the keys out of her hand. "How much do I owe you?"

"We'll put it on your tab and send out a bill at the end of the month, just like we always do," the girl said with a smile. "I just need you to come up and sign the usual paperwork and you guys will be good to go."

I heard something crinkle as she guided him up to the front desk. Glancing down, I bit back a chuckle at the sight of the plastic grocery bag she'd pushed into my hand. Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth (at least, not when I was desperate) I stuffed the dripping hat inside and tightly tied the handles together before following them up to the front. I'd get Renee's car signed in, then I'd go find Jake.


	11. Chapter 11

As it turned out, I didn't have to wait very long. Before I could even cross the room, Jake strode through a pair of swinging doors carefully concealed behind the reception desk. He thumped Horatio on the arm before casually wrapping an arm around Andy's shoulders.

"She gave us a run for our money this time Shep," he laughed, giving Andy an affectionate squeeze. "I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to keep resuscitating that old heap of yours."

"Aw, knew you'd get her running Jake. You always do." Horatio turned to me, grinning. "Got magic in his hands, this one does."

He had no idea. I smiled good-naturedly, instinctively turning to Jacob to share the joke.

His expression made my blood run cold. The warm welcome I had received from Quil and Embry was nowhere to be found in the hard lines of his hostile face. His brows snapped together, anger turning his chocolate stare black as he glared at me. My stomach churned as his hand tightened on Andy's shoulder, pulling her closer as if he could use her to physically will me away.

"Bella."

His voice was carefully neutral, but Andy's face blanched in surprise.

"Bella? _You're_ Bella?"

"In the flesh," I quipped.

I thought I heard Jake mutter "For the moment" under his breath, but it was so soft I couldn't be sure it wasn't just my all-too-human ears playing tricks on me. Andy looked back and forth between Jake and I, indecision flickering across her face before she stretched up to kiss Jake on the cheek and walked to the reception desk. Horatio scurried after her.

The noisy room seemed to fade in the background as Jacob and I stared at each other, the unexpected tension between us so thick you could have cut it with a knife. Jake was the first to break the silence.

"What are you doing here, Bells?"

There was no anger in his voice, despite the look on his face. He sounded worn and tired, like he had fought the good fight and now wanted to be left alone to lick his wounds and try and pick the pieces out of the rubble that had been left behind. Was there no end to the sins I'd committed against this man?

"I…Renee's car needs a tune-up and an oil change. She wanted me to bring it to you."

I hadn't meant to say that. Holy God, I hadn't meant to say that. I watched Jake's head jerk back like he'd been slapped, but his voice was cool when he spoke.

"I'll tell Quil. He'll get right on it. Should take about an hour, then you can be on your way."

He turned and started walking back behind the desk. I realized everyone in the room was staring at us. I didn't care. I knew if I let Jake walk away this time I was never going to get another chance to make things right. I raced after him, grabbing his wrist and pulling him back around.

"I need to talk to you." Crap. I was usually good with words. My professors constantly lauded my writing skills. Why, then, was it so hard to just tell Jake I came to see him?

"There's nothing left to talk about, Bella," Jake said softly. "I think we said everything we needed to say 3 years ago."

"Then why did you come to Renee's?" I snapped, letting go of his arm. "Why let me know you were here at all?"

"Because…!" Jake stopped, scowling, glancing around at the bright eyes watching us with rabid interest. "This isn't the place for this. Andy, I'm taking a break. Tell anyone who needs to know that I'll be back later."

He grabbed my hand, pulling me out of the reception area and into the main mechanic's bay. I could feel curious eyes boring into my back as I scurried to keep up. My own eyes were glued to the floor as I tried desperately not to trip over anything.

He led me through the giant warehouse, up a flight of stairs and into a small, sparsely furnished office providing a front row seat to the activity going on below. As soon as the door closed behind us Jake dropped my hand, walking over to close the blinds on the windows overlooking the bay.

I had no idea what I was going to say to him, so I took advantage of the brief reprieve to look around what was obviously his personal space. He'd come a long way from the metal garage he'd built behind Billy's house in La Push. A huge desk sat on the far side of the room, its surface empty except for a closed laptop and a scribbled on desk calendar. The trio of chairs sitting in front of the desk were the same supple brown leather as the desk chair behind it, and I couldn't resist running my fingers over the surface to see if it was as soft as it appeared.

A lone bookshelf occupied the far wall, the bottom shelves crammed with books on car repair and engine maintenance, but it was the two top shelves filled with carefully framed photographs that drew me like a moth to the flame. A picture of him, Quil and Embry, arms slung over each other's shoulders as they stood in front of the shop, took center stage, flanked by photos of him with an older man I didn't recognize, another of him, the man and a woman and another of the three of them with Andy. I felt a lump in my throat as I stared at a picture of him standing with his arms around Andy on what was obviously her graduation day and another of the two of them outside somewhere, her sitting on his shoulders, arms raised in victory, brilliant smiles on both of their faces.

I was happy he'd finally moved on. Really.

I started to turn away when another photo caught my eye. It had been tucked back into a shadowy corner, and I would have missed it if the light hadn't picked that precise moment to glint off the silver frame. Reaching out, I picked it up and lightly traced my fingers over the cool surface of the glass. I remembered this photo. Jake had his arm wrapped firmly around my shoulders, his cheek resting on my hair as we smiled at the camera. Embry had taken it at the last bonfire I'd gone to, before the frantic trip to Italy that had brought Edward back into my life.

The same picture sat on the desk shelf back in my dorm.

A hand suddenly appeared, plucking the photo out of my numbed fingers.

"You wanted to talk?" Jake said gruffly, reaching around me to set the picture back on the shelf. "Talk."


	12. Chapter 12

_**Author's Note: A huge thank-you to everyone who's read, reviewed and stuck with me since this story began. I know things were a little stiff when we got started. I hadn't written fiction in a long, long time! Things are starting to roll now though, and to be honest I'm as anxious to find out what's going to happen to Bella and Jake as you are! **_

If you had asked me this morning what I wanted to say to Jake the words would have bubbled over, but now that the moment was here my mind was curiously blank. I heard the gentle whoosh of the air conditioning, felt the heat of his warm body pressed against my back, and asked the first question that popped into my mind.

"Why did you leave?"

A soft, choking gasp slipped out of Jake's throat. Pain and disbelief were etched into his face as he stepped back, turning away from me to circle his desk and throw himself into the huge leather chair.

"If you really have to ask why I left, Bells, you didn't know me half as well as I thought you did."

Of course I knew why he left. I'd kissed him, dragged him into a fight that had almost cost him his life, told him I loved him, and then left him broken and beaten, almost in the same breath. I sighed, walking over and perching on the corner of the desk.

"All right, I'll give you that. After everything that happened…that day, I think I'd have wanted to get away from me too." That earned me a wry smile, and I grabbed on to that with both hands as I forged ahead. "But why did you stay gone so long? I waited and waited, but you never came back."

The smile disappeared, replace by a dry smirk that barely touched the corners of his lips.

"Ah, but you didn't wait, did you? You went straight from my arms to his."

"It wasn't like that."

"It was EXACTLY like that!"

The slam of his hand on his desk sent me flying into the air.

"You told me you loved me, but you didn't love me enough to stay with me. Then you went running straight back to him. You didn't come. You didn't call. I waited WEEKS for you to show up, but you were so wrapped up in him that you couldn't be bothered. Tell me, Bella, did you miss me even a little? Did you worry about me? Or were you so happy to have your bloodsucker alive and in one piece that you just didn't care?"

Shock turned my knees to jelly, and I gently eased back down onto the ledge of the desk.

"Was that what you thought? That I didn't care?" Disbelief echoed through my voice. "I stayed away because I thought that was what you wanted. Damn it, it was my fault! I was the one Victoria wanted. I was the one that made Edward stay, and I was the one that was selfish enough to kiss you knowing it wouldn't make a difference one way or the other. It was MY FAULT."

Tears dripped slowly and steadily down my cheeks as I stared at him, begging him to understand.

"I was so ashamed, so afraid I was going to hurt you more, but Jacob…" I carefully slipped my hand across the desk, laying my fingers gently on the back of his shaking hands, "There hasn't been a day in the last 3 and a half years that I haven't thought about you, wondering where you were and if you were all right."

Silence hung over our heads as we sat, frozen under the weight of our admissions. Suddenly Jacob jerked forward, jumping over the desk and yanking me into his arms.

"God I've missed you," he whispered, his voice thick with the same tears that were slowly but surely soaking their way through the front of his shirt.

"M-m-m-me too," I stammered, burying my face in his chest. There it was. The peace, the feeling of safety and warmth I only ever found with Jacob. How had I lived without this for so long?

"I'm sorry, Bells," he said, pulling me closer. "I was so angry, so sure that I'd completely ruined everything, that I did exactly what I thought I'd already done."

I really didn't want to move right then, but oxygen was starting to become an issue. I gently laid a hand on his chest and pushed away. He loosened his arms immediately, his eyes darkening with hurt, and I smiled and shifted my hand from his chest to his cheek.

"Small, weak, puny human, remember? Still need to breathe."

He smirked, the shadows clearing from his eyes. His happiness reverberated all the way down to my toes, filling me with warmth as I basked in the glow.

"You are pretty puny. Couldn't you be bothered to hit the gym sometime in the last 3 years?"

My fist connected with his shoulder, and he flinched even though I knew damn well he'd barely felt it. For a golden moment it felt as if everything in my world was exactly as it should be. Then the office door cracked open and Andy poked her head in. Her eyes widened at the sight of us standing there in each other's arms.

"Sorry," she squeaked, her cheeks flushing a deep red. "Mr. Solomon's on line 1, wants to know if you're interested in some used parts he just brought down from New York."

"Tell him I'll call him back," Jake said, tightening his arms around me when I would have pulled away. Andy nodded, ducking back out as quickly as she'd come in.

"I'm sorry," I babbled, "I didn't mean to…I mean, I didn't want to…"

Jake frowned.

"Bells, what are you talking about?"

"I just…I…I didn't mean to mess things up. With you and Andy, I mean."

"Me and Andy?" Confusion, then comprehension slipped across his face. With a sigh, he slowly slid his arms out from around me.

"We never did have that talk last night, did we?"

"No, you dodged that conversation pretty efficiently when you took off like someone lit your pants on fire."

Jake looked down at me, something unfathomable moving behind those beautiful brown eyes. He glanced over at the shelf of photographs, then down at me again. Reaching out for my hands, he led me back over to his desk chair and pulled me down onto his lap.

I squirmed, absolutely certain that his girlfriend catching me sitting on his lap was going to be 100 times worse than catching the two of us hugging, but the arm he had anchored around my waist rendered me completely immobile.

"Bells, why did you come here today?"

"I wanted to see you."

Realizing I wasn't going anywhere until he decided to let me I let myself relax, reaching up to brush my fingers along the soft ridge of his hair. It was still strange to see it so short. I couldn't help but wonder if Andy preferred it that way.

"Why?"

I sighed.

"Because…I missed you. Because things aren't right when you're gone. Because even though it's stupid, and selfish, and probably the worst thing I could do to you, I couldn't go back to Dartmouth without at least trying to convince you to…"

"Convince me to what?"

"Forgive me, and be my friend again."

Jake's eyes softened, darkened, and I laid my head on his shoulder as he wrapped his other arm around my waist and squeezed.

"I need to tell you a story," he whispered, pressing his lips against my forehead before laying his cheek on my hair. "Then, Isabella Swan, if you still want me, I'd really like to try and be your friend."


	13. Chapter 13

I closed my eyes, relief rolling through me in tidal waves. I should have known it would be easy. It would always be easy with Jake.

"Once upon a time," he began in the deep, throaty narrator voice that never failed to make me laugh, "there was a really stupid 17 year old kid. He was in love with his best friend, but when he realized that her friendship was all he was going to get he did something really stupid and pushed her away. Then he decided she'd decided she didn't love him anymore, because she was in love with someone else. And he was sick of everyone feeling sorry for him. So he did something even stupider and decided he was going to disappear.

"Now, this 17 year old kid had a secret."

I snorted. "Some secret."

"Shhhhh," he hissed disapprovingly. "Do you want to tell the story?"

I mimed zipping my lips, locking them before tossing the key over my shoulder. Jake grinned.

"Good girl. I might give you a cookie after all. Anyway, the kid had a secret. He could turn into a giant werewolf that scared the beejeezus out of bad little vampires. The wolf loved the girl too, and he understood that he and the boy were going to have to go far, far away from the girl and the vampire she insisted she loved more than him.

"So the boy slipped out the window one night with a change of clothes and his ID, just in case, transformed into the wolf, and ran off without a single goodbye.

"For months the boy stayed wolf, living the life of the furry and feral. He hunted when he was hungry, slept when he was tired, and the rest of the time he ran. He ran for miles, far away from his responsibilities to his pack and to his family, in a desperate attempt to leave behind the girl that broke his heart.

"Eventually, he did. The day came when he stood on a mountain top looking out over some valley or other and realized he could breathe, truly breathe, without her name screaming in his head. He wasn't sure if it was because he was starting to move on or because he'd been a wolf for so long that there wasn't enough left of the boy to love, but he really didn't care. He was ready. It was time to come home.

"The wolf traveled day and night, never stopping to eat or sleep, until he hit the border between his home and the wilderness he'd been roaming for months. That's when he smelled it-the sugar sweet scent of vampires stalking innocent prey.

"Finally free to do his duty to his people, the wolf stalked the vampires in return. He killed them, then tracked down more vampires. For months he tracked rogue vampires all across the country, killing dozens, swearing they would never get close enough to hurt him or his family ever again. Then the morning came when he woke up and realized that he didn't care if he lived or died, as long as the hunt continued and he was able to deal out plenty of death of his own."

"Oh God, Jake," I whispered, pressing my face against his chest as he squeezed me reassuringly.

"The boy inside the wolf realized that there was nothing left of his humanity, nothing that separated the boy from the wolf. While he was tracking the monsters, he was slowly becoming one himself. So he ran again, drawn to the ocean on the distant shores of the country, as far as he could get from the people who had known him before the wolf, desperate for a chance to rediscover everything he lost without the expectations he left behind."

"And did he?" I asked softly.

Jake sighed, a whoosh of air that ruffled the wisps of my hair that had wrapped around the bristles on his chin.

"I ended up in Maine," he murmured, "hiding behind a crate watching a fisherman unload a catch of crabs. He was laughing with his friends, talking about his pretty new wife and the baby they had on the way, and I envied him. Not just the fact that he belonged, that he could be a man without feeling like his chest was being ripped open, but because he had a simple life and that simple life made him happy. It was the kind of life I always thought I'd have for myself, and I realized suddenly that I wanted that life so bad I could taste it. I was done killing, done hunting, done spreading myself too thin to be everything to everyone. I wanted…no, I _needed_ to build a life where I could just be Jake.

"Of course, the minute I started thinking about my future you popped into my mind. I knew going back to La Push was out of the question. If you were there, so was Edward, and if you weren't then I'd know you'd decided that bloodsucking fiend was the personality du jour after all, and I really didn't want to deal with that. I remembered how happy you were when you talked about Jacksonville. It was as good a place as any, so I slipped back into the woods, phased back and headed south."

He glanced down at me then, amusement tugging the edges of his lips.

"I was all set to leave Jacob Black, beta werewolf extraordinaire, behind and start a new life in Florida. Fate apparently had other plans. I was about a day and a half into my trip when a familiar smell drifted into the woods. It was like strawberries and vanilla and rainy Sundays all rolled into one, and it brought back memories I thought were long gone of rusty Rabbits and warm soda pop.

"I figured I was hallucinating. After all, what would Bella Swan, self-proclaimed nature hater, be doing in the deep woods of New Hampshire? I followed the scent just to prove you weren't really there, that I was imagining things, and lo and behold, there was Bella!

"Your eyes and a pink little nose were the only things I could see under the blue fuzzy scarf you were wearing, but somehow I knew it had to be you. You were spinning in circles with some geeky guy in a parka, laughing and stumbling and so goddamn beautifully _human_ that I thought my heart was going to break all over again. I came all the way across the country to get away from you, only to end up literally sitting right at your doorstep."

"It was the Winter Bonfire," I remembered, my heart stuttering to realize that Jake had been so close. "My roommate Max dragged me along, then plied me with liquor until I was actually drunk enough to get up and dance." I looked up at him sheepishly. "I kind of remember getting paid 10 bucks to dance with my lab partner James; he was probably the geeky kid you saw. The rest of the night's pretty much a blur though. The only thing I remember after that is waking up with an epic hangover and swearing to abstain from Tequila for the rest of my natural born life."

Jake smirked. "One Tequila, two Tequila, three Tequila…?"

"Floor?" I laughed. "More like one Tequila, two Tequila, and Bella's ready to take off her clothes and dance naked under the full moon."

He sucked in a breath and closed his eyes, tipping his head back like he was praying for patience. Heat crawled up my arms as it suddenly occurred to me that talking about taking off my clothes when I was sitting on Jake's lap probably wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done.

"Why didn't you say anything? I would have loved to see you, you know that."

Jake sighed. "I thought about it. I actually sat in the woods and watched you for the rest of the night, then followed you and the black haired girl with the nose ring…"

"Max," I interrupted. "That was my roommate Max. She was going through her goth phase at the time."

"I followed you and Max to make sure you made it back. I was going to see you, I really was, but I had been running in the woods for weeks and wanted to clean up first. There was always the chance that, since you were dancing with some other guy at the party, you'd decided to kick the lifestyle of the terminally anemic to the curb and stay human after all. I thought you might actually be happy to see me, and I didn't want to scare you off by looking like Swamp Thing gone bad.

He snorted. "I should have taken my chances. Edward was sitting on your doorstep waiting for you when you got back. He picked you up out of the car and carried you inside. I was still going to wait, maybe come back in the morning and see you when you'd had a chance to sleep it off, but the bloodsucker must have heard my thoughts because he came back out."

"Wait. _Edward_ knew you were there?"

"He didn't tell you?" Jacob laughed humorlessly. "Of course he didn't tell you. He came down that night to 'talk' to me. Said you had plenty on your plate right now with college and planning the wedding and I shouldn't do anything to make it any harder on you. He said…"

Jake's voice choked up for a second.

"He said you'd finally realized where your future was, and you didn't want me there confusing you when you'd already made up your mind."

I was furious.

"You believed him?"

"Why wouldn't I Bells? You'd gone straight from me to him the night Victoria attacked. You hadn't come to see me, and I knew you were never going to choose me." His words were passionate but his delivery was flat, frightening in its utter lack of emotion. "Why set myself up for more heartbreak when I'd just started to get over you?"


	14. Chapter 14

"I'm going to kill him," I snarled. "He _knew_ how worried I'd been about you. He _knew_ that I would have given _anything_ to see you again, and he _lied_ to keep you away from me!"

Jacob shrugged.

"I'm sure he had his reasons. I don't particularly care what they are right now, but I'm sure he had them."

"That's very…mature," I said with surprise. He grinned impishly.

"I have my moments. Besides, I had a lot of time to think between New Hampshire and Florida. I meant it when I said that you and I would be as easy as breathing, but right then breathing was getting awfully hard. Whatever else you were, or had been, you were still my best friend. If you wanted me to disappear, that's exactly what I was going to do.

"Time had lost most of its meaning by that point, so I have no clue how long I had been running, but I finally wound up wandering the streets of Jacksonville and bitching about the heat. I'd spent so long living the day to day life of a wolf that I'd almost forgotten how humans have to plan ahead. I figured I'd see if I could pick up some work somewhere, then phase and camp out in the woods until I could afford a place to live.

"My first night in town I wound up behind this ratty old garage that really did make my place back in La Push look like the Taj Mahal. I peeked in the window and saw a couple of thugs holding a gun on this old guy while he cleaned the money out of the safe. I tried to walk away, but I couldn't do it. So I did what any self-respecting hero would do and kicked down the door."

"Oh my god, what were you thinking?" I gaped at him. "You could have been killed!"

Jake looked at me, baffled.

"You really don't get it, do you? I'm a _werewolf¸_ Bella. I'd spent the better part of the last 2 years hunting _vampires._ It takes a lot more than a punk with a Glock and the reflexes of an overweight 80 year old man to take me down. Those guys never knew what hit them."

I shuddered, burying my face in his shoulder again. Sure, he was a werewolf. The newborns had crushed the entire right side of his body and he was still here. He could probably take a bullet, then sit down and eat a cow five minutes later. Didn't make the thought of him deliberately facing down a couple of street punks any easier.

"The old man's name was Smithwick; he owned the garage. He pegged me for a runaway right off the bat, asked me if I was new in town and if I had a place to stay. I told him I was 18 and no one was going to come looking for me, but I had my eye open for a cheap place to crash." A smile flitted at the corner of his mouth. "Smitty was a bulldozer. He had me in his car and on the road to his house before I knew what hit me.

"The Smithwicks had a condo just a few blocks over from where Renee lives now. I barely remember the car trip; the weeks of running had finally caught up to me. I was used to sleeping wherever I happened to drop, but since I didn't think Smitty would appreciate having to haul me out of his car I tried to keep my eyes open. By the time we got there I was so exhausted I could barely see straight, much less carry on a conversation. Smitty introduced me to his wife, Darla, told me his daughter was off at some fancy school in New York and pointed me toward the guest room. I think I was out before my head hit the pillow."

Jake chuckled.

"I might have been out of it, but I didn't miss the look Darla gave me when I walked in the door. She was _not_ happy Smitty had brought me home, although she fixed up a breakfast fit to feed an army for me the next morning. Said she knew teenage boys all ate like wolves. I remember laughing, thinking she had no idea how right she was. I should have given her a little more credit.

"Darla was a helluva cook. I hadn't had a cooked meal in forever, and I think I would have licked the plate clean if I wasn't absolutely positive she would have freaked out. Smitty came walking in the back door as I was finishing up, a pile of shopping bags in his arms and an old pair of coveralls tossed over his shoulder. He handed them all to me and told me to get my ass upstairs and into the shower or we were going to be late for work.

"Guilt and embarrassment almost ate me alive when I realized he'd gone out and bought me new clothes. I couldn't very well argue though, since the stuff I'd brought with me from Forks was filthy and falling apart by then. I promised myself I'd pay him back as soon as I had some cash. God knows how he knew what size to buy, but twenty minutes later I was sporting brand new threads, a good, solid pair of work books and a pair of Smitty's best coveralls."

"Not that I don't have implicit faith in your mechanical skills, but Smitty really hired you right off the street just because you beat up a couple of street toughs?"

"Nah." Jake grinned. "I'm pretty sure he just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to bolt, so he gave me something to do and no choice about doing it. He set me to work cleaning up the shop." He paused. "It was like…coming home after a long vacation. Everything looks different, yet somehow it's all still the same.

"A couple of hours later I heard a car pull into the shop. The owner got out and started arguing. I guess the shop had done some work on the car the week before, and now the damn thing was getting stuck between gears. The guy wanted to blame Smitty, told him he was going to sue him for a new transmission.

"Now, any idiot with ears could hear the car just needed some lube and a couple new valves. I didn't think, just offered to fix it for free if the guy paid for the parts. Only took an hour. By the time I was done the guy's car ran like a kitten, and I had a job.

"I was walking on air by the time I got home that night. Smitty had offered to throw in room and board as part of my salary, since he ran a low-budget garage and the profit margin was pretty slim back then. I'd stay at his house and take my meals with him and Darla, which would let me start putting money in the bank for a car and a place of my own. I loved my job, and I figured out pretty quick that Smitty was a blast to work for as long as you toed the line.

"Needless to say, I wasn't ready to open the front door and find my Dad and Sue Clearwater sitting at Darla's kitchen table."

I sat up and gaped at him.

"Sue and Billy were here? How did they find you?"

"Talk about small worlds. Turns out Darla was some kind of cousin of Harry's. Second or third twice removed, or something like that. Anyway, they were close enough that she spent some time on the reservation growing up. She'd heard the stories, and she knew what I was the minute I walked through the door."

"How on earth could she had known who you were? Did someone tell her you were missing?"

Jake cocked an eyebrow, giving me that patient look you'd give a toddler trying to grasp a concept for the very first time.

"_What_ I was, Bella, not _who_ I was. She knew all about werewolves. I guess my temperature, my tattoo and the fact that I'm a little taller than your average teen tipped her off. She called Sue, who immediately called Sam and my Dad and hopped the first flight for the coast.

"I figured she and Billy were going to ring a peal over my head for taking off for so long then popping up on the other side of the country, but they were actually cool with it. Sue hugged me and cried, said she was just glad I was okay and that Seth said hello."

"No word from Leah?" I smirked.

"Don't worry, Hell hasn't frozen over yet," he said, amused. "Although I was starting to wonder by the time I got done talking to Billy. He wasn't even mad, just said that he understood why I needed to get away and he was happy I was staying with family-sort of. He said he'd keep my secret, but that I needed to pick up the phone more often or he was going to change his mind and haul me all the way back to Forks on the back of his wheelchair.

"They also had a message from Sam. He said to take as long as I needed, but keep my nose clean and check in so he knew he hadn't set a psychotic werewolf on a murderous rampage through the streets of Jacksonville."

"He did not."

I couldn't see the very proper Sam Uley saying anything so outlandish, even to Jake.

Jake grinned. "All right, so I embellished a little, but that's what he meant. The bottom line was, I got to stay, Sam would keep an eye on Billy, and I had to stay with Darla and Smitty and check in more often than once a year."

Jake's smile turned wistful. "I wish you'd had the chance to meet Smitty and Darla. You'd have loved them. Smitty was gruff, but he was a real softy at heart. Darla reminds me a little of Sue; she'd mother you to death if you didn't move quick enough. I think she was a little afraid I was going to eat her, even after Sue promised on our ancestors that I was a perfectly acceptable houseguest. She shoveled so much food down my throat that first year I could barely walk, much less actually chase anything down!"

I frowned.

"Where are they now?"

Jake's eyes shifted to the photographs on the shelves. I suddenly realized that the man and the woman in the pictures I'd seen earlier had to be Smitty and Darla.

"Darla had always wanted to go to Mexico, so Smitty took her to Cancun for her birthday. One night they got caught in the crossfire between two rival gangs caught in the middle of a turf war."

"Oh God."

Jake's face was grim.

"They were the closest thing to family I had out here. I think if I hadn't had to keep the shop up and running to keep a roof over my head I would have headed down there and taught their killers what territorial rights _really_ means."

"So that's how you ended up with the shop?"

"Yeah. Neither Smitty or Darla had much family. They'd told me over and over again they thought of me like a son, but I didn't realize they meant it until their lawyer came by the house after their funeral. He told me that the Smithwicks-he said it with this impossibly stuffy British accent that I just wanted to stuff down his throat-the Smithwicks had left instructions for their liquid assets to be placed in a trust fund for their daughter's education, but that everything else was to go to me."

Jake reached down and started playing with my fingers. I had the sinking feeling he was deliberately trying not to look at me, and my stomach clenched in fear. I had pushed to know where he'd been and what he'd been doing, but suddenly I was absolutely, positively, 100% certain that I didn't want to hear whatever he was about to say.

"Smitty's will left me the shop, a majority share in the business, Darla's car and the 1967 Grand Prix convertible Smitty had been restoring when he died, the condo…" he paused, looking up. "…and Andy."


	15. Chapter 15

You could have heard a pin drop in the silence that filled the office after Jacob's…unexpected announcement.

"Let me get this straight," I said slowly. "The Smithwicks just…gave you Andy?"

Jake nodded.

"According to Smitty's will I was to have full legal guardianship of one Catalina Andreya Yolanda Smithwick, the Smithwicks' only daughter, until her 18th birthday and complete control over her trust fund until she turns 21."

I was pretty sure I was gaping at this point.

"Are you seriously telling me that the Smithwicks left _you_ guardianship of Andy, who's a whole…what, 2 years younger than you?"

"Three, actually. She just turned 18 this past August. I have a feeling they didn't really expect me to ever end up with Andy. It was just one of those things-they needed to list somebody, and I was more or less family. I loved Andy from the minute I met her, so they knew I'd take care of her. I was the logical choice for an empty line that never should have been more than another space on a really long piece of paper."

My mind was reeling, stuck on what Jake had just said. He'd loved Andy from the minute he met her. Loved. Present tense.

"Makes sense," I said, gently pulling out of his grasp and walking over to the covered windows. "They'd have wanted to know she was in good hands."

Jake chuckled.

"That might have been stretching it that first year. See, Andy had been on a full ride to the American Academy of Ballet in NY, with a position in the Corps de Ballet at her fingertips and Julliard as an option on the side if she decided she wanted to go to college instead. She'd been training for it since…well, almost since birth. Darla swears she cut her teeth on a pair of toe shoes. Seeing her up on stage…it's magic. It's like she was born to it.

"After the accident, she refused to go back. Said she wanted to stay, help me run the shop. I probably should have put my foot down, at least made her finish out the year, but I was so wrapped up in trying to figure out how to run a business I just didn't have the energy to fight with her. And it was nice having her here, having someone to come home to at the end of the night instead of living in an empty house."

Jake's face sobered.

"She was a godsend when Quil came to stay. He was a wreck, Bells. I know it's hard to tell, looking at him now, but he's come a long way since the day I stuck him on a plane and dragged him away from Forks. For two years his whole life was wrapped up in taking care of Claire. Andy fills that need, giving him someone to take care of and then bullying him into taking care of himself. I'm honestly not sure he would have made it that first year if it hadn't been for her."

I turned, smiling weakly.

"That's great. So, should I be expecting a save the date card?"

All right, so it was petty. I certainly didn't begrudge Jacob his happiness, and he was obviously crazy about the pretty blonde coed I had no doubt was at that moment downstairs charming the pants off of his customers. Lord knew my own wedding was thundering ahead like a freight train. The small fraction of my heart that belonged to Jake, however, was screaming at the thought of him spending the rest of his life with someone else.

'He said he'd wait, damn it! He said I'd always have the option! What right does she have to take my option away!'

I didn't say it, had no right to say it, but that didn't mean a small hint of the…discomfort (oh c'mon Bella, let's call a spade a spade and admit you're jealous of the little prom queen) roiling in my stomach didn't leak out every now and again.

"Save the date cards?" Jake asked, looking perplexed. "I don't even know what those _are_, much less why you'd be expecting one."

"Save the date cards? You know, for a wedding, so people leave the date open?" Jake was still looking blank, and I had to sigh at the obtuseness of the male species. "For you and Andy?"

He stared at me for a minute, dumbfounded, then did the last thing I expected.

He burst into laughter.

Not soft chuckles, not a gentle moment of mirth, but rib clenching, side busting, roll around on the floor until you cry gales of laughter. I scowled.

"What's so funny?"

Jake looked up at me from the floor, tears streaking down his face.

"You thought that Andy and I…were…" He took several deep breaths to get himself back under control. "You thought Andy and I were getting _married_?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, not right now, but someday."

"For the love of God, why?"

I glared at him. If this was how he acted about the subject of marriage it was no wonder the poor girl hadn't even brought it up, despite the way they obviously felt about each other.

"Isn't that what you do when you love someone?" I asked sarcastically. "You know, the wedding thing, with the rings and the promises and the 'til death do us part's'?"

Jake sat up, his shoulders still shaking with restrained mirth, then pulled himself up off the floor.

"Bella, I don't know where you got this crazy idea stuck in your head, but I do solemnly promise you that I am not, now or in the future, going to be getting married to Andy."

"Why not?"

Jake rolled his eyes.

"Make up your mind, would you? A few minutes ago you were upset at the thought of Andy and I living in the same house, now you're asking why I'm not going to marry her?"

"I was never upset about you and Andy living in the same house!" I protested. "I was upset because her parents were obviously irresponsible in assigning her care to a bratty teenage werewolf who says that he loves her but has hysterics on the carpet at the thought of saying 'I do!'"

I was seething with fury at this point, although whether it was at Jake for being so cavalier about the whole thing or the ludicrousness of the entire situation I couldn't have told you. The smile slipped off his face as he realized that I was perfectly serious.

"Bells, it's not like that with Andy and I. It never has been."

"But you said you loved her, from the minute you met her, remember? So what, you're just going to keep her till she grows up, let her fall in love with you, then toss her out to the proverbial wolves?"

A horrible grinding sound filled the room, and I realized Jake was (literally) gnashing his teeth. Great. I was stuck in an office with a werewolf that I had just managed to seriously piss off. This day just kept getting better and better.

"Are you implying," he snarled, "that I would _ever_ treat Andy with that kind of disrespect?" (I was mildly fascinated at how he managed to do that, since the rest of him was completely human.) "She deserves better than that, and _if_ I was interested in her like that I certainly wouldn't treat her with less respect than I would show a common street whore. For your information, however, I have _never_, nor will I _ever_, see Andy that way."

"So what, she's your…surrogate daughter? Your _ward_?" I snarked back.

Jake's face lit up like Christmas, laughter booming as he made an almost instantaneous transformation from fuming predator to good natured man.

"Oh, ask her that. I dare you," he gasped. "I would LOVE to see her face. But no, she's not my daughter, or my ward. She's more of a…bratty little sister who I love and for whom I happen to be financially responsible. I never saw her as anything other than that, and if I ever had any inclinations in that direction Embry would have beaten them out of me long before now."

Okay, now not only did I feel like a total jerk, I was completely clueless.

"Embry?" I asked, hoping he'd shed some light on the subject and I wouldn't have to drag it out of him.

"Yep. Embry," he said, his breath still coming in bursts of laughter. "Imprinted on Andy the minute he walked through the door. It was the funniest thing I ever saw."

Well shit.


	16. Chapter 16

_**Author's Note: A huge thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed so far. You guys are amazing! Stay tuned, there's a lot going on in the next five or six chapters. And to everyone who said things were getting just a little too mushy (and it had been far too long since anyone tried to eat Bella), relax. There's plenty of action coming up. After all, the path to true love ne'er did run smooth!**_

Why can't you ever find a vampire that wants to kill you when you need one? I have never been so mortified in my entire life. For once, however, luck was on my side. Embry and Quil picked that moment to come crashing through the office door, saving me the humiliation of having to beg Jacob to just phase, bite my head off and put me out of his misery.

"All right you two, break it up," said Quil, oblivious to the tension in the room. "There's someone downstairs that wants to give us a whole lot of money, so the boss man here needs to get a move on."

Embry grinned, walking over and throwing his arm around my shoulders. "Don't worry, we'll take good care of Bella while you're gone."

Jacob growled. "As far as I'm concerned, I'm already gone. You're going to have to handle it."

"Oh no, old man," said Quil, leaning against the doorframe. "He won't talk to anyone but you. You're just going to have to invite Bella to dinner and get your ass back to work."

Dinner with Jake was exactly what I'd had in mind before I'd made a complete ass of myself, but Embry cut in before I could agree.

"Can't tonight," he said, looking at me uncomfortably. "We've got that…thing."

"Thing?" I asked.

"Oh crap, I forgot." Quil's face puckered up like he had just bit into something nasty. "We've got that…thing. At the place. All week."

"Oh hell, you're right," said Jake. He glanced over at me apologetically. "What these immature morons are trying to say is, Andy's ballet company has performances every night this week. It's kind of…tradition that the three of us take her out after."

"Every night?" I was surprised. The last time Edward had taken me to the ballet, it had been a black tie affair. Since the three men in front of me usually had to be blackmailed into putting on a _shirt_, much less a tie, I would have figured they would have gone to a single performance and called it a day.

That's if they didn't plead strangulation and duck out at intermission.

"Yeah," said Embry. "It's sort of an all week thing, since it's the company and the younger kids at the school she teaches at. Each class has their own night, and since Andy teaches all of them…"

"And then performs after, we kind of have to be there," said Quil in resignation. Embry took his arm off my shoulder to smack him in the back of the head.

"Knock it off you two," said Jake, turning to me with regret in his eyes. "They're right, we kind of owe it to Andy to be there, and it's always been kind of a family thing. Could we maybe get together this weekend?"

I was surprised at how much it hurt to realize that Jake was already excluding me from the little family he'd made. Somehow, I think I'd been expecting him to invite me along, welcome me into every corner of his life with open arms like he had before. Then I remembered.

"I have to head back to New Hampshire on Thursday," I said softly. "There's a thing for TA's on Friday I have to be at."

I'd been so excited to get the TA job with the English department at the beginning of the year, teaching English and American Lit to incoming freshman. I'd loved every minute, but at that moment I wished I'd never applied.

Jake's face fell. "So I'm not going to get to see you again before you leave?"

I shrugged. "Maybe we could do lunch one day this week?"

I knew from the look on his face the answer was going to be no.

"I've got lunch meetings all this week," he said softly. "You were lucky to catch me today."

"Well, that's what happens when you go and get all incorporated," I said, trying to sound perky. I had a feeling from the nervous looks Quil and Embry were giving me that "deranged" might have been a little closer. "Hey wait. I forgot. I still need you to look at Renee's car."

Quil snorted.

"Don't call that hunk of rust on wheels you drove in here with a car. That's insulting to cars everywhere that actually manage to get from 0 to 50 in less than 3.2 years. I changed the oil, flushed your fluids and tweaked the engine for you while you were up here running your mouth, so there's a good chance you _might_ make it back home before it falls apart."

I looked at him in surprise, my eyes overflowing with gratitude. He shrugged, glancing uncomfortably between me and Jake.

"It wasn't that big a deal."

"It was so, and you know it," I said with a smile. "How much do I owe you?"

"Not a thing," said Quil, grinning as Jake arched an eyebrow. "Hey, you're just pissed that I said it first."

"I can't let you do that," I protested, afraid they were going to think I only came to take advantage, yet again, of their underpriced mechanic's skills.

"Of course you can," said Embry with an impish grin. "You say 'Thank you Jake and Quil for walking right into the trap of my feminine lures and fixing up my car,' then you sashay that cute little behind right out the door."

He laughed as Jake grabbed him and dragged him into a playful headlock. I shook my head. Nope, he hadn't changed a bit.

Just then the phone rang.

"That'll be Andy, wondering where the hell you are," said Quil, grabbing Embry by the arm and backing him out the door. "I'll stall for a few minutes, but I can't hold him off forever so move your ass."

"Hey!"

Quil and Embry both stopped, staring at me in surprise. I smiled and held out my arms.

"That means I'm not going to see you two again either, so how about a little love?"

I didn't look at Jake as Embry scooped me up in a huge hug and Quil placed a light kiss on my cheek.

"Take care of yourself, Bella," he murmured.

"You too. And thanks again."

I sniffed as they walked out of the room, leaving me and Jake alone for what could be the last time.

"So," I said, turning to give him a watery smile. "I guess this is goodbye?"

He sighed, rubbing his neck in frustration. I knew how he felt. After that afternoon, I felt closer to Jake than ever. Leaving now just felt…wrong, somehow, as though the story was still incomplete.

"How about we say 'See you later', and I see what I can work out?" he said finally. I beamed.

"Sounds good." I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling his head down to plant a kiss on his cheek and laughing when he picked me up and spun me in big, lazy circles. "I'll see you around."


	17. Chapter 17

Whatever else you could say about him, Quil knew his cars. Renee's car purred like a kitten, practically begging me to push the pedal just a little bit harder, and I was grinning when I pulled into her driveway and cut the engine. That grin grew even bigger when I saw the red-headed pixie standing in the shadows on Renee's front porch.

"Alice!" I yelled, flying out of the car and up the porch steps. "Oh my god! What are you doing here? Your hair looks great! Wait…what _are _you doing here?"

Alice laughed, lightly squeezing me back.

"I'm here to see you, thanks, Rosalie talked me into it, and I had a vision."

I frowned, pulling away. Her visions usually ended up with somebody trying to kill me.

"What kind of vision?"

"I have seen," she said, waving her hand dramatically, "that we're going shopping for your trousseau tomorrow and you're going to love it!"

I groaned, laughing as I unlocked the door and led her into the house.

"First of all, your age is showing again. _Nobody _calls it a trousseau anymore. And what's wrong with the clothes I have?"

"Yes, but trousseau sounds so much better than 'random honeymoon outfits that you're hardly ever going to wear anyway,' and I'm not even going to dignify your second question with a response."

Grinning, I walked into Renee's spacious kitchen and dug a bottle of Pepsi out of the fridge. Alice wandered in behind me, her eyes popping wide as she looked around.

"This is beautiful," she breathed. "Someone has a real eye for color."

"That would be Renee."

Even I had to admit, Renee and Phil had done a great job with the house. The kitchen was a gourmet's dream. I'd helped Renee find the range and grill top stove when she'd first moved in, and the countertop spanned the entire kitchen in deep blue marble. The cupboards were the same beautiful teak as the table and chairs, the walls were a sunny yellow, and the Mexican-style curtains and throw rugs made the room warm and welcoming.

"She's coming with us," Alice decided, only a second before she grabbed my hands and spun me around with glee. "Oh, Bella, it's going to be so much fun!"

She pulled me into a hug, then stepped back quickly. Her nose scrunched up, a brief expression of distaste on her face before it smoothed out, but it was enough. She'd smelled the wolves on me and hadn't said anything, and since she wasn't used to me walking around smelling like werewolf anymore…

Edward had already told her.

"Alice, what are you _really_ doing here?" I asked, leaning against the counter and pinning her with a suspicious glare. She smiled nervously.

"I told you, I had a vision of us going wedding shopping tomorrow."

"Uh huh." I suddenly wasn't amused. "You mean you had a vision of Edward coming back from Jacksonville and asking you to come out here and keep an eye on me, since he can't trust me not to get myself killed for another 3 days."

With a sigh, she fluffed her hair in one of those oh-so-human gestures the Cullens had perfected over the years.

"All right, Edward _might_ have been a bit concerned when he got back. And he _might_ have asked me to make sure you were safe and happy while he and Jasper finish cleaning up the…situation…in Forks. But I really did want to take you wedding shopping, so it was the perfect opportunity. I mean, next semester you're going to be so busy student teaching and teaching classes and preparing for graduation you're not going to have time, and I bet you haven't got a thing in your closet to wear to the Graduation Ball."

She knew she had me.

"I completely forgot about the stupid ball," I said through gritted teeth, completely forgetting that I meant to grill her about the "situation" that Edward and Jasper were taking care of.

"Oh, see honey, that's why I'm here. We'll make sure you have something absolutely stunning. After all," and her lips curled into an evil grin, "who better to make sure you're the most gorgeous woman in the room than someone who already knows what everyone else will be wearing?"

Now, you have to understand something about the Graduation Ball. It is, hands down, _the_ biggest event of your senior year at Dartmouth. It's your last social event at the college, and the faculty goes all out-supposedly to celebrate your success but, I suspected, mostly to make sure you left with fond memories so you'd gladly give to the alumni once you were gone. Whatever their motives, it was always spectacular. Edward had already informed me I absolutely was not allowed to skip out and spend the night in my sweats with a book instead, no matter how many left feet I had.

"It's one of those amazing human experiences you really don't want to miss," he'd said when I'd protested. "And I'm really looking forward to the chance to press my lips to yours under the final archway as we celebrate the end of our college years and the beginning of our own happily ever after."

It all sounded so romantic, and while the cynic in me was arguing that it was going to be anything but (just look how prom turned out) I didn't want to let Edward down. That's why, at 7:45 the next morning, I was sitting in the back seat of Alice's car as we raced down the highway to the Jacksonville Landing.

"Bella, this is going to be so much fun," gushed Renee, beaming at Alice. "But wasn't it an awful lot of trouble to come all the way out here just to take Bella shopping?"

Alice shrugged. In deference to the mid-winter Florida sunshine she'd wrapped her head in a scarf, donned a huge pair of oversized glasses and slathered herself in foundation. If I hadn't seen her get dressed that morning, I don't think I would have recognized her.

"It really wasn't any bother. I've missed Bella horribly. Don't get me wrong, I'm really very glad Jasper and I decided to head down to Brazil-the field experience has been amazing-but we get home so rarely it's like I never get to see her anymore. When Edward told me she still had a few days left before she had to go back, I just couldn't help myself."

Renee chuckled. Wholeheartedly approving of Alice's decision to study conservation in the rainforest instead of here in the States, she and Alice had gotten along like two peas in a pod. The pair had talked well into the night about decorating schemes for the reception, arguing for almost an hour about the differences between eggshell and ivory. If you asked me, they were both white, but I was glad to see how well my new family fit into my old one. Charlie may not have liked Edward, but he loved Alice, and he and Carlisle and Esme seemed to get along well enough. Renee was, I think, a bit leery of how serious I had gotten with Edward, but as she and the Cullen women had planned my wedding the three of them had forged what seemed to be a really good relationship.

It did, however, frighten me a bit that most of it seemed to be centered around shopping.

All too quickly we were pulling into the parking lot of one of Jacksonville's biggest shopping centers. I cringed slightly. Alice was a great shopping partner, and she had an amazing eye for what would make me look like something other than the Ugly Duckling in the huge crowd of swans I tended to hang out with (I snickered sometimes at the comparison, since I was the only "Swan" in the bunch), but shopping expeditions with her were more like all-day marathons.

"So, Bella, where do you want to start?" Alice asked, bouncing up and down on her toes like a child in an ice cream shop. "We could hit the Body Shop, or cruise through Jacksonville Starz-you looked great in that catsuit I bought you last year-or we could…"

"Why don't we start with Nine West?" I suggested, just a little bit desperately. The outlet store always stocked the latest fashion faves from Europe, and I figured since Edward was taking me to Paris for our honeymoon there was a good chance what they had there would help me blend in. I loved to travel, and Edward had shamelessly indulged me over the years with trips to Ireland, Brazil (we'd had a great time at Festival with Alice and Jasper just last year), England, China and the Philippines, but I hated feeling like a tourist.

Then there was the fact that Nine West stocked everything from designer grunge to formal wear, which meant I _might_ get away with making this trip a one stop shop. I doubted it, but hey, a girl's gotta try.

"Good idea," said Renee, smiling over at me. "They'll have a lot of what you need, and we'll have a better idea of what we're looking for when we head over to the others."

Then again, maybe not.

"All right!" said Alice, stepping between us and linking her arms through ours like a pint-sized Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. "Off we go!"

Half an hour later I was standing in the dressing room at Nine West, critically eying myself in the mirror. We'd decided to start with gowns for the Graduation Ball, since that was likely to be the biggest challenge, and there was a huge pile hanging on the door and laid out on the bench at my feet.

I didn't think I was going to need it though. You know how sometimes you put on a dress and you just _know_? The moment I'd spotted the soft, smoky blue gown hanging on the rack, I knew. It wasn't silk, and it wasn't cotton, but it was somewhere in between, heartbreakingly soft and breathtakingly gorgeous. Halter topped with a sweetheart neckline, it nipped in at the waist before flowing down to my feet like something out of a fairy tale.

Glancing down at the soft skirts swishing around my ankles I couldn't resist doing a quick little spin, giggling like a little girl when the fabric dipped and spun around me.

"C'mon Bella, don't we get to see?" called Alice.

"Coming!"

'One last check in the mirror to make sure my underwear isn't hanging out,' I thought, grimacing at the thought of flashing the uninspired white cotton bra and panty set I had on in front of the haute couture at Nine West. I looked into the mirror's reflective surface…

…and saw Jane's glowing red eyes staring back at me.


	18. Chapter 18

I screamed. I'm not talking about one of those chintzy little screams you give when the boy next door threatens to stick a lizard down your dress. It was a hair raising, toe curling shriek that would have fit right in at the latest Hollywood horror.

It seemed only appropriate, since I was going to die.

"Bella? Bella, what's wrong?" Alice yelled, pounding on the door.

I couldn't move, couldn't breathe. Terror held me frozen in its grip as Jane leaned forward, and I braced myself for the rend and tear of her teeth sinking into my skin. Jane's lips slowly curled into an evil smile, her breath brushing against my cheek as she whispered, "We're watching you."

Then she was gone.

Had that really just happened? The logical part of my brain argued that I must have been imagining things. What would Jane be doing here? How had she managed to come in without me seeing her? And why hadn't Alice seen her arrive?

The goosebumps curling up and down my spine, however, told a different story. I reached over, opened the door to the dressing room with trembling fingers and threw myself into Alice's arms.

"Bella?" Alice patted me on the back gently, and I could hear the confusion in her voice. "Bella, what's going on?"

"Bella, honey, are you okay?" Renee was standing behind Alice, anxiously staring down at me. I wanted to be able to nod and tell her I was fine, but the memory of the gleeful mirth on Jane's face had me fighting not to regurgitate my breakfast all over Alice's patent leather Jimmy Choos.

"Jane," I whispered, too softly for my words to carry. I knew Alice would hear me.

"Is there a problem here?"

The sweet, matronly voice belonged to the manager on duty at Nine West, and as I peered over Alice's shoulder I realized that my screams had attracted the attention of pretty much everyone in the store.

"We're fine," Alice said smoothly, her small frame tight with tension. "Bella thought she saw a spider. She's horribly phobic. I'm very sorry for the disturbance."

The manager frowned, nodding to one of the sales girls to go into the dressing room. The girl grimaced, but marched bravely inside. I guess spiders weren't welcome inside the doors at Nine West.

"My apologies," she said stiffly. "Why don't you come on over to another stall, and I'll have Elizabeth bring over your clothes."

Elizabeth must have been the poor, innocent victim that had to wander through all those yards of silk and lace looking for a bug that didn't exist. I'm sure I would have felt sorry for her if I could stop trembling.

"Thank you so much," Alice said in that light, placating tone that all but screamed 'thank you for humoring the crazy person'. I really hated that everyone thought I was neurotic now, but that didn't stop me from getting a death grip on Alice's hand and dragging her into the dressing room with me.

I opened my mouth to speak, but Alice shook her head. "Not here," she mouthed, looking pointedly toward the door. Couldn't have the innocent, unsuspecting humans finding out there were bloodthirsty monsters with vampire superpowers running around in the guise of golden haired angels, after all.

"Did you like the dress?" she asked, a little louder. In the stark terror of seeing Jane again I had completely forgotten I was still wearing the gown.

"This is it," I said, trying to play my part.

"Don't you want to try on some of the other ones?"

"Nope." I shook my head firmly. "This is it."

She studied me carefully, a slow smile slipping across her face.

"You know, I think you're right. I thought you were crazy when you grabbed it off the rack, but oh Bella, you look like a princess. Pair it up with a tiara and some silver slippers and Edward's going to be eating out of your hand-metaphorically speaking, of course."

She was only joking, but a flashback of James greedily feeding from my wrist flashed into my mind and I started to hyperventilate.

"Okay, not funny, I'm sorry," said Alice, a contrite look on her face as she eased me down onto the bench. "C'mon, Bella, breathe."

"Bad joke Alice," I gasped out, struggling to remind my lungs that dragging air in and out wasn't optional. Someone tapped lightly on the door.

"Miss? I have your clothes."

Alice walked over and opened the door, smiling broadly at the sales clerk.

"Thanks, but we'll just need the street clothes. She's happy with the dress."

"Yes ma'am," she said, handing over the comfy jersey and cut offs I'd worn in. I grinned as Alice grimaced at the uber-casual ensemble. "If you'll just bring the dress up when you're done we'll be happy to box it for the trip home."

Alice looked at me questioningly. I nodded, still struggling to catch my breath.

"It's got…to go…on a plane Thursday anyway…so…no point…in worrying…about wrinkles now."

She nodded, turning back to the clerk, who was staring at me.

"Could I bring you some water miss?" she asked, her eyes bright with concern.

I nodded, my face flushing with embarrassment at what she must be thinking. Hyperventilating over spiders. It was ridiculous, but since I wasn't even going to try to explain Jane I had to let it ride. I wasn't sure I was ever going to be able to show my face in this store again.

"Could you ask her mother to come back too?" Alice asked smoothly. "I'm sure we scared her to death."

The clerk…Elizabeth…nodded, then rushed off. I quickly shimmied out of the dress and back into my street clothes, pulling on my sneakers as Renee slipped through the door.

"Bella honey, are you all right?" she asked, her brows knitted together with concern. "I've never heard you freak out over a spider like that."

"I'm fine, more embarrassed than anything," I said, semi-truthfully.

"She's still a little shaky," said Alice. "I know we had a whole day planned, but do you mind if we head back? I think Bella could do with some rest."

Renee frowned. "All this over a spider?"

Oh crap. I had forgotten about the tarantula my cousin Jesse had brought over when we were kids. The two of us had had a great time playing with the thing, holding it in our hands and watching it crawl over our fingers. Renee knew full well I wasn't afraid of spiders, certainly not afraid enough to need to go lie down all afternoon like a Victorian maiden with the vapors. Think fast, think fast…

"I wasn't feeling all that well this morning, and this kind of did me in," I said, crossing my fingers and hoping she'd buy it.

"You did seem a little off, but I figured it was just your natural aversion to shopping. Do you need to see a doctor?"

Yeah, like I was going to be able to explain that one. But at least Renee wasn't looking suspicious anymore.

"No, I'll be fine mom, really. I think I just need a nap, maybe something a little more solid to eat."

There was no way I was going to be able to get anything past the lump in my throat, but she seemed to buy it. I sipped on the water Elizabeth brought me, re-assured the anxious manager I would be fine and watched as Alice, over my objections, pulled out her credit card to pay for the dress. 15 minutes later we were back in the car and on our way home.

The minute we got back to the house Alice whisked me (at human speed) off to the guest room, closing the door behind her.

"What happened?"

I told her about my strange encounter with Jane, how she had just appeared, spoken, then disappeared. Alice's eyes glossed over, 'watching' for Jane, and her face grew more serious.

"I can't see her," she said finally. "I don't know why, but for some reason I can't see Jane at all. Something or someone must be shielding her from my sight. You said she said she was watching you?"

"'We'," I said dully. "She said, 'We're watching you."

Her face shifted, but before I could ask what was going on she had reached over, squeezed my hand and started walking toward the door.

"You should try and get some sleep. You're safe enough here, and I need to make some calls."

"Are you sure I'm safe? What if she comes back…or goes after Renee?"

My heart started pounding in panic at the thought of inadvertently putting Renee on the front line in a battle against the Volturi. The memory of Alec carelessly snapping Bree's neck was just a little too vivid.

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that," said Alice, sounding almost cheerful as she stepped into the hallway. "If Jane meant to kill you, you'd be dead."

Very comforting Alice, thanks.

How I managed to fall asleep when every noise sent my heart flying into my throat, I still don't know, but the next thing I knew the room was black and Renee was standing in my doorway.

"Bella, honey, Jake's on the phone. I didn't know if…"

She laughed as I leaped out of bed and snatched the phone out of her hands.

"Well, I guess that answers my question about whether you want to talk to him or not," she said wryly, stepping out and closing the door behind her.

"Jake?"

"Hey Bells."

His smooth, gentle voice washed over me like the waves on the shore at First Beach.

"What's going on?" I asked, looking at the clock. "I thought you were going to Andy's performance tonight."

"We did. We are. Here, that is. It's intermission. Listen, I've only got a minute, but I was wondering if you wanted to have breakfast with me tomorrow. It would have to be early, but I figured you're usually up early anyway-at least, you used to be-and I really hate the thought of sending you back to New Hampshire without getting to see you again."

Frowning, I stared at the phone. What was I going to tell him?

"Bells?"

I guess I had been standing there longer than I thought, because he sounded worried and just a little dejected when he said, "If you already have plans, or you don't want to…"

"No!" The last thing I wanted was for him to think I didn't want to spend time with him again. "No, it's just…Alice is here. I feel bad leaving her here by herself."

There was a long silence at the other end of the line. I winced, bracing myself for the inevitable explosion.

"Bring her with you."

Breath whooshed out of my lungs.

"Excuse me?"

"I said bring her with you."

My mouth hung open in shock. I knew Jake had grown up-a lot-since he left Forks, but I wasn't expecting this.

"Hello? Is this the right number? Am I talking to Jacob Black? The same Jacob Black that had a fit about her sitting in _my_ kitchen a few years ago? Now you're inviting her to spend the morning in _yours_?"

Jake laughed, a sharp, barking sound that wasn't quite natural, but wasn't quite forced either.

"I can't say I'm thrilled at the idea of having a bloodsucker sitting in my living room, but it would mean a lot to me to see you again before you leave and if having her over for breakfast is the only way to do it, we'll deal."

"Besides," he added, and I could hear the laughter in his voice now, "I've got a cat here I'm not particularly fond of anyway."

THERE was my Jacob. I grinned, unwilling to question my good luck.

"What time should we be there?"

We agreed to meet at 7 before hanging up, and I all but tap danced out of the room. Alice glanced up from where she was leafing through Renee's fashion magazines, surprise on her face.

"So, Alice, how do you feel about dining a la werewolf tomorrow morning?"


	19. Chapter 19

Alice, as it turned out, had absolutely no interest in having breakfast with a house full of mutts (her words, not mine) but she did agree to take me over and pick me up in case Jane was lurking around somewhere.

She also told me to thank Jake for the offer, but unless he had some sweet and sour sauce on hand, housecat wasn't really on the menu. Vampires and werewolves have a sick sense of humor.

At 7:00 the next morning I was nervously knocking on Jake's door. Andy answered, her grumpy face tightening into a deep scowl when she saw me standing there.

"Jake's in the shower," she snapped, leaving the door open as she turned to walk through the living room and into the kitchen.

All right, so she wasn't a morning person. Since she hadn't slammed the door in my face I decided not to take it personally and followed her into the house.

It was immediately obvious that whoever had put so much careful love and detail into the shop had dipped their hand in here too, because the house was gorgeous. There were dark greens and blues everywhere, with a werewolf-sized leather couch made of the same soft material that covered the chairs in his office strategically located in front of a flat screen TV. The kitchen was painted the same sunny yellow Renee had in hers, and despite the regulation appliances the atmosphere was warm and cozy.

Unfortunately, I couldn't say the same for my host.

"Where's the bloodsucker?" she snarked, laughing at the surprise on my face. "Oh, c'mon _Bells_, you can't possibly think I'm that stupid. I live with 3 wolves, for God's sake. I know about vampires."

"Alice couldn't make it," I said, frowning. "And please don't call her a bloodsucker. She's really very sweet."

Andy snorted. "Sorry, forgot you were the original vamp tramp. Didn't mean to step on any toes."

All right, now it was personal. But I couldn't think what on earth I had done in the…36?...hours since I'd met her that would have made Andy dislike me that intensely.

"Is there a problem I should know about?" I asked cautiously. "You're being awfully nasty for someone who barely knows me."

"Yeah, there's a problem. _You're_ the problem. What are you doing here?"

"Having breakfast?"

She rolled her eyes.

"I don't mean here, here, I mean _here_. In Jake's life. What, exactly, do you think you're going to accomplish? Did you think he was just going to come crawling back to you because you happened to show up one day? How long are you going to stay this time, Bella? How long does he have to wait until you yank his heart out and stomp all over it again?"

I floundered, surprised, and she laughed.

"Yeah, I thought so. Listen up," she said, glancing down a hallway toward the sound of a running shower, "he's going to be out in a minute, so I'm going to keep this quick. Did you know that Jake hasn't moved our rooms around since my parents died?"

"Noooo." I had no clue where she was going with this.

"My room is right next to his, which means my first summer back after he came to live with us I had to hear him wake up _every night_ yelling your name. Then I'd hear him cry himself back to sleep. He'd get up in the morning like nothing had happened, but I knew.

"Jake's had it rough here. Not everyone was happy when Dad took him in, and he caught a lot of hell when he took over the business because not everyone liked having an Indian telling them what to do. There were even a couple of guys stupid enough to throw their fists in his face. None of the slurs, the angry voices or the fights bothered him. They never touched him. I never even saw him get angry, and yet he woke up every night crying for _you_."

She stopped, staring at me. I realized tears were dripping down my face and quickly wiped them away.

"You broke him, Bella. He's just started picking up the pieces, and I don't want to see you tear him apart again when you go. I don't know what your intentions are, and quite frankly, I don't care. But you better not hurt him again."

From somewhere in the distance I heard a shower shut off, but most of my attention was on the bristling teenager in front of me.

"There hasn't been a day that's gone by in the last 3 years that I haven't been sorry for hurting Jacob the way I did," I said softly. "I love him, Andy. He was my best friend, and I loved him then too, just not the way he wanted me to. I can't promise I'm never going to hurt him again, but I can tell you that we're both doing our best to leave the past behind us."

There was nothing else I could say.

"Hey Bells!"

Jake jogged into the kitchen, bare chested and dripping wet, and placed a quick kiss on my cheek. For a moment my mouth went dry. I had always known he was beautiful on some level, but age and maturity (and a healthy dose of newly awakened hormones) had me seeing his tanned skin and muscular torso in a whole new light.

"Where's the blood-Alice?" Jake asked, leaning over to give Andy a quick peck on the cheek before he walked over to the fridge.

"She decided breakfast wasn't such a good idea. She said to tell you hello, and thank you for the offer, but that you probably didn't have enough sweet and sour sauce to put housecat on the menu."

He chuckled, pulling out a carton of orange juice and taking a swig. Andy groaned in disgust.

"Ugh. Here. Some of the rest of us would like some too, you know."

She handed him two glasses and he grinned, pouring some in each and handing one over to me. I took it, surprised when Andy simply walked out of the kitchen. After the conversation we'd just had, I figured making sure I had something to drink would have been the last thing on her list.

"So if Alice isn't here, why does my front porch smell like leech? Sorry!" He held up his hands, sloshing orange juice in the process. "Vampire. I meant, why does my front porch smell like vampire?"

Oh shit. I had completely forgotten that I was going to have to tell Jake about Jane. Hmmm. It sounded like a bad children's book. 'Jake and Jane went up a hill to fetch a pail of blood…' All right, maybe it wasn't that funny after all.

"Alice drove me over. She said to give her a call and she'd pick me up when we were done."

Jacob frowned.

"Why? Is she afraid I'm going to send you back in pieces?"

"No no no! Nothing like that." I absolutely, positively did NOT want to start a fight between Jake and Alice, especially when he'd finally bent enough to invite her over for breakfast. "It's just...Alice wasn't my only unexpected visitor yesterday. Jane popped up when we were shopping at the mall."

"Who's Jane?"

Crap. I _really_ didn't want to have to explain to Jake about the Volturi, driving home the fact that once again, hanging out with me was bringing trouble straight to his doorstep. Only this time he didn't have Sam and the pack to keep him safe.

"Jane is a member of the Volturi. They're sort of like a vampire council. They enforce the rules if anyone steps out of line."

I cringed at the look on his face.

"So she's an assassin. A freaking vampire assassin comes up to you and you don't tell me about it until now? What the hell, Bella?"

"I'm sorry! I honestly didn't think about it last night. Vampires trying to kill me, just another day in the life of Bella Swan, remember?"

He sighed, then reached out and pulled me into his arms. I went willingly, clinging to his back and breathing in the sweet smell of soap, shampoo and that wild, woodsy smell that was just Jake.

"I'm glad you're alright," he murmured. "What did she want?"

"I don't know," I said, burying my face in his chest. "She just smiled this creepy little smile, said, 'We're watching you,' and disappeared."

"Same old, same old." He sighed again. "Well, if you've got Alice at your house and me, Quil and Embry here I guess you're safe enough for now. But what are you going to do when you go back to school? Maybe you should take some time off, stay down here…"

He trailed off when I started violently shaking my head.

"Uh uh. I've only got one semester left, and I'm not letting Jane or anyone else get in my way. Besides, it's not like I'll be alone. Edward will be there."

"Yeah, but it's not like he can watch you all the time…" Jake paused, "…unless he can. I guess I should have realized that you guys probably shacked up on campus."

"Don't be a pig, Jake, it's not like that. There's nothing wrong with living with my fiancé," I grumbled, pushing back out of his arms. He stared back at me, that same quiet, aggravating calm chasing any emotion out of his face.

"Don't DO that!" I smacked him in the shoulder.

"What? What did I do?" he asked, looking offended now.

"You get that calm, alpha look on your face when you're upset," I whined. "It's creepy."

"I'm sorry. Is this better?"

His eyes rolled back in his head, his tongue lolled out, and for a brief second I could see the wolfy grin he'd given me the first time I'd seen him phase. It made me laugh, which made him smile.

"I don't want to fight with you Bells, not today," he said seriously. "If you say this Jane isn't a problem, and you'll be safe with Edward, I'm going to believe you. But I want you to promise me that if there is a problem you'll let me know. Immediately."

"I promise," I said, knowing I was lying through my teeth. The last thing I intended to do was put Jake and the pack between me and a vampire ever again.

"Great!" he said, smiling now. "Let's eat!"

By mutual consent we didn't talk about Jane the rest of the meal. He urged me to tell him what I'd been doing since he left. He laughed as I told him stories about Max and her antics, and he seemed genuinely excited when I told him about my student teaching gig that spring. Time flew, and far too quickly it was time for him to head in to work.

"Can I use your phone to call Alice?" I asked, trying not to stare as he pulled a shirt over his head. What was wrong with me? It wasn't like it was the first time I'd seen Jake's chest, so why was it suddenly inspiring me to think thoughts that had no business being in the mind of an almost married woman?

"I'll take you home," he said, grabbing a pair of keys off an end table near the couch before putting his hand on my back to guide me out the door. "That way I know you got there safe."

"You don't have to do that," I protested as we stepped out onto the porch and Jake locked the door behind him. "I don't want to make you late."

"It's okay." He smiled, jogging ahead to open the passenger door of a black sedan. "I think the boss will understand."

The short drive down the street to Renee's house passed in silence. We had pulled into the driveway and he had popped open my door (again) before I realized he never _had_ answered my question.

"So, Jake, why _did_ you come to Renee's the other day? How did you even know I was there?"

He smiled, reaching down a hand to help me out of the car.

"Her house smelled like you," he said simply.

I guess for him, that said it all.


	20. Chapter 20

_**Author's Note: All right everyone, I want you to read this chapter carefully. Then review. **_

_**Why? Because I hate weak female characters. I do. I hate it. Stargate fans, I thought they ruined Carter in the last two seasons. Bones fans, what was UP with Bones crying and shaking and waiting for Booth to save her from the crazy doctor? Psych fans, was anyone else laughing hysterically when Juliet collared that suspect and put Lassiter to shame? **_

_**Bella in the books drove me absolutely insane with the way she just rolled over and let Edward walk all over her and never really got pissed off about it. That's not love, it's obsession. I'm finding out that I really like grown-up Bella, and I'd like to think grown-up Bella, while still in love with Edward, has a little more spine than that. Jake's always going to welcome her back with open arms, and there's a good reason for that (one we'll find out a little later on, I promise), but I think it's WAY past time Bella learned to stand up to Edward. So for everyone who ever wanted to hear Bella tell Edward to take a flying, fiery leap straight into the arms of the Volturi for the way he treated Jake, this chapter's for you!**_

_**On a side note, could you honestly see Bella dumping Edward, even after what he did, while they're living together and planning their wedding? It has been 5 years, after all. A week with Jake isn't going to sever that. So for the moment, the vampires are still a part of her life (and c'mon, don't you love Emmett's stereotypical-big-brother self just a little?). They may always be a part of her life, and they're definitely going to continue to be a big part of this story, but what part that's going to be remains to be seen! So don't hate me.**_

_**Now, on to the show…**_

A week later I was standing in the small apartment I shared with Edward near the Dartmouth campus, sipping a cup of spiced chai and smiling as I watched the snow tumble down outside. This vacation had been like something out of a dream, and not just because I actually got to spend the winter tanning in the Florida sunshine instead of slogging around in my snowpants. Being back in the orbit of my own personal sun had made me realize just how far off my own axis my life had spun.

I hadn't managed to see Jake again, although we'd talked on the phone almost daily. I did manage to sneak in lunch with Quil and Embry when I stopped by the garage to drop off Horatio's hat. Phil had laughed hysterically when I told him the story. Not only had Horatio been thrilled to have his hat back, he'd almost keeled over when he realized Phil had taken the (freshly laundered) cap to practice and had everyone, from the coach to the bat boy, put their signature on it.

He'd promised everything from eternal servitude to his next grandchild in thanks. I had to laugh. He really was a likeable man.

Embry had been in a lousy mood when I showed up. Apparently he'd caught Andy kissing some guy she went to high school with behind the garage that afternoon. I'd been horrified until Quil explained to me that, since Andy wasn't part of the tribe, Embry had been trying to give her space to grow up before he dropped that whole imprinting thing on her. She didn't know about the imprint, and she sure as hell didn't know that somewhere over the course of the past two years Embry had fallen in love with her.

Personally, I thought he was an idiot not to tell her. It wasn't like she didn't know what they were.

"I know," Embry had said softly, staring morosely down at the ham sandwiches I'd brought. "It's just…I don't want it to be like that. I didn't tell her at first because Jake told me not to. It was only a few weeks after she lost her parents, and the poor kid wasn't taking it well. Jake thought finding out she was cosmically tied to some guy she didn't even know, and a werewolf to boot, would literally send her screaming for the hills. I figured it would be enough to be near her, to be the friend she needed while she got her life put back together.

"But you've seen Andy. She's gorgeous, and she's got this huge heart. It only took a couple of weeks to realize I was falling hard. She was going to school, helping Jake run the shop, teaching ballet at the dance school down the road and performing with one of the companies on the weekends. I didn't want to take away her freedom, make her feel like she was tied down.

"She's going to have to make a lot of changes to spend forever with me, Bella. I know she's happy right now, but that might not last forever. I didn't want to take away her choices before she'd even had a chance to _live_, you know?"

He looked at me then, his eyes full of misery.

"I want her to be with me because she loves me, not because I'm tied to her through some weird, freaky wolf magic. I honestly don't think I'll be happy with anything less, and it's killing me because I know she doesn't feel that way about me. Not yet. So I get to smile and be the big brother while she goes out with that floppy haired idiot when all I really want to do is crawl across the table and rip out his throat."

All right, that sucked, but I had to respect what he was trying to do. He was giving her room to decide whether she wanted to leave or stay on her own. I wondered for a moment if Edward had ever really given me that choice.

I shook my head. Of course he had. I hadn't _had_ to start dating Edward. I'd _chosen_ this life, and that made it completely different.

Speaking of Edward…

"Bella?"

My neck tensed as his melodious voice carried through the house. I had realized something over the past week. I wasn't just mad at Edward for what he'd done to Jake. I was _furious_. The sting of betrayal was too fresh for me to smile and pretend like nothing was wrong. I stiffened my shoulders, set my jaw and continued staring out the window at the winter postcard in front of me.

"There you are," he said warmly, wrapping me in his arms from behind and placing a cool kiss on the arch of my neck. "I wondered if you were here."

"No you didn't," I snapped irritably, shouldering out of his embrace and turning to face him. "You could probably smell me a mile away."

Edward's brows drew together.

"Is something…bothering you, Bella? Have I done something to upset you somehow?"

Looking into his earnest amber eyes I felt that familiar warmth starting to expand in the middle of my stomach. No, it was just going to have to wait. I wasn't ready, not by a long shot, to forgive Edward for lying to me about Jake.

"Recently? We could talk about why you made Alice fly all the way to Jacksonville to babysit me when you knew perfectly well I'd be just fine. Or, hey, you can try and explain why for the past 3 and a half years you haven't bothered to tell me you saw Jake the night Max brought me home for the Winter Bonfire. Or we could try something really novel and you could tell me what you were thinking when you lied to him and sent him away!"

My breath was coming in furious pants, and I wanted to wipe that cool look off his face and stuff it down his throat.

"Is there anything else?" he asked smoothly.

Oh man. If the memory of breaking my hand on a certain werewolf's face wasn't brilliantly clear, I'd have hauled off and slugged him. As it was, I had to content myself with glowering.

"Is there anything else you think I don't need to know?" I returned. Edward sighed softly, his face settling into lines of remorse.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I'm not sorry for asking Alice to keep an eye on you, although I am sorry you viewed it as a hardship. I am, however, sorry for not telling you Jacob had been by, and for telling him you didn't want to see him. I thought it was best at the time. It seemed better to give both of you a quick parting so we could get on with our lives.

"Had I realized you were going to grieve for him as you have, however, I would never have kept his presence a secret from you. By the time I realized I'd made a mistake he was long gone, and I had no idea where to find him."

Best for me. I was getting really, really sick of the men in my life pulling out these heavy handed tactics and making decisions because they thought it was 'what's best for me'.

"You had no right, Edward," I snarled, pushing past him to thump my tea on the counter and grab the downy black parka Renee had bought me for Christmas. "That decision was never yours to make and you know it. Because of your stupidity that night I almost lost Jake for good. You made him think I didn't care about him anymore when you _knew_ I'd have given anything-ANYTHING-to see him again."

Shrugging into my coat I yanked open the front door, bracing myself as the wind slapped fiercely at my face. Edward was next to me in an instant.

"Where are you going?"

"Out." I pushed past him. "I need to not see you right now."

"I see," he said softly. "When will you be back?"

'_Never', _I thought, before pushing the traitorous thought out of my head.

"I don't know. Don't wait up."

"What about Jane?"

Leave it to Edward to play his trump card just as I was getting ready to walk out the door. He'd said he would be willing to play dirty to keep me. I was starting to realize just what that meant.

"The way I feel right now," I said, stepping out into the swirling snow and pulling the door closed behind me, "_Jane_ better watch out for _me._"


	21. Chapter 21

I stormed angrily across the campus grounds, venting my anger on every snowbank and ice-crusted bush along the way. How dare he? He _lied_ to me, he _manipulated_ me, and regardless of what he said (or how bad he claimed to feel) I somehow knew if given the chance he'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Edward had told me he'd been nearly incoherent with joy when Jake disappeared. I probably should have realized then that there was something very, very wrong with this picture. Tossing this new information into the mix I was forced to look at everything in a different light, and I have to say, I didn't like what I saw. Every time Edward had hugged me, every night he'd held me close after yet another nightmare where something awful happened to Jake and no one was there to stop it, every time he'd reassured that Jake would be back sooner or later, he _knew_.

Ten minutes with Jake would have gone a long way toward setting everything straight, and I'd missed out on all of that because Edward was jealous. Suddenly, it was crystal clear, and I was _pissed_.

Of course, when you're trapped between a werewolf and a vampire, there's only one thing you can do. I pulled my cell phone out of the pocket of my thick corduroys (thank you, New Hampshire) and started to dial.

An hour and a half later I was sitting in a booth at Margarita's, a Mexican bar and grill located just off campus, with my old roommate Max and her new roommate Jazmine.

"Oh my god Bella, it was amazing!" Max gasped out, almost choking on a mouthful of tortilla chips, she was laughing so hard. "He had pink goo coming out of his _ears_. It was the worst chemistry fuck up I've ever seen!"

Max and Jaz were both pre-med, and they always had awesome stories about the idiots in their classes. Apparently having tools from both a biology and a chemistry lab at your disposal made for a whole new world of stupid experiments, and it seemed like every year they had someone that had to try everything once.

There were tears running down my face, and they didn't have anything to do with Edward. The two women sitting across the table from me were the best friends I'd ever had. Well, human friends, anyway. Max, at 5'9" with this amazingly spiky black hair (I was pretty sure it wasn't natural), thin frame and terminal goth ensemble looked completely out of place next to the short, petite Jazmine, with her red hair, freckled face and a wardrobe that could have been imported straight out of the 60's. Max was loud, Jazmine was quiet. Max listened to punk rock, Jaz usually had the classical station on.

Men and sex aside, they were the love of my life.

"So tell me Bella, what did Edward do that was so bad you're ditching him on his first day back?" asked Jaz, reaching out and loading up another chip.

"Ugh." I squeezed a lime into a bottle of Corona. "So, get this. You remember my friend Jake, from high school? Apparently he showed up at the Winter Bonfire freshman year and Edward not only didn't bother to mention it, but he actually told him I was too busy and didn't want to see him again!"

The two women gaped at me. Max had been my roommate my first year, since Freshman were required to live on campus, so she knew exactly how tore up I'd been over the whole situation with Jake and Edward. That was how she'd gotten me to the stupid bonfire in the first place-by promising me that Edward wouldn't be there and I'd actually get to cut loose and have a good time.

"Men are such pigs," Max said finally, stuffing another chip in her mouth and trying to talk around it. "If you ask me, we should all just become lesbians and get it over with."

Jaz rolled her eyes.

"I don't think Bella appreciates your liberated world views nearly as much as you do," she said drolly before turning back to me. "I do agree, however, that Edward was being an jerk. I assume you tore a strip off his ass when he got home?"

"Sort of," I muttered, shifting in my seat. "In that, 'I told him I was pissed and knew what he did right before I got my coat and left so I didn't have to talk about it' kind of way."

"Oh Bella, tell me you're not going to let him get away with this," said Jaz, her eyes dripping with sympathy. "Remember, you have to begin as you mean to go on. If you let him get away with dictating to you like this now he's going to do it for the rest of your life."

"Jazzy's right," said Max, reaching over to squeeze my hand. "They only get worse after they get a ring on your finger. I always thought Edward could be a manipulative bastard when he's not trying to be charming. If you let this fly now you're going to spend the rest of your life wondering what else he's keeping from you."

"I know, I know. The sad thing is, with a little perspective (I held up my Corona) I can actually see why he'd think he could get away with it. God, I've been such a little doormat. I just figured…I mean, Edward's so perfect, and I'm so _not_. If keeping him happy meant he'd stay, what was the big deal, right? After all, he only wants what's best for me, right? But now…I mean, I can't see any way that keeping Jake away was what's best."

"Never underestimate a man's stupidity in the face of pure, blind jealousy," said Max in an authoritative voice. "They woo us, they win us, then when they've got us they give up until they think someone else wants us. Then it's all flowers and chocolates and moonlight kisses and 'I'm only thinking of you' until they've got you right where they want you."

Jaz and I both looked at her in surprise.

"Speaking from personal experience there, Max?" I asked lightly.

She shrugged. "Maybe. There was a guy last year I was totally into, but he turned out to be a creepy, controlling, manipulative bastard who would do anything to get his own way. I finally had to turn him in to the cops for stalking before he would get lost."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

I was drenched in guilt. Max was my best friend-well, one of them, anyway-and it seemed like I should have known if something this big was going on.

She shrugged.

"You were in Rio when it happened, and Jaz, you were out in Cali with your uncle. By the time you guys got back it was over. I just…I wanted to forget it ever happened, you know?"

She glanced up, and mischief filled her eyes.

"Now look, you've got me being a wet blanket when we're supposed to be cheering Bella up. C'mon."

Grabbing my wrist with one hand and Jazmine's arm with the other, she dragged us up to the giant karaoke machine in the front of the bar. As the first strains of "At first I was afraid, I was petrified…" drifted through the speakers I grinned, wrapping my arms around each of my friends and settling in to enjoy a night that had nothing to do with vampires, werewolves and ill-fated romance.

Jazmine, thank God, had quickly determined that Max and I were both going to be smashed before we left Margarita's, so she'd stuck to water and firmly declared herself designated driver at the end of the night. That suited me just fine; I could have the bus drop me off to pick up my car tomorrow. We happily rolled on home, belting out song after song on the radio with a carefree abandon that was getting harder and harder to come by these days.

As we pulled into the apartment complex, Jazmine glanced over her shoulder.

"You're sure you don't just want to crash at our place?" she asked.

"Nah, got to go in and face the music sometime."

Impulsively I leaned forward, wrapping my arms around both her and Max and just holding on.

"I love you guys."

From under my arm I heard Max's muffled voice say, "See, I told you you were doing it wrong."

Jaz snorted. "She's going to hate herself for this in the morning. Love you Bells. Call me anytime if you change your mind, all right?"

My eyes filled with tears as I hopped out of the car and started off on the long, slow trek back up the hill to my apartment. There was nothing like a little fiesta music, a talking parrot and taking first prize in a karaoke competition to cure what ails you.

The apartment was completely dark when I stepped inside. I had no idea where Edward had disappeared to, and frankly I was too tired, too drunk and too emotionally wrung out to care. That didn't stop me from screaming in surprise when he blossomed out of the shadows near our bedroom, a phone to his ear and a finger to his lips.

"No, I understand completely. We'd be happy to have her. Just let me know what time her flight's going to be coming in and I'll make sure I'm at the airport to meet her." He paused, listening, then his eyebrows shot up. "I assure you, I'll do my snacking elsewhere," he said dryly, glancing up. "Bella just walked through the door, so I'm going to pass you over to her to arrange the particulars." Another silence, then, "You're very welcome."

He handed the phone over to me. I frowned, lifting the receiver to my ear and hoping I could get through the conversation without slurring my words or falling on my face. Darn Max and her excellent observation that nothing chased down a 3 alarm chili like a cold bottle of beer. I never drank that much.

"Hello?"

"Bella?"

My eyes popped open, my buzz left behind in the shock of hearing Jake's voice at the other end of my telephone.

"Jake? What's going on?" I frowned, glancing up at Edward's cool and impassive face before turning around. "Is everything all right?"

"Everything's fine Bells. Listen, Andy's coming your way on Sunday. Her company's performing at the school, something about the music classes? I dunno, I honestly wasn't paying attention to most of it."

Typical guy, I thought, almost amused until I realized he wouldn't be calling my house at…1:00 in the morning just to give me an update on Andy's schedule. Hell, the girl didn't even like me. He wouldn't be calling me to give me an update _anytime. _As the silence dragged on, my eyes started to droop.

"Sooooo, she's coming here?" I asked, hoping to nudge him along so I could go collapse on the bed.

"Yeah, that's the thing. We've had a bunch of new vamps around here lately. I think it might be connected to your friend Jane. There's nothing else I can think of. One of us has been running Andy back and forth to classes, but I don't want her all the way up there unprotected and I can't close down the shop that long. I was wondering if she could stay with you and….Edward."

He was gritting his teeth, and I knew what it had cost him to have to pick up the phone and ask Edward for a favor.

"Yeah, of course." I didn't even bother asking Edward. I wasn't entirely sure I was speaking to him anyway, and if what I'd heard when I came in meant anything he and Jacob had already come to their own terms regarding her visit.

"Awesome, thanks Bells. I owe you one."

I smiled. "Lifetime of servitude still up for grabs?"

There was a beat of silence, then a warm voice said, "Always" before it hung up the phone, leaving me standing there with a warm, fuzzy feeling that ran all the way down to my toes and Edward silently looking on.


	22. Chapter 22

Sunday dawned clear and crisp, with a biting undercurrent that reminded me quite vividly that I wasn't in Florida anymore. The clock was ticking down, Andy's plane was due in any minute, and I was frantically scrabbling to make sure we had everything she was going to need.

"All right, there's soap and shampoo in the guest bathroom, clean sheets and an extra comforter on the bed and plenty of food," I mused out loud. "Am I forgetting anything?"

"How about this?"

I jumped, Edward's voice startling me out of my introspective list making. There was a man that definitely needed more cowbell. A nice loud one, on a little string, right around his neck.

We hadn't spoken since I got home Friday night beyond "Good morning," "Good night" and "Can you pass the paper?" It was like living in the house with a complete stranger, and I hated it. While I was still pissed, going out with Max and Jaz Friday night had burned off the worst of my anger. The simple fact was, not even Edward could turn back time. I either had to accept the fact that Edward had fucked up and make sure he knew he was never, ever going to do it again, or I had to leave.

Since the second option sent waves of nausea crawling up into my throat, I figured I'd better find a way to make option A work. So I breathed deeply, pasted a smile on my face and turned around.

"What's that?"

He was holding up a small box wrapped in gold paper, and I frowned.

"Is this a bribe?"

"Not exactly," he said with a smile. "This is for you. I owe you so many apologies I don't even know where to begin. The only excuse I can offer up is that I love you, and while I completely understood your relationship with Jacob I found it incredibly difficult to accept the fact that you might leave me one day. I'd just gotten you back from Victoria. I didn't want to lose you again.

"I'll do whatever it takes to regain your trust Bella." He stepped forward, pressing the box into my hands before taking them in both of his and staring pleadingly into my eyes. "You're my reason for existence, my sun, my moon, my stars. Tell me what I can do to make this right."

Hadn't I just been thinking we were going to have to find a way to work this out? I squeezed his hands lightly.

"No more secrets, Edward, no more lies, even if they're lies of omission," I told him firmly. "I can't live like that. I _won't_ live like that. You're going to have to accept the fact that I'm not a scared teenager anymore. I'm all grown up, and I'm perfectly capable of making my own choices, and if you can't deal with that than you might as well walk away **right now** because I refuse to settle for anything else."

I stopped, fear flashing through my mind. Oh God, I'd just given Edward an ultimatum. What would I do if he decided he couldn't cope? What would I do if he left? How was I going to keep that black hole in my chest from opening up and swallowing me whole all over again?

'Snap out of it Bella.' I frowned at my own internal monologue. Was I even listening to myself? Maybe that was Bella Swan back then, but this Bella Swan had come a long way. I wasn't going to settle for anything less than everything when it came to my marriage, and if Edward walked away…well, I had friends. I had a place to stay, and a career looming on the horizon. I would make it.

Survive life without Edward. I was awed to realize that I really could do it. I wouldn't like it, but I could do it.

"You're right," he said, remorse once again swimming in his amber eyes. "You're right, and I was wrong. I don't deserve another chance, but I'm asking…begging…for the chance to make this up to you." He lifted his cold hands from my fingers to frame my face. "I don't want to live without you."

I smiled and kissed him lightly, letting him know he was forgiven. Then I grinned and ripped into the present in my hand. Two beautiful, sparkling diamond teardrops sat on a glossy bed of black velvet, so beautiful they took my breath away.

"Thank you," I breathed, reaching up to brush my lips across his before taking off to the bathroom to slip the earrings in. A moment later Edward stepped into the bathroom behind me, leaning casually against the doorframe with an easy smile on his face.

"Do you like them?"

"I love them." I turned, throwing myself in his arms before pressing my lips against his for a long, deep kiss before we headed to the airport.

Andy's plane was due in from Jacksonville at 2. By 2:10 I was starting to sweat. By 2:30 I was pacing and ranting like a lunatic.

"What if they found her? What if she never got on the plane? What if the plane crashed somewhere in the Atlantic and they're going to spend the next 10 years digging through the rubble to find her body?"

Edward laughed at me. Sprawled in one of the uncomfortable plastic airline chairs with the casual grace of a model, he looked like he didn't have a care in the world.

"Sit down, Bella, her flight's just hit a patch of weather and been delayed. They'll be here in another 15 minutes or so."

"Can you see that?" I asked, desperate to believe that they'd just hit some turbulence. "How do you know?"

"It's on the flight board."

Glancing up at the huge LED screen overhead, I flushed. Sure enough, there was a 45 minute delay next to incoming flights from Jacksonville, with a note beside each indicating they'd hit inclement weather.

"Well, if you want to read…" I said dryly.

Edward grinned, pulling me down into his arms as we waited. I wondered for a fleeting second if I should bring up the issue of Jake again but decided to let it go for now. Andy was going to be freaked out enough about staying with us without adding Edward and I fighting to the mix. Instead I closed my eyes, drifting aimlessly to the elevator music drifting out of the speakers as I waited to hear flight 2057 from Jacksonville had finally arrived.

Dozing must have turned into a full fledged nap, because the next thing I knew Edward was shaking me awake.

"They're here love."

I jerked up, looking around wildly, and slammed my head right into Edward's chin with enough force that he actually stumbled back.

I was pretty sure my skull was broken.

"You know Bella, I'm starting to think I didn't give you enough credit."

Andy stood at the end of our row of chairs, a smirk on her face as I rubbed my aching head. She looked exhausted, her clothes rumpled from the non-stop flight. Jake had refused to allow a layover where she would have been wide open and vulnerable to attack, so the poor kid had sat on the plane for 4 hours with nowhere to go.

"Hey, you made it," I said awkwardly, her angry words in her kitchen still ringing through my head along with the buzzing from my impact with Edward's rock-hard jaw.

She rolled her eyes. "Yep, I'm here, safe and sound. Can we go now? I've had enough of airports for one day."

"Yeah, sure." Then I blushed, turning to Edward. "Andy, this is my fiancé, Edward. Edward, this is Andy."

"I rather assumed she must be," he said, taking Andy's hand and smiling that smile he used when he was laying on the charm. "We're glad you're here. I thought, if it was alright, that we'd stop and grab a bite to eat on the way home."

Andy gave a deep groan of appreciation at the prospect of food, and I had to smile. She sounded just like Jake. Obviously, living in a house full of werewolves had started to wear off on her.

"I'll take that as a yes," said Edward, walking over and picking up Andy's carry-on. "Let's grab your luggage, then we can go find something better to do with our afternoon."

If I was expecting Andy to argue I was doomed to disappointment. Andy smiled shyly at Edward, and I couldn't help a soft swell of pride at how quickly he'd managed to soothe the disgruntled teen. I could tell from the slightly impatient look in her eyes and the careful distance she kept between Edward and herself that she wasn't happy to be there, but she seemed agreeable enough as we sat through dinner. She told us about her students and the performance they were putting on that weekend at the college while she inhaled 3 huge slices of pizza, about a gallon of Cola and a triple-scoop ice cream cone, leaving Edward and I staring at her with just a touch of awe.

Those rumors they had floating around about starving dancers and strictly regulated diets? Yeah, not so much. Andy ate like a…well, like a wolf.

Several hours later we stepped into our small apartment. Edward took Andy's bags back to the guest bedroom, leaving the two of us standing in the middle of the living room alone for the first time since that day in Jake's kitchen. Andy wandered around the room, picking up trinkets here and there, setting them back down. She peered at the pictures I had framed over my desk, smiling when she came to the one of Jake and I.

"I've seen this before, haven't I?" she asked.

"Yeah, it's the same one Jake has in his office."

I walked over to her as she lightly picked it up and stroked her fingers over the glass.

"He reamed my ass the other day you know," she said with a laugh. "Damn werewolf hearing. Told me I needed to mind my own business, let the two of you muddle things out." With a sigh, she set the picture back up on the shelf. "I guess I owe you an apology."

"No, please don't," I said quickly, smiling nervously as my fingers fluttered like a butterfly in the breeze. "You didn't say anything I haven't said to myself a hundred times."

She looked over at me with a quick smile. "Jake's been good to me, and I know you matter to him. I don't know why-no offense-but you do."

"He matters to me too," I said, hesitantly stretching out my hand. "Maybe we could start over? I'm Bella Swan, college student, klutz and general, all around average human."

Andy laughed, squeezing my fingers with her own. "Andy Smithwick, college student, prima ballerina and head gatekeeper at the supernatural zoo. Tell me Bella," she said, throwing her arm around my shoulders and heading for the kitchen, "what do a vampire and a human stock to eat?"


	23. Chapter 23

Andy settled into our household like she was born to be there. Every morning the three of us sat around the breakfast table, Andy plowing through a huge pile of something while I nibbled on fruit and toast and Edward read the paper. He'd drop me off at the elementary school, then take Andy to rehearsals before heading off to his own classes. Each night we repeated the process, picking Andy up from rehearsal and heading home for supper.

It was cozy and domestic, and I couldn't help but think that this is what it would be like if Edward and I decided to adopt-you know, after. Andy took an immediate shine to Edward, pestering him for details from the previous century. He indulged her shamelessly, and if it wasn't for the fact that I knew without a doubt he didn't see her as anything other than Jake's…whatever she was…I might have been jealous. As it was, I was able to just relax and enjoy her company.

Apparently Andy's had been the artistic hand at work at Jake's shop and at the condo, because she announced two days after her arrival that she was taking me shopping for new things for the house. A thank you, she said, for letting her stay. Edward insisted, over her fervent protests, that he be the one to fund the expedition, but he turned over his credit card and complete creative control to Andy.

Oh, what a mistake that turned out to be. We came back that night loaded down with carefully chosen curtains, bedspreads, throw pillows and coverlets in shades of red and black that would take the blasé apartment and its dull, uninspired white paint and transform it into a wonder of modern art. Since Thursdays were my afternoons off, I spent that Thursday unpacking the bags we'd brought home. When I was done I looked around and grinned proudly, spinning happily in my new black leather desk chair.

"Alice would be pleased," said Edward, clearly amused, as he walked into the room. I smiled up at him.

"Tell me about it. She and Andy are like two peas in a pod."

He smiled, but he was obviously distracted.

"Listen, my lab partner just called. He wants to meet at the library in half an hour. I'm pretty sure I'll be back in time to pick up Andy, but if I'm not do you think you could do it?"

I frowned. "Are you sure we'll be safe? I mean, not to state the obvious, but I'm not going to be much good if the Volturi happen to pop by."

Edward shook his head. "I checked. There are no other vampires around for miles, and Alice is watching the minds of all of the Volturi very carefully. The two of you should be perfectly fine, and I'll be home in a couple of hours. Don't worry," he said, correctly reading the doubt on my face, "I wouldn't let anything happen to either one of you. I have no doubt that Jacob would consider tearing me apart purely recreational if I was ever so foolish."

Kissing me goodbye, he grabbed his coat and his car keys and headed out the door.

It wasn't that I didn't trust Edward. I did. But I remembered only too well how Jane had slipped past Alice in the shopping mall that day. It was good to be afraid when the Volturi were around. You tended to live longer that way.

7:00 came and went and Edward wasn't back yet, so I grabbed my keys, bundled up and headed out the door. A tiny voice inside my head told me to just take the car, but I quickly rejected it. The auditorium was just on the other side of the hill behind our apartment complex. The area was brightly lit, with a steady flow of foot traffic from the students who lived there. It would take me twice as long to drive as it would to walk, and the engine would barely have time to start blowing warm air before I had to shut it off again.

'Besides', I thought ironically, 'if we're walking and we find the Volturi they might just give us a wide berth, purely on principle.' According to Edward, everything Andy owned still reeked of werewolf.

The sky was clear and breezeless, and I actually caught myself humming as I came over the crest of the hill. Dartmouth really was beautiful, with its natural campus and the lights in the building glowing like fireflies against the winter night. I was always in such a hurry that I never really stopped to appreciate it. That was going to have to change.

Andy was sitting on the steps outside, staring up at the stars, and she bounced to her feet when she saw me walking across the quad.

"Hey!" she said, surprised. "Where's Edward?"

"Study date." I held out my arm gallantly. "I'm afraid I'll be your escort this evening."

Andy giggled, swinging her dance bag over her shoulder and running down the steps to tuck her arm into mine. "Why Miss Swan, I never knew," she said in a breathy voice, making me laugh.

"Thank you again for letting me stay with you guys," she said as we walked arm in arm across the campus. "I don't think Jake was going to let me come if you hadn't said yes, and I would have hated to miss this."

I smiled, listening to the crunch of our footfalls echoing in the silent darkness. "So rehearsals are going well then?"

"OMG, yes. I was just telling Duke this afternoon that it's going to be one of the best shows we've ever done." She beamed over at me. "You are going to come to the performance Saturday, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," I assured her. "Who's Duke?"

"Duke? Oh, he's this guy I went to high school with. We're sort of seeing each other right now." She giggled, the sound so young and carefree that a stab of envy sliced through me. "Gawd, Bella, he's amazing. He's got these eyes that just…melt you where you stand. And he spoils me rotten. He says I'm his 'raison d'etre'."

"His reason for being," I murmured, flashing back to the number of times Edward had told me the same thing.

"Exactly. It's so romantic. _He's_ so romantic. I'm crazy about him."

My heart broke just a little, thinking about what Embry would say if he heard her.

"So, are you guys making plans for after college?" I asked casually, figuring it couldn't hurt to do a little snooping for my friend.

"Hmmm? Oh, after college? No, unh uh."

Her careless tone of voice, more than her words, caught my attention, and I glanced over at her in surprise.

"No? Why not?"

"Jake didn't tell you? I figured he would have. He thinks it's the funniest thing since the Pet Rock." She smiled over at me, her eyes shining. "I'm going to marry Embry."

Woah. Hold up. I was so shocked by her words that I didn't realize I'd stopped moving until she gently tugged on my arm.

"Bella? Are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, my mind racing. "What do you mean you're going to marry Embry?"

"I mean I'm going to marry Embry. I'm his imprint," she said in a matter-of-fact voice.

"Wait, you _know _about that?"

"Well duh." Her eyebrows creased, and she looked at me as one might a particularly slow child. "I'm not supposed to, of course. Embry's big on not telling me until I'm grown up, letting me make my own choices, blah blah blah. He forgets the walls in that house are paper thin. I overheard him and Jacob talking about it one night."

"And you're okay with that?"

Her soft peal of laughter rang against the snow.

"Bella, have you _seen_ Embry? The way he stutters sometimes when he tries to talk…it's so _cute_! He's always helping someone out. And he's so shy." She rolled her eyes. "He tries so hard to keep me from finding out about the whole imprinting thing that I think if I hadn't heard him talk about it I wouldn't even know he was interested."

A sly leer slid across her lips. "And I have to admit, he's got a great body. That six pack definitely doesn't hurt."

I almost choked, but couldn't really argue with her.

"But…what about Duke?" I asked. "I mean, you said you were crazy about him, and it's no small thing to be someone's reason for living. Are you really going to want to throw that away just because some freaky wolf magic says you and Embry would make great puppies together? And if you are planning on marrying Embry, why are you still with Duke? I mean, wouldn't it be smarter to break it off now, before somebody gets hurt?"

Andy slipped her arm back through mine, gently tugging me forward.

"That's the thing. What Duke and I have…it's amazing. It's like every time I breathe, he breathes. It's almost like he can read my mind, and my heart races a mile a minute when he's in the room. I feel like…well, this is going to sound silly, but when I'm with Duke I feel like I'm with some sort of God, and I'm just so blessed that he chose me."

"That sounds pretty good to me," I said dryly.

"But Bella, that kind of love, that crazy infatuation bordering on obsession that drives you to think about each other every minute of the day…that doesn't last. I have a theory. We only love that intensely once, and it always happens when we're young so that we can learn what that kind of love feels like. But that's not the kind of love you build a future on. Duke and I…I think we would burn each other out, after a while."

She paused.

"With Embry…it's different. It's like I love him too, only not the same way I love Duke. It's not that flash of fire I felt with Duke, but something that just grew, slowly, over time. You have to understand, I was only 16 when I found out Embry had imprinted on me and what that meant, and I wasn't ready for it then. I needed to grow up before I could be worthy of being his imprint, if that makes sense.

"Truth be told, I needed what every little girl needs-time to find my prince, fall hopelessly in love almost overnight and be swept off my feet. To feel that high. But no one ever tells you that while the prince might marry the scullery maid, her family will never be welcome at his table. They never tell you what happens after. Embry and I are destined to be together, I've known that for years, but I needed to love the prince, to feel that flash of passion and heat I have with Duke, so I could enjoy my happily ever after without asking, 'Is this really as good as it gets?' every day for the rest of my life."

A soft, dreamy smile slipped across her face.

"I'll already know."

We walked on in silence, Andy's words echoing through my head. The parallels in our story were obvious, so much so that if I wasn't still 100% certain Andy really didn't want me to hook up with Jake I'd have wondered if he put her up to it. My mind rejected Andy's words, telling me over and over again that there was nothing I was ever going to want more than Edward. Hadn't I known that years ago? But a part of me, that tiny little piece of me that usually sat silent and still in the back of my mind, couldn't help asking.

What if she was right?

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't even hear them until they were almost on top of us.

"Well, well, boys, lookee what we got here."

Andy's arm tightened around mine, the color washing out of her face. There were six guys about my age, wearing polo shirts with the symbol for Kappa Sigma sewn over the breast pocket, and they had us completely surrounded. I vaguely recognized a couple of them from my classes, but I couldn't for the life of me remember their names.

I huffed out a deep breath, incredibly relieved to realize they were just a bunch of boys from the local frat out for a walk. Move along, no bloodthirsty vampires here. I spent so much time hanging out with the monsters that I forgot not all monsters wore a monster's face. My relief slipped away as one of them grabbed Andy, throwing her up against a wall in the courtyard.

"Well now, aren't you a pretty little thing," he said with a leer, nodding for his friends to hold her while he started unbuttoning her shirt.

"Let go of her, damn it," I yelled, running over, only to be grabbed and held back by a couple of burly freshman who looked like they were enjoying this way too much. The man holding Andy had his hand under her shirt now, a hand across her mouth muffling her terror. I viciously bit one of the hands holding me back, desperate to save Andy from the nightmare my carelessness had gotten her into. I tasted blood on my lips before he drew back, backhanding me hard across the face.

As my vision dipped and blurred I heard a deep, throaty growl rolling up from the trees behind us.


	24. Chapter 24

_**Author's Note: All right, so this chapter is based on a scene I've had playing in my head since I started writing this story. (Why is the middle always so much easier than the beginning?) Anyway, I struggled to get this to come out just so, so please, be either brutally harsh in your criticism or incredibly loquacious in your praise. **__** And now, on with the show…**_

A dark shadow streaked past me, barreling into Andy's assailant with silent but deadly force. It rolled with him off the path and into the woods just as two more shadows materialized at the edge of the tree line, hackles raised, fangs gleaming in the moonlight. With a lethal grace completely at odds with their size the giant wolves stalked around the clearing, flanking their prey. My knees sagged with relief as my captors dropped me down into the snow, realizing too late that the hunter had now become the hunted.

Fear washed the arrogance out of their eyes when they realized they had nowhere to run, and a wave of heat swept over me as a wall of snarling, shivering russet fur passed by, almost close enough to reach out and touch.

"Thank you Jake," I whispered, slowly pushing myself to my feet and making my way over to where Andy sat slumped against the wall, hands shaking as she fumbled with the buttons on her shirt.

"Hey, you okay?" I asked softly, brushing her fingers out of the way and finishing the buttons myself before zipping up her parka. She was still shaking, but as I briskly ran my hands up and down her arms I saw that her eyes were clear.

"Yeah." She nodded just a little too hard. "He didn't get a chance to…to…"

Her voice cracked, and I wrapped my arms around her and held her tight as silent tears dripped down her cheeks. The left side of my face hurt like hell, my eye was beginning to swell and both of us were shivering from reaction and cold in the frigid night air, but I knew all too well that it could have been much, much worse.

A moment later the air was filled with the soft, musky smell of pine and fur. Jake came over to where we knelt in the snow and wrapped himself around us like a giant wolfy stole, his supernaturally warm body holding the freezing temperatures at bay. He nudged Andy with his nose, whining softly, and she turned to wrap her arms around his neck.

"Thanks for the save bro," she whispered, burying her face in his thick fur.

The wolf closed his eyes and sighed, leaning his head against hers. I shifted, uncomfortably aware that this whole situation was my fault, but when I moved to stand up and give them some privacy his head snapped back up.

"I'm sorry Jake," I said, not sure what I was going to tell him but unable to swallow the guilt clawing at my throat another second. "This is all my fault. I was the one who…"

The wolf growled, drawing back his lips and, with a flash of fang, effectively cutting off whatever I was going to say. Stretching his neck, just a little, he whimpered as he sniffed the side of my face I was very, very glad I was now too frozen to feel before standing up, murder in his eyes as he scanned the clearing.

The frat boys were gone, and since Jake was with us instead of cleaning up the mess I assumed the wolves had run them off rather than killing them. (It seemed like I should have been more bothered by the thought of the wolves slaughtering humans, but right then it just wasn't in me to care.) Sure enough, a moment later Quil came bounding out of the trees alone, a canid smile on his face that disappeared the minute he saw me.

Damn. Something told me I was NOT going to like what I saw in the mirror tomorrow morning.

"Where's Embry?" Andy asked, her voice barely a whisper on the night air. I realized I hadn't seen him since he had plunged out of the woods and carried Andy's captor away.

Oh. Shit.

By unspoken agreement we ran to where the first shadow had disappeared, the wolves careful not to get too far ahead. I hit the edge of the woods and stopped, chilled to the bone by what I saw. The giant wolf in front of us had the boy pinned to the ground by one gigantic paw, teeth bared, fury and madness blazing in his eyes as they danced a deadly tango. Embry wasn't home, and the wolf wanted to rend and tear at the human that had dared to try and take away what was rightfully his.

"Jake, he's going to kill him!" Andy cried out. "You have to do something!"

The russet wolf looked over at her, his eyes flat and hard, and you could almost hear him asking, "Why?" I realized suddenly that this grown up wolfman was a lot scarier than Jake the Teen Wolf had ever been.

Andy sighed in disgust, the fear that had been on her face only moments before swept away by a wave of pure feminine frustration.

"Are _you_ going to put a stop to this?" she asked, looking pointedly at Quil.

Quil looked back and forth between Andy and Jake a couple of times, then shook himself fiercely before sitting down like a well-mannered lapdog to watch the show.

"Jesus, men," she huffed, squaring her shoulders and starting toward Embry herself.

Jake was in front of her faster than I could blink.

"Get out of the way, you oversized sweater," she grumbled, pushing futilely at his shoulder. "Embry wouldn't hurt me and you know it."

The two wolves eyed each other, and I knew they were thinking about Emily and Sam and how Sam had ripped into her before he knew what he was doing. They both knew Embry would be heartbroken when he came to his senses if he lashed out at Andy the way he was now. With a disgruntled huff, Jake nudged Andy back toward me and trotted over to nip at Embry's flank.

That started a game of cat and mouse the likes of which I'd never seen. Jake would nip at Embry, then dance back out of the way when he lunged. Unwilling to release his prey, Embry's range of motion was limited, and Jake used it to slowly but surely lure his attention away from the body at his feet. After what seemed like an eternity (but was probably only a couple of minutes) Jake started getting through to him. The bloodlust drained from his eyes as he glanced down at the boy, lying on the ground, face white with terror, before his gaze slid unerringly to Andy.

"I'm all right Embry," she said gently, her voice thick with relief. "He didn't hurt me. He was drunk, and he was stupid, but he didn't hurt me. You didn't let him."

It seemed to be what he needed to hear, because that giant paw lifted and the wolf took two careful steps back. His victim sat up, fear still shining out of his eyes as he stared at the hulking nightmare that had knocked him down to size. I was feeling rather smug about the whole thing myself, but Embry wasn't quite finished. He slooooooooooooooooooowly turned toward Andy and then wheeled, lightening quick, to snap his massive jaws inches from the kid's face. Eyes rolling back in his head, the boy flopped back on the ground in a dead faint.

The Quil wolf standing next to me made a choked, coughing sound that might have been a laugh as Embry turned and trotted over to us, mouth open, tail thumping in the air.

"I certainly hope you're proud of yourself," Andy said, trying to sound stern and failing horribly as the wolf sniffed anxiously at her face, her hair and her clothes before burying his nose in her neck. "Ugh! Stop that!" She laughed. "You scared that poor boy to death. I almost felt sorry for him!"

Embry lifted his head and snorted, shaking his head. Before anyone realized what he was going to do he bent down, caught the back of her parka and the waistband of her jeans gingerly in his teeth and took off into the woods with Andy alternating between shrieks and laughter as she dangled from his mouth like a naughty wolf cub.

Glancing over, I realized I was nearly nose to nose with Jake.

"Ohhhhhh no." I recognized the speculative gleam in his eye. "Don't even think about it, mister."

The wolf whined, looking at me piteously before tipping his head to the side, his ears perking up as though he'd heard something that was too far away for my human ears to catch. A second later, he'd dropped to the ground and bellied up to me with a hopeful look on his face.

"What?"

He looked pointedly at his back, then back at me. Oh, he wanted me to…wait.

"You can't be serious. You want me to…_ride_ you?"

The wolf huffed, bumping his nose against the back of my knees.

"Jake, I can't. You're not a horse. What if I hurt you?"

The long-suffering look he gave me said I was an idiot for even thinking it, much less saying it out loud. I had just opened my mouth to argue again (I had a point, damn it) when I felt myself going up…and up…and up, before being set gently on Jake's soft, warm back.

Quil.

The furry traitor flashed his fangs at me unrepentantly as he disappeared into the trees. Before I could slide back down Jake stood up, leaving me clutching at his fur to keep from tumbling off. He glanced over his shoulder, giving me a goofy wolf grin that was completely at odds with the row of sharp canine teeth, and took off after Quil.

If someone had asked me what it would be like to ride a werewolf I'd have said they were a psychotic with a death wish for even thinking about it. I wasn't sure how far off the description was (I did, after all, spend all my time around supernatural creatures that could kill me 3 times before I ever hit the ground) but the truth is, it was nice. The wolf's steps were long and smooth as we glided over the forest floor, taking the long way around to stay in the cover of the trees as we headed back to my apartment. His body heat melted my frozen fingers where they had sunk in to hold on, and as the warmth and the rhythm of his strides began to lull me into a drowsy dream state I laid my cheek on his fur, feeling for all the world like a little girl wrapped snug in my favorite blanket, warm and safe and surrounded by people who loved me.

At some point I must have lost the battle to sleep, because the next thing I knew Jake had stopped and Quil's wolf was standing next to us. Quil carefully scooped me off Jake's back, who in turn set me up on Quil's. He lightly nudged my hands, reminding me I needed to hold on, then melted into the night.

Quil was as warm and soft as Jake had been, but my mind refused to relax and let me drift back off. I found myself sitting up instead, once again admiring the sparkle of the moon on the crust of the snow covered ground as we jogged up the hill to the tree line overlooking my back porch. I expected Quil to drop me off there, had actually opened my mouth to remind him that hallucinogens were only going to go so far in explaining why I was riding wolf-back after dark on a college campus, but the words died in my throat when I saw two shadows moving out of the corner of my eye.

Despite the fact that Quil, with his superior senses, didn't seem concerned, I was determined not to be taken by surprise twice in one night. I peered into the forest black, willing the shadows to take shape. Then those same shadows rolled into a patch of moonlight and, as my breath backed up in my chest, I wanted to take it all back, wanted to close my eyes and have it all somehow be a horrible dream when I opened them back up.

The moon's gentle glow cast the two opponents locked in silent, deadly combat into sharp relief and, frozen with horror, I watched as Jacob's wolf threw Edward to the ground and closed in for the kill.


	25. Chapter 25

There are moments in life when everything becomes suddenly, vividly clear and comprehension washes over you like peace from the Dali Lama. This was not one of those moments. My mind was completely blank as Jacob dove for Edward, lips curled back to reveal deadly fangs, moving at an unbelievable speed…only to yip and fall to the ground, curling into a fetal position only inches away from Edward's now motionless body.

The wolf beneath me snarled, diving through the trees at a blinding speed. I clung tightly to his fur as the trees blew by, the cold air stinging my eyes until the still, frozen figures lying in the snow were nothing more than a watery blur. Wrapped up in trying to hang on, it didn't occur to me until I was almost on them that it was in no way, shape or form normal for a werewolf and a vampire to be lying unconscious in the snow, bodies curled as if to protect themselves from a blow.

Or in protest to extreme pain. Oh hell. There were only a handful of options that would explain the scene in front of me, but it was the most horrifying of these that my mind insisted on playing on repeat. Jane, standing in the trees, watching the vampire and the wolf fight. Jane, using her super vampire powers to inflict unspeakable agony.

Jane, who could no doubt see both Quil and I as we plunged toward the clearing.

Before I could tell Quil to get the hell out of there and let me deal with what was bound to be a _very_ unpleasant scene with a bunch of _very_ unpleasant vampires the wolf slowed, stumbling over the border into the ring the two fighters had been using before he fell to his knees in the snow. I went flying over his head and sliding across the icy surface. A melodious, all too familiar voice came from the shadows to my right, carried on the evening breeze as I slowly skidded to a stop.

"Bella, Bella, Bella. We've really got to talk about the company you keep."

The owner of the voice stepped out into the moonlight, silver crystals of snow glistening in her…red hair?

"Jaz?" I stared in disbelief as my best friend, cloaked all in black, walked over to me and grabbed my hand to pull me to my feet. "What are you doing here?"

Then I remembered the wolves, the vampires and the secrets I had sworn to keep and blanched, not sure how to even _begin_ to explain what had been going on. Jazmine, sensing my distress, lightly squeezed my hands.

"It's all right Bella. I was coming back from picking up some…supplies over at the quad when I heard Edward's voice. I thought he was talking to you. I was on my way over to say hey when I saw him and the wolf going at it." She shrugged. "I thought you might take it a little personally if someone ripped out his throat, so I figured I'd better put a stop to it."

"Wait. _You_ did…this?" I asked, pulling a hand free to gesture at the three bodies now curled in the snow. My mind was completely blank now, struggling and failing to come up with anything that would explain how Jaz, funny, sweet, gentle, shy Jaz, had managed to drop two wolves and a vampire.

"Oh, don't worry, I didn't hurt them," she said quickly, misunderstanding my distress. "I just sort of…unanimated them for a little bit. It's usually used on new wolves when they get too out of control, but it seems to work on vampires as well. I promise, they'll be good as new when they wake up."

"Woah, okay, I have officially slipped down the rabbit hole and wandered into Wonderland," I grumbled, rubbing my eyes to fend off the headache I could feel coming on. Somehow I had the feeling my relationship with my best friend was about to get a whole lot more complicated. "Why am I starting to get the feeling that I'm the only person on the planet that didn't know werewolves and vampires actually existed?"

Jaz laughed, squeezing my hands again. "Oh no, not at all. It's actually not common knowledge-although in truth, they're really not werewolves at all. They're shapeshifters, completely native to the US. Werewolves actually originated in Europe."

Only Jazmine could make the fantastic sound completely logical. I opened my mouth to comment when a soft groan came from behind us. Edward was blinking his eyes, staring at Jaz as if she'd suddenly sprouted a second head. Then he saw me and flew, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me tightly against his chest.

"Oh my God, Bella," he breathed, pressing his face into my hair. "Are you all right? I'm so sorry. I knew none of the Volturi were around. I never dreamed…that is, I never thought…"

"That a group of college guys would be dumb enough to try and start something in the middle of the quad?" I asked dryly. "It's all right. I didn't either. I was actually relieved when I saw them. I was so happy that they were human I never even stopped to think that the monsters aren't the only monsters running around after all. I'm fine, and so is Andy. Jake, Quil and Embry got there right in the nick of time."

Edward gently traced his fingers against the bruising on the side of my face, his cool touch soothing, and I leaned into his hand. Then I frowned, looking around.

"Wait a minute. Where is Andy?" Panic crawled up my spine as I thought of the hundreds of things that could have happened to her. Everything from someone seeing her being carried off by a giant wolf and calling in animal control to Embry losing control and deciding to eat her raced through my head.

"She's fine," he murmured, stroking my hair. "Jacob was…not pleased that I allowed her to be placed in that situation, and Embry has taken her back to their hotel."

"Jake," I glanced over at the still-unconscious wolf. "Edward, what the hell was going on here? Jake looked like he…that is, I thought he…."

Oh God. Bile rose in my throat as I thought about what had almost happened.

"Was going to kill me?" Edward asked dryly. "I won't say the idea didn't occur to him. He made his displeasure very, very clear over the fact that I had failed in my duty to protect both of you. I don't believe he would have actually torn my head off, although he was quite creative in the damage he planned to dole out." A hint of respect came into his eyes. "The pup has picked up a few tricks over the years, I believe he actually had the upper hand when we…"

He trailed off, his eyes narrowing as he looked behind me. I glanced over to see Jaz standing there wide-eyed, looking from Edward to the wolf on the snow.

"_That's_ Jacob?" she said, her voice thick with surprise. "Wow. I mean, I knew Edward was a vampire, but I didn't know you'd added shapeshifters to your list of acquaintances. Although I suppose I should have figured it out. I mean, you did say he was from the Quileute tribe…What?"

Both Edward and I were staring at her now, and she sighed. "As I said, no, you weren't the only one who didn't know about vampires and wolves, but you're hardly the only one who does either."

One of the wolves whimpered and she winced.

"Listen, I realize you probably both have questions, but trust me when I say this is _not_ the place for this conversation. Do you think we could go to your place?"

"And how exactly do you propose I fit two mammoth wolves through my back door without anyone noticing?" Edward asked, his eyebrows arched.

She frowned. "Excellent point. And we definitely don't want to leave them out here for someone to find. This place would be a media circus." She brightened. "If they were in human form, do you think you could carry them back?"

"Absolutely," Edward began, "but as they're both decidedly not capable of shifting by themselves I don't see how…"

"Excellent!" Jaz said, cutting him off. She walked over to the russet wolf, carefully circling his body before bending down to lay her hand on his head. Her fingers stroked the tuft of fur behind one of his ears for a moment before she closed her eyes, muttering something beneath her breath. A moment later Jake's very human, very _naked_ body lay where the wolf had been.

"Holy hell," murmured Edward. I had to agree, although it was an even toss-up whether I was talking about the fact that Jaz had just poofed the wolf out of existence or the fact that Jake looked really, really good in the buff.

'He just tried to eat your fiancé, Bella. Maybe you could drool another time?'

Edward walked over, picking up Jake and running with him to the house while Jaz repeated the process with Quil. Less than 10 minutes later we were all inside, the wolves sprawled out on the floor beneath a blanket that would allow them a modicum of privacy when they woke up. I automatically walked into the kitchen, took down a tin of the tea Jaz liked and set it on to brew. Then I walked over to stand in front of her, arms crossed, looking firmly down my nose.

"What the hell just happened?"

Jaz sighed.

"I know you have questions, and I'm happy to answer them, but the wolves will be awake soon and if you don't mind this is a story I'd rather not have to tell more than once." She glanced at my face, stepping over to grab a bag of peas from the freezer I kept specifically for use as an ice pack and bringing it to me before pressing me down into a chair at the table. "Looks like you've had a night too. Why don't you fill me in while we wait?"

Edward's displeasure was rolling off him in waves from where he stood at the entrance to the kitchen, but since he didn't say anything I did as she asked and told her about Edward's study date, picking up Andy, running into the guys and what had almost happened. Her face paled.

"Thank the gods the hukthars arrived when they did," Jaz murmured, reaching over to wrap her arms around me in a gentle squeeze. "How are you doing?"

"I've had better days," I admitted wryly, squeezing back. Then I frowned. "Hukthars?"

Just then a low moan came from the living room. Quil was sitting up, the blanket pooled around his waist while he held his head in his hands like he'd just finished an all-night bender. He tipped his chin to glance over at Jake, who was still unconscious but had started to stir, then shifted his gaze over to me.

"What just happened?"

I shrugged, glancing over at Jaz, who had circled the table.

"You've got me. Apparently she's the one with all the answers today."

Jaz remained silent, staring at Quil for a moment before walking over to kneel in front of him. He leaned back, his face full of suspicion as she reached out to take his hands and look deeply into his eyes. The two of them sat frozen like that for a long minute, lost in some world that only included the two of them. Then she scowled, letting go and standing back up like her hands were on fire.

"My God," she breathed angrily.

Just then Jake moaned, rolling to his stomach before rising up on all fours and shaking his head. Jaz immediately rounded on him.

"Are you crazy, or just plain cruel?" she snarled angrily, grabbing a throw pillow off of my couch and whacking him with it.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jake asked, glancing at Quil, then at me. Both of us looked back at him, just as clueless as he was.

"I'm talking about you, alpha, and the fact that you've allowed your friend to stay tied to his dead imprint long past the time the unbinding ceremony should have been performed," Jaz snapped. "Do you want him dead? And even if you did, young Claire certainly doesn't deserve to be sacrificed on for your vendetta!"

Quil's head snapped up when he heard Claire's name, and Jaz smiled down at him kindly.

"Claire says hello, by the way, and that it's past time you started letting go," she said.

"What do you know about Claire?" he growled, looking at me angrily as though he thought I'd been spreading tales about his personal misery. I held up my palms. Perfectly innocent over here.

"I know she's trapped, and until you cut the ties that bind her as your imprint her soul's going to continue to wander," she said, glaring at Jake. "Your alpha here should have taken care of that a long time ago."

"Alpha?" asked Quil, looking over at Jake.

"Alpha?" Jake repeated, staring at Quil with a look of horror on his face. Then the rest of what Jaz had said seemed to sink in.

"Wait. How is it you know so much about wolves? And I'm not his alpha. I'm not anybody's alpha. Our alpha's all the way out in Washington, and he's never even mentioned any unbinding ceremony," he said. "I thought once you imprinted, that was it. Sayonara, free will, hello, happily wolfily-married bliss for the rest of eternity."

Jaz frowned, staring from Quil to Jake and back again. Then her eyes widened, and she looked up at the ceiling and groaned.

"Oh boy. You really don't know anything, do you?"

Quil glared at her, his hands starting to shake as he pushed up to his knees. He was obviously hanging on to his control by a thread, and I was suddenly very afraid he was going to phase and completely destroy my newly decorated living room.

"Sit down, pup!" she snapped. Quil plopped back down on the floor, his eyes widening in surprise. I realized with a start that he hadn't meant to do that, which meant that Jaz, my Jaz, my _best friend_, had basically just given him an alpha order. This was getting stranger by the minute.

Jazmine sighed, angling herself so she could see both Jake and Quil and Edward and I, who had come over to lay his hand on my shoulder, before lowering herself to the floor.

"Get comfortable boys. It looks like it's going to be a long night."


	26. Chapter 26

"Why don't we start with who, exactly, you are?" suggested Quil, obviously still fuming.

"Fair enough," said Jaz with a shrug. "My name is Jazmine Running Wolf, of the Oklahoma River Village. Mojave," she supplied wryly when the boys looked confused.

"But…" Jacob frowned.

I knew what he was thinking. With that carrot top hair, snow-white skin and freckles, Jaz didn't look like anyone's idea of a Native American from any tribe, much less one from Southern California. I'd been more than a little surprised when she'd told me her last name too. (Her school papers said Briscoe, exactly, she said, so she could avoid this situation.) She laughed.

"I know, I know, couldn't get any whiter of a white girl if you tried, could you?" she said wryly. "I'm adopted. My real parents dropped me off in a basket at the edge of the reservation when I was only a few days old. The tribal medicine man found me, cared for me and gave me to a couple that hadn't been able to have children. I grew up as part of the tribe."

"And this tribe has wolves," said Jake.

"Oh, we've got wolves, coyotes, pumas, even a mountain lion or two," Jaz said cheerfully. "The shapeshifting gene is extremely strong among my people. Over 75% of the children shift at some point during their adolescence, but it's anyone's guess what they're going to be until they actually do. Parents learn from the time their children are very young what signs to watch for. When one of the teenagers starts showing signs of the change, an alpha takes them out into the desert and stays with them until it's safe for them to come home."

"So wait," said Quil skeptically. "You just tell all of the parents their kids are going to grow up to be animals…and they're okay with that? I thought it had to be this huge secret."

Obviously he was thinking about Embry, whose mother still had no idea that her son had a tendency to go furry.

"Oh God, no," said Jaz, her eyes widening with horror. "Can you imagine what a mess that would be? Trying to hide the signs of the change, and never knowing if someone would be around to help control the change when it happened, and then trying to live a normal life after? A normal family life is next to impossible after the shift, and school? Yeah, until you've got complete control, forget about it. And even then the hunters would have to go days without sleep when the vamps were in town."

Jake's lips tightened, turned down into a frown.

"Oh," she said softly. "I see you know that a little too well. They didn't…prepare you for what was going to happen?"

"No," Jake said grimly. "Nobody told us anything until after we'd phased, and by then it was too late. I almost bit my dad's head off before I heard Sam trying to talk to me."

She reached over, laying her hand over his.

"That's why the alphas take the young ones out into the desert, where they learn to shift and to hunt without any danger to those around them," she said gently. "I imagine it must have been terrifying for you, not knowing what was going to happen."

"That still doesn't explain how you knew about Claire, or how you managed to stop Jakey-boy here in his tracks," said Quil. "Don't get me wrong, I have nothing but respect for anyone that can lay out a bloodsucker and two wolves, but…" he leered at her, "…you really don't look the type."

Jazmine sighed, her face serious now.

"The spirits spoke to me at a very young age, and I started showing certain...talents," she said carefully.

"You're a witch?" Edward said, surprised. I jumped a little. I'd gotten so caught up in Jaz's story that I had forgotten he was back there.

"Shaman, actually. Shamanism is notably different from traditional witchcraft, although no less despised by those that don't know anything about it."

"Wait," I said, frowning at her. "You mean you actually believe you can do…magic?"

Everyone cracked up.

"Bella," said Jazmine, affectionate scorn in her eyes, "I'd think anyone that spends as much time with the vampires and the wolves as you do would manage to say 'magic' with just a little less doubt in their voice."

"Sorry," I muttered in a small voice. It was incredible, but hadn't I seen her yank both Quil and Jake out of their wolf form while they were still unconscious? And she was right. It was hard to believe in werewolves…sorry, shapeshifters…and vampires and not believe in magic, at least a little.

"That's how you heard Claire," Quil murmured.

Jaz nodded.

"She's still tightly bonded to you, and when I touched you she told me what had happened," she said, her eyes gentle. "She's a very sweet little girl."

"Yes, she was," he agreed, his eyes hollow with grief. Jaz hesitated, looking uncertain for the first time that night.

"Quil, how much do you know about imprinting?"

Quil shrugged, but it was Jake who answered. "We know that somehow some wolf magic steps in and makes you go bonkers for the person who's supposed to be best suited for helping you breed the next generation of wolves."

"That's…partially true," Jaz agreed. "Imprinting is actually pretty complicated. The pertinent part is that once a wolf imprints, and the object of his imprint acknowledges his or her affections in return-even a child, such as Claire-your souls are forged together in an unbreakable bond known as the mate bond. So Claire has half your soul, and you have half of hers. That's why what's left of her soul can't go on to be with the ancestors, and why you literally can't go on living without her. Half of your soul is in the earth with her."

"It's always like that when an imprint dies?" I asked, remembering that the wolves would live forever as long as they continued to phase. What happened when their human imprint grew old and died?

"No, not exactly," said Jaz. "Wolves mate for life, so unless there is great need most will choose to stop shifting and grow old with their imprint. Over time the presence of the wolf fades and the bond becomes less intense, more human than supernatural. When time and old age finally break that bond the one left behind will grieve, but they'll grieve as a human grieves.

"But when an imprint is ripped away early, and a strong mate bond severed, the wolf pines. They won't eat. They won't sleep. Most of them die within the year, either from starvation or from going out and picking a fight with the wrong vampire. It's a testament to your strength that you've managed to make it this long," she said, looking at Quil.

Quil looked haunted, staring out at her through hollow eyes. I guess in a lot of ways he was. Claire was dead, and now there was someone in front of him who was telling him that half his soul was _literally_ in the grave and destined to stay there forever. He wasn't going to get better. He wasn't going to get over it. He was just going to slowly and surely go insane until he couldn't take anymore and just decided to kill himself. Unless…

"What is an unbinding ceremony?" I asked.

"Ah, yes. The unbinding ceremony is a ceremony held to disentangle the living from the dead when a mate bond is unnaturally broken," said Jaz.

"Wait, you can just break an imprint?" said Jake, sitting up and looking hopeful. I knew that once upon a time he'd hated the idea of imprinting, hated the fact that it would take away his free will. I guess he never really got over that.

"No, you can't."

Jake's face fell.

"When you imprint your wolf takes your imprint as its mate, and it doesn't let go easily," Jaz said kindly. "The bond cannot be broken while both are alive. After death, however, it is possible, even necessary, for the freedom of the one who died and the continued survival of the one left behind. You separate the mate bond, giving all but a small piece of the soul back to the dead and returning all but a small piece of the soul to the living. That way, you still remember each other, but it's as you do with your first love. You'll always remember them fondly, but you're able to go on living your life."

Silence fell across the room, all of us looking at Quil. His painfully thin shoulders were slumped, shaking with his sobs as he rested his head on his legs. Jaz stood up and walked over to him, crouching down to rest her hands on his arms.

"This should have been done within days after her death, at the same time you returned her body to the earth, so her soul could be free," she murmured. "Continuing to be joined is hurting both of you."

"How do we perform this…unbinding ceremony?" Jake asked.

"It must be done at the place of the binding-in this case, your village," said Jazmine. "The council of Elders must be present, along with your shaman, to permanently break the mate bond. And you, alpha," she looked at Jake, "along with the rest of the pack."

Jake scowled.

"I don't know where you keep getting this idea from, but I'm NOT the alpha. Sam is."

Brows scrunched together, Jazmine reached out to touch his hand, her other hand still lightly resting on Quil's shoulder. She glanced over at me, her eyes widening in surprise, before quickly turning back to the two wolves.

"No," she said slowly, shaking her head. "No, his wolf definitely acknowledges you as alpha. Perhaps because you're so far away from your own pack?"

"Jacob was always meant to be alpha of his own pack," I said, ignoring the glare he gave me. I remembered teasing him about it years ago, calling him "Chief Jacob." It seemed only fitting that fate would hand the position to him sooner or later.

Jaz shrugged. "I don't know. We have many alphas in our tribe, and the sharing of power is a strange thing. Perhaps this Sam gave you his, either intentionally or unintentionally, when he sent Quil away. Or perhaps your wolf bonded with his as alpha out of necessity to keep him alive. Either way Jacob, you've officially got your own little pack."

Jake started to argue, then looked at Quil. His shoulders had stopped shaking, but he still wouldn't look up. Without his clothes on it was easy to see how thin he really was, how desperate his situation had become. Jacob sighed as he surrendered to the inevitable.

"We'll have to go back to La Push to do the ceremony," he said. "The only problem is, we don't have a shaman. Or someone who knows how to do the ceremony, for that matter." He glanced over at Jaz. "I don't suppose you'd be willing?"

"Of course," she said immediately. "We have time off in just a couple of weeks, and we can spend the entire week in Washington. Will that give everybody time to arrange their schedules?"

Jake and Quil nodded.

"Bella?" she asked.

My eyes opened wide.

"I don't…I mean, I can't…" I took a deep breath. "I don't know why you need me there. I mean, isn't this some kind of mystical wolf mumbo jumbo?"

Jacob frowned at me, a touch of hurt in his eyes. Oh crap. Fortunately, Jaz saved the day before I could open my mouth and make things any worse.

"You're right that we don't necessarily need you for the ceremony, but you're a friend and Quil's going to need all the support he can get," she said, glancing from me to Edward and back again like she wanted to say something but was holding her tongue. "It would be good if you could come along."

I nodded slowly. Quil was a friend, a good one. He'd saved me from a sticky situation tonight, and had welcomed me back with open arms even after everything I'd done to them in the past. How could I do anything else?

"All right," I said, forcing some cheer in my voice. "Looks like we're going back to Forks."


	27. Chapter 27

Any enthusiasm I felt about going back to Forks had pretty much disappeared by the time we flew over the Mississippi. I was viciously glad I'd let Edward talk me into letting him buy our tickets, since we were sprawled comfortably in first class rather than the cramped coach section for the six hour flight from Hanover to Seattle. Jaz had grabbed a pillow, tucked herself against the window and fallen asleep almost immediately after takeoff, leaving me sitting next a solemn and silent Edward as I contemplated the strange turn of events that had brought us here.

Andy's last few days at Dartmouth had been-uneventful. In truth, we hadn't seen much of her. Jake was still livid at Edward for what had happened. While no one threatened to kill anyone again (for the moment), Embry did bring her by the house to pick up her things before taking her back with them. According to her, the wolves had more or less kept her under lock and key at the hotel when she wasn't at rehearsal.

Jacob had been painfully polite the last few days they were there, and since painfully polite just wasn't his style I had no idea what was going on. He didn't avoid me, exactly, he was just-never alone. Either Quil was with him, or he was talking wolf stuff with Jaz, or he and Embry were doing something with Andy. Even the night of the performance (which was as phenomenal as Andy said it would be) he had scrupulously wedged himself between Jaz and Quil, leaving me sitting with my head pressed against Edward's shoulder as I tried to think what I'd done wrong.

I finally cornered him right as they were packing up to head back to Jacksonville, catching him in a rare moment without his bodyguards as the other three ducked out to take care of checking out.

"Are you mad at me?" I had asked nervously. Perched on the corner of the bed, fiddling with the thin regulation quilt you found in hotels from coast to coast while he stuffed clothes into a suitcase (it was a really good thing they were all wolves and weren't bothered by the cold), I felt like I was about 5 years old again, but his behavior the past few days had been such a far cry from the warm, affectionate way he'd been treating me since I walked into the garage in Jacksonville and the sweet concern he'd shown me that night on the quad that I was completely baffled.

"Why would I be mad at you?"

His words were innocuous enough, but the way he refused to meet my eyes made me frown.

"Is this another one of those wolf things you're not supposed to talk about?"

"Why's it always got to be a wolf thing, huh Bells? Why can't it just be a Jake thing? Not everything in my life revolves around the pack you know."

It wasn't his words so much as the angry snap of his voice that took me by surprise. He sighed, looking slightly guilty as he sat down on the bed and threw his arm across my shoulders.

"I'm sorry Bella," he said gruffly, pulling me tight against the heat of his chest. "It just seems like every time I finally get away from the pack and things start making sense, something happens to yank me back in. And now your friend Jaz is talking about alpha wolves and responsibilities and destiny. It seems like I just brought everything I was trying to get away from right back with me, and I don't know what to do about it."

I couldn't think of what to say to him, so I wrapped my arms around him and held on tight. He'd squeezed me back with so much desperation that I couldn't help but worry about where he was going to be when this all worked out. It was easy to forget how vulnerable my unflappable Jacob really was.

"You okay?" Edward murmured, leaning down to place a kiss on my forehead and yanking me back to the present.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I tried to work up a smile. "Just a little nervous about going back to Forks under the circumstances."

"What circumstances are those?"

"You know, with the whole imprint thing with Quil. It's going to be a little weird, seeing the pack, knowing they were lying to me about Jake all this time."

Edward shrugged.

"It was a long time ago, Bella. It would, I believe, be most prudent to concentrate on the now."

I scowled at him, sitting up.

"Easy for you to say. You weren't the one who spent all their time worrying about where he was. All they had to do was tell me they'd talked to him and he was fine, but they couldn't even do that."

"Jacob told them not to," he reminded me.

"I know, and I can't really blame him. It's just…it sucks," I pouted, slumping back in my seat.

He smiled, placing a placating kiss on my head as he pulled me against his shoulder. I knew Edward meant well, just like I knew that I couldn't really blame the pack for their loyalty to Jake. It was completely my fault that I, in my immaturity, had chased Jake away. That didn't mean I wasn't going to enjoy being able to see Sam and Emily, and Charlie too, come to think of it, and be able to say, "Look, we're all grown up now. We finally found a way we could all just get along."

There were butterflies leaping in my stomach as I stepped off the plane, Jaz and Edward hot on my heels, and saw Charlie standing with Billy and Quil, Sr. at the entrance to the terminal. Then Charlie glanced over, a huge grin splitting his face when he saw us standing there. Seconds later, he'd caught me up in a tight hug.

"Welcome home, Bella," he said warmly, before blushing and setting me back down.

I couldn't help the broad smile that split across my face as I squeezed him back. Charlie had gotten a lot better about the whole 'touching' thing since the day I first came to Forks.

"Hey Charlie."

I bent down and hugged Billy, who murmured, "Welcome back Bella," then shook hands with Quil, Sr. Glancing behind me I laughed to see Charlie wrapping his arms tentatively around Jaz, who I knew he adored, after awkwardly shaking hands with Edward. He was getting there.

"You both know Edward, and this is Jazmine. So," I said cheerfully, "what did we do to deserve the welcoming committee?"

"Good timing," said Quil Sr. "Quil and the boys are due in any minute. Ran into Charlie in the lobby."

"Speak of the devil."

I turned my head at Billy's words to see Jake, Quil and Embry coming toward us, towering over the crowd. Next to them was just the tip of a blonde ponytail that could have belonged to Andy. Sure enough, as soon as they got close enough to see us the tiny, petite blonde squealed.

"Bella!"

Laughing, I braced for impact as she threw herself into my arms. What can I say? We'd come a long way since the day she'd cursed me in her kitchen. As Andy proceeded to hug both Billy and Quil, Sr. (apparently they'd met-I'm not sure why that surprised me) I turned just in time for Jake to scoop me up into a huge bear hug.

"Hey Bells," he said, grinning. "Missed you."

"Missed you too," I laughed. "Can't…breathe…"

I quickly hugged Quil and Embry, then turned to see Charlie and Billy looking at us with surprise as Jaz did the same.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing!" said Charlie, glancing over at Edward, who was standing there silently watching the scene unfold. He hadn't come over to say hi to the La Push crew, but then, they hadn't threatened to kill each other either. It was probably a first for Charlie. "It's just…good to see you guys getting along again."

"Yeah, well, we're all grown up now," I said with a grin, wrapping an arm around Jake's waist as I remembered my thoughts on the plane. "Can't we all just get along?"

"Ah," said Charlie, looking again at Edward's still, silent face. Next to him, I saw Quil Sr. wrap Quil up in a tight hug as a slow tear dripped down his cheek. I knew Quil had told him about the ceremony. Quil Sr. had to be relieved to find out he was finally going to get his son back. Billy hadn't said a word, but he and Jake had exchanged a look that said they had plenty to talk about on the way home. "Well, that's…nice. Are you guys ready to go? I was thinking we could stop for something to eat on the way home."

"Excellent." I smiled over at Andy and the guys. "Do you guys want to join us?"

"Ahhh…" Embry grimaced, then cast a meaningful look at Jake. Oh, right. For all my goodwill, the men in my life still hated each other's guts. How did I manage to forget that?

"I think we'll pass this time Bells," said the alpha wolf in question, smiling brightly as he pointedly dug his elbow into Embry's ribs. "We've got a lot to do this afternoon to get ready for the…thing."

"Right," said Edward smoothly. "That's still on for tomorrow night, right?"

"Absolutely," he responded, his smile taking on a distinctly feral edge. "We'll be expecting Jazmine and Bella right around sundown."

"Sounds good." I quickly reached up to give Jake one more quick hug, which he returned with interest, before grabbing Edward's hand. We needed to get out of there before Charlie started asking too many questions about why Edward wasn't going with us and Jazmine was. "Jaz and I will see you guys tomorrow."

Slipping my other arm through Charlie's, I smiled a quick goodbye to Billy and Quil Sr. as we walked outside.

The ride home was filled with talk of school and our trip. Charlie asked all the usual questions, and it wasn't long before Jaz had us cracking up with some story about a kid in her bio class who decided it would be fun to make a robot out of one of the frogs from their dissection lab. Nearly gave the teacher a heart attack when it got up and started dancing in the middle of her demonstration!

We'd tried to stick to the truth when we told Charlie why we were coming home. As far as he knew, we were there for a tribal ceremony that was supposed to help Quil get over the depression that had been weighing him down. Charlie knew Quil-Chief Swan knew everyone in La Push-and he knew how hard the past year had been, so he'd taken the news with the same air of relief I'd heard from Sam and Quil Sr. when Quil and Jake had called home to let them know.

The only awkward part of the trip was lunch, when we stopped at an Italian restaurant about halfway home and Charlie noticed Edward wasn't eating much.

"Something wrong with the pasta?" he asked, staring pointedly at Edward's half full plate.

"No, not at all," Edward said smoothly, twirling a fork full of the linguine on his noodles.

"I know you didn't fill up on airplane food," Charlie said, and Jaz and I nearly choked. I didn't even hear what Edward managed to tell Charlie to get him off his back and back to his own meal. I was too busy wondering what Charlie would say if I told him Edward would have rather had the chicken raw.

Ugh. I realized in less than a year that raw chicken was going to sound pretty good. The idea was faintly nauseating.

The sun was just starting to set when we pulled into Forks, and the feeling of homecoming I felt when we pulled into Charlie's driveway was…overwhelming. It was like the old house, with its flaking front porch and aged, dusty windows, had just been sitting here all these years waiting for me to come back. It was silly-I'd just been here last summer. But I'd never felt as at home in Forks as I did right then, sitting next to Charlie with Jaz peering over my shoulder.

"I put the air mattress in your room for you and Jazmine, and there's some pillows on the couch for Edward," said Charlie as we walked through the door, looking so adorably uncomfortable that I had to laugh.

"That's fine Dad."

I knew he lived in constant denial of the fact that Edward and I were living together now. Might as well let him keep his fantasies that Edward and I had never spent the night together under his roof for just a little longer.


	28. Chapter 28

I was exhausted when I settled in for the night. Charlie had left my room alone, only coming in to make sure I wasn't coming home to a blazing pile of dust, so everything was just as I had left it. Jaz, unfortunately, having slept for most of the trip, was bright eyed, bushy tailed and bursting with questions about Forks.

"So," she asked nonchalantly, her voice low as she snuggled into the pillows on her air mattress, "when were you going to tell me about you and Jake?"

"Say what?"

I rolled over to the edge of the bed, frowning down at her.

"You and Jake."

"There is no 'me and Jake'. There never has been," I said firmly, ignoring the little voice in the back of my head that was telling me that wasn't _quite_ true. "We're friends. That's it. End of story."

"Ah."

A moment of silence. Then, just as my eyes were starting to drift closed…

"You're _sure_ there's nothing going on there?"

"Oh for the love of God." I groaned, rolling over again. "What did he tell you?"

"Nothing!" she said quickly-a little too quickly, I thought. "It's just…you two have some serious vibeage going on. Chemistry, you know?"

I rolled my eyes, settling back into my pillows.

"Nope, no chemistry. Not even a single equation. Good night Jaz."

"Night."

At some point sleep must have won me over, because I was dreaming. In my dream there was a soft scritch…scritch…scritch at the window pane before it swung open, pushed by a pair of snow white hands that glittered in the darkness. The vampire stepped into the room on soundless feet, walking around the room, picking up items on my dresser, setting them back down, sniffing at the sweater hanging on the back of my door. He glanced down at Jaz with gleaming ruby eyes, hunger and lust flashing for just a moment before he stepped nimbly around her sleeping form and sat down on the edge of my bed. Softly, he placed his cold fingertips against the back of my neck and murmured, "Bella…Bella…"

"Bella."

I jerked awake, then shrieked when I saw the face floating over me. Fortunately (or unfortunately, as luck would have it) a hand flashed instantly to cover my mouth, muffling my screams so no one else could hear.

Oh shit. Not a dream.

"Shhhhh, cara, no need for that. You'll wake the house, and then I'll have to kill them, and nobody wants that. Now, will you be quiet if I move my hand?"

I nodded quickly, and Alec slowly lifted those ice cold fingers from my mouth with what could only be termed regret. Despite his words to the contrary, I had a feeling Alec wanted to kill everyone else very badly. That I could still hear Jaz's soft breathing and Charlie's deep snores told me that either he was just here for me or someone had him on a very tight leash.

"That's a good girl-but then, you haven't been a good girl, have you Bella?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, raising my voice as loud as I dared. Edward was right downstairs. If I could just lift my voice loud enough that he would hear me…

Unfortunately Alec seemed to know exactly what I was up to, because he chuckled.

"If you're waiting for Prince Charming to come and save you, you're going to be waiting an awfully long time," he offered helpfully. "Edward…stepped out for a bit."

"Is stepped out some kind of new vampire slang for dead?"

All right, so mouthing off to one of the most powerful vampires in the world probably wasn't the smartest thing I could have done right then. It wasn't like I could run away though, and with Edward gone and the wolves firmly confined to La Push to watch after Quil and get ready for the ceremony I was as good as dead if Alec decided to kill me. I figured if I had to go out, I might as well go out with style.

Fortunately for me, Alec seemed to think it was cute.

"Such spunk, you American women," he chuckled. "I'm going to miss that when you're dead."

"So you're going to kill me then?"

"Oh no, not right now." Whew. "But Bella, you've been a bad, bad girl. You're not living up to your half of the bargain. You're still here, and you're…breathing." He smiled, breathing in deeply. "You smell wonderful but, unfortunately, very, very human. The last time we spoke to young Alice we were given to understand the date had been set and you would be one of us now. Aro no longer believes that to be your intent."

My mind scrambled. All right, so the Volturi wanted to kill me because I was still human and I knew their secrets. But if they really thought I was a threat…

"Why didn't Jane just kill me when she had the chance?"

Alec tipped his head to the side, looking for all the world like a curious dog.

"Interesting. Most humans would be begging for their lives right now, and you ask why Jane hasn't already killed you." He shrugged his shoulders. "The simple truth is that Aro likes you, and because he likes you, and because he's always had a certain…_fondness_ for Carlisle…he's willing to give you another chance. Have young Edward change you before the next full moon and we will allow you to live. Fail to do so…"

Alec smiled regretfully, then disappeared out the window so quickly that his last words lingered on the air behind him.

"…and we'll take care of it ourselves."

"Did you hear that?" I murmured softly.

"Yes, I did," came Jazmine's voice from the floor by the bed. I'd heard her wake up earlier and hoped she would have the good sense to continue to fake sleep until Alec was gone. "Was that who I think that was?"

"A member of the Volturi," I said grimly.

Jaz propped herself up so she could peek over the edge of the bed.

"You promised them you'd have Edward turn you into a vampire?" she asked, her voice faintly disapproving.

I shrugged.

"A few years ago I went to their…lair…in Italy. They decided I knew too much. The only way they were going to let me live was if Edward made me into one of them. I was planning on becoming a vampire anyway, so…"

"You were going to turn into a vampire? Willingly? Why?"

Jaz was gaping at me now, and I couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable.

"Edward never ages, and I get older every year. I realized right after graduation that a few years between us wasn't going to make that big a difference, but if we wait much longer I'm going to look like his mother."

"Oh, sexy older sister, at least," reassured Jaz.

"Thanks. But anyway, I'm getting older every year. And right now I'm fragile. Becoming a vampire will take care of that. Edward wanted to wait until after the wedding, but now it looks like the Volturi have kicked up our timetable."

"But what about…" Jaz stopped, looking stricken.

"What about what?"

"Nothing," she said, shaking her head firmly. "Nothing at all. What are you going to do?"

I shrugged, flopping back over onto my back.

"I tell Edward tomorrow I need him to turn me, we take care of it, the Volturi go away. Seems simple enough."

The silence in the room was deafening.

"Bella, are you sure you want to do this? I mean, becoming a vampire…it's a big deal. And you can't undo it once it's been done."

"I'm positive," I said firmly, ignoring the doubts that clouded my mind. "There's nothing I want more than Edward. I know that. I've known that for years. This way, when we say we're going to be together forever, we'll known we mean it. The only difference is…"

A soft moaning sound filled the room, and I realized with a start that it was coming from me.

"What?" There was concern all but dripping from her voice.

"Renee and Esme are going to have to call the caterers."


	29. Chapter 29

Neither Jaz or I slept easy after that, every creak and squeak in the night sending us flying to the window to look for any more late night visitors, so both of us were bleary eyed when we stumbled down to the table the next morning. Edward was nowhere in sight, but Charlie glanced up from his coffee cup with amusement when we threw ourselves down into our chairs.

"Rough night ladies?"

Jaz, who had plopped her head down on her folded arms so that all we could see was the fiery blaze of her red hair over the top of her hooded sweatshirt, nodded, then glanced over at me.

"Rock, paper, scissors for who gets the coffee?"

Obligingly, I popped a fist up. It was an old game she, Max and I often played in the morning when we were too beat to cook breakfast. Jaz was a horrible gambler. Her tells were so bad when we played poker that I didn't even play with her anymore. (Edward wasn't allowed to play either, but for a whole different set of reasons.) I wasn't above taking advantage of it when morning coffee was at stake, however.

Three fist bumps later and Jaz was groaning, getting to her feet to walk to the coffee pot. Charlie smiled after her.

"It's good to see you bringing friends around here again," he said absently. "Don't get me wrong, I _like_ Jake and Alice, and Edward…well, we're working on it. But I was really glad to see you stretching your social circle when you went off to college."

"Yeah, Jaz and Max are the best." I knew that's who he was talking about; the two women had charmed the pants off Charlie the first time he'd come to visit me on campus. I suspected he'd just been thrilled to see me spending time with someone other than Edward at the time; we'd all but lived in each other's pocket for months after Jake left. But Jaz and Max had been bubbling, overflowing with fun and laughter and dragging Charlie out of the house for a front-row view of Hanover and the allure of the local pool hall.

Ever seen your dad hustle pool? I didn't think Charlie had it in him.

Jaz plopped the mug filled with Charlie's steaming Columbian down in front of me, and I smiled weakly when I recognized the writing on the side. There was no end to Alice's amusement with the human obsession with coffee, which apparently smelled like something vaguely resembling mud to a vampire, and she'd bought me the cup as a Halloween joke.

What did it say? "Peace. Love. Vampires." Alice was a trip. I'd laughed when she'd given it to me, but after Alec's visit last night I wasn't feeling the peace or the love from the vampire sector this morning.

"So, what are you girls up to today?" Charlie asked, deliberately avoiding asking about Edward.

Jaz looked over at me, a question in her eyes.

"I'm going to take Jaz over to meet Carlisle and Esme, then we're headed out to La Push."

Carlisle needed to know what was going on with the Volturi, and I needed to lay the foundation for my campaign to get Edward to change me before the wedding. I was absolutely positive that once they knew the Volturi were breathing over their shoulder, Carlisle would be happy to do the job rather than wait for Jane or Alec to do it if Edward continued to drag his feet. I'd prefer Edward, of course, but when you get right down to it the end result was really all that mattered.

"I'm headed down to the reservation to do some fishing with Billy this afternoon. I can take the squad car if you want to use mine to run around in today."

Charlie's offer yanked me back to the very real reality of my lack of transportation. Carlisle kept a well stocked garage, so Edward and I usually just borrowed a car from him when we were in Forks. With Edward gone and no idea how to reach him, however (he hadn't answered any of my texts last night), Jaz and I were trapped.

"I'd appreciate that," I said with very real gratitude. I knew Carlisle would have come to pick me up if I asked, but that would have presented a huge problem when the time came to go to La Push.

He grunted, standing up from the table and walking over to the cupboard. Dropping his coffee cup in the sink Charlie grabbed his spare set of keys out of the cupboard, passing them over to me before bussing a kiss across my cheek and giving Jaz a quick smile.

"Make sure you take Jazmine out to First Beach while you're out that way," he suggested, walking over to the front door where his pole and tackle box stood at the ready. Wow. Tourism advice from Charlie? Maybe Jake was right and hell really had frozen over.

An hour, a shower and a change of clothes later (it was actually colder in Forks than it was in New Hampshire, if that was possible) Jaz and I were in the car and headed out to the Cullens'.

"Are you sure it's going to be all right that you're bringing me along?" Jaz asked, sounding nervous. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye with a frown.

"Yeah, it'll be fine. Alice and Edward love you, what are you worried about?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. I mean, I like them too, I'm just…not used to thinking about a whole house full of vampires as being a good thing." She smiled weakly. "Sorry Bella. Old habits die hard."

I rolled my eyes.

"What is it with people and hating on the vampires?" I grumbled good-naturedly. "You're going to love them. Carlisle's a doctor, you can pump him for all kinds of gross stories to take back home."

Jaz brightened, straightening up in her seat. "Hey, that's right. I always forget Edward's dad's a doctor."

Then something niggled at the back of my mind.

"So, wait. You said you knew that Edward was a vampire all along, right?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, once you know what they are it's awfully hard to miss them."

"Why didn't you say anything before now?"

I was genuinely curious about this one. I knew that as soon as Jake had found out what they were he'd immediately refused to be anywhere in the same vicinity. Jaz had grown up knowing, and she had to have the same attitude toward them as the pack, yet she'd never hesitated to spend time with either one of us. In fact, I would have sworn she actually meant it when she said she liked Edward and Alice. So what was the difference?

She shrugged. "They weren't trying to eat me, they weren't trying to eat you, and no one was turning up missing. I'm easy to please. Besides, it's in the eyes. I've seen vamps with eyes like that before, and they gave human blood a pretty wide berth. If they wanted to try and fit in, who was I to stop them? I mean, it's not like I'm exactly normal either."

Huh. So there were other vampires on a "vegetarian" diet, and they'd popped up on Jazmine's radar. Had to be Tanya and her crew. I made a mental note to ask Carlisle about it later.

We slowly pulled up the Cullens' driveway, more so I could see Jaz's face than from necessity. She didn't disappoint. Her jaw was hanging open as we pulled up in front of the giant house.

"Bella, this place is amazing!" she breathed.

"Yeah," I said, a feeling of pride welling up in my chest. "Esme's one heck of a decorator."

That was all I managed to get out before a streak came flying out the front door and yanked open the door to the car. Emmett swept me up in a huge hug.

"Hell's Bells, Bella, long time no see!"

The joke was an old one, and we both laughed as I squeezed him back.

"Hey Emmett, good to see you." I looked over his shoulder to see Rosalie, Alice and Jasper standing in the doorway. "Hey guys!"

Emmett set me down, and I turned to introduce Jaz.

"Guys, this is Jazmine. She's a friend of mine from college. Jaz, this giant lug is Emmett, and that's…"

"Wait, let me guess," she broke in, her eyes twinkling. "Bella's spoken of you all so much I feel like I know you already. This must be Alice, and Jasper, and you must be Rosalie." She turned back toward me, her eyebrows arched. "You're right. I hate her already."

Rosalie frowned. "Me?"

"Yep." Jaz grinned, walking up to tuck an arm through her elbow. "You have to tell me how you managed to have all that blonde hair and not a single freckle."

"Lemon juice," Rosalie said immediately, thrilled to find a kindred spirit. She turned and led Jaz inside, jabbering away about cucumber peels and bacon masks. I grimaced, turning back to Emmett. He was staring after them in surprise.

"Wow," he said, obviously amused. "I've never seen Rose take to _anybody_ that quickly."

"It's the 'I care about make-up' vibe, I think." Alice really didn't have to worry about it, and God knew I didn't care. Rosalie could go on for hours about the benefits of a proper beauty regime, even though she hadn't been human for years.

"So," I said, grabbing Emmett's hand with a grin and starting toward the house, "not that I'm complaining, but what's up with the welcoming committee? I was expecting to just find Carlisle, not," I waved my hand, encompassing the crew on the front porch, "all of you. Weren't you supposed to be in Alaska?"

Emmett and Rosalie had opted to travel after graduation, and the last I'd heard they were joining a polar bear expedition up north. Come to think of it, Alice hadn't mentioned anything about her and Jasper coming back for vacation either. It was always possible that Edward had told them he'd be in town and Esme had called everyone back-she thrived on being able to mother them all again-but I had a bad feeling there was something going on I was missing.

That bad feeling intensified as the vampires looked at each other, obviously trying to decide how much they were going to tell me. Just then a voice echoed up from the back of the house.

"Are you guys going to let Bella in, or are you going to keep her standing out on the front porch all day?"

Esme appeared in the doorway, beaming, before scampering down the stairs to pull me into her arms with as much enthusiasm (if not quite as much force) as Emmett had.

"Welcome back! Oh, we've missed you so much!" She stepped back, holding me at arm's length. "You look thinner. Aren't they feeding you right? I've got lunch laid out in the kitchen, and there's antipasto on the table in the foyer."

Laughing, I pulled Esme back to me for another hug. She'd filled the holes Renee had left behind for the past few years, haranguing me endlessly about getting enough to eat and dressing warmly and making sure the apartment was well stocked. It was rare for a week to go by without a package from her with something else Edward and I "absolutely had to have." Alice must have told her we were coming, and like any mother the first thing she'd done was spread out the food. It was great to be back.

"Bella!"

Carlisle came trotting down the stairs, pulling me away from Esme for a hug of his own. I couldn't help but compare their warm welcome to the formal greeting I'd received when I first met them all those years ago. Somewhere in the last 5 years they'd welcomed me as part of the family. There were many nights when I wondered if that wasn't half the reason that I couldn't wait to marry Edward. Yes, I loved him, but I loved the family he brought me too.

"I saw your friend come in, but I'm afraid Rosalie whisked her upstairs before I got a chance to do more than say hello," he said with a chuckle. "They were muttering about organic skin treatments when I saw them, if you want her back sometime today you might want to break that up soon."

"No, it's fine." I smiled. "I actually wanted to talk to you guys. I had an unexpected visitor at my window last night, and I was hoping you might know what to do about it."

"Visitor?" Carlisle's brow creased with concern.

"Alec. He came into my room last night, told me if I wasn't turned by the next full moon the Volturi were going to do it themselves."

The collective silence around me was deafening, but the lack of surprise on anyone's face spoke louder than any words ever could have. They'd known this was coming. Then Carlisle spoke, his voice confirming my suspicions and ringing through my head like a portent of doom.

Mine, that is.

"We'd better call Sam."


	30. Chapter 30

Okay, wait a minute. There had been more than once over the past few years when I'd wondered if, "We'd better tell Sam" would be the last words I heard before the pack took me out, but I was kind of expecting to get to become a vampire _before_ they tried to kill me. I mean, preventative measures were all well and good, but come on now.

Alice nodded slowly. "You're right. The pack needs to know it's begun."

"What's begun?" I looked in confusion from Alice to Carlisle's solemn face. "What's going on?"

The vampires looked at each other again, and that same niggling suspicion tugged at the back of my mind.

"Does this have anything to do with that _situation_ you were 'taking care of' over Christmas?" I asked Alice accusingly. Her guilty expression said it all. "You knew the Volturi were coming, and you didn't bother to tell me? Oh, no, no need to tell the little human that the big bad vampires are coming to kill her, we'll just let her be scared to death when they decide to pop up in her bedroom window!"

She shifted uncomfortably.

"I'm sorry Bella. But Edward said…"

"Edward said! What did Edward say? That I couldn't handle it? That there was no reason to 'scare me unnecessarily' when you guys were going to take care of it?" By this point I was snarling. Jacob would have been proud.

"Actually, Bella, what he said was that there was no point in telling you what was going on because it really didn't have anything to do with you," Alice said softly.

"Explain to me how the Volturi deciding to kill me doesn't have anything to do with me, please, because somehow I'm totally missing that part."

Carlisle sighed, gesturing toward the front door.

"I'm afraid it's a little more complicated than that," he murmured. "Perhaps we could continue this conversation inside?"

I glared at him, but really couldn't come up with a good argument, so I obediently tromped inside where Jaz and Rosalie were already perched on the end of the couch. Of course Rosalie would have heard what was going on. Dumb vampires with their super hearing. I flopped down next to Jaz, staring furiously down at my feet. Carlisle nodded to Esme, who disappeared into the kitchen. A minute later I heard her asking for Sam.

Carlisle sat on the edge of the coffee table in front of me, reaching out to tip up my chin so I was looking into his eyes.

"The Volturi don't want you, Bella," he said seriously. "You're merely the pawn they're using as a catalyst in a much bigger game. May I explain?"

"I sure wish someone would," I grumbled, making the corner of his lips quirk with amusement. You couldn't live in a house full of immortal teenagers and not get used to the occasional temper tantrum or two.

"Back in December Alice had a vision that the Volturi were sending scouts to Forks. Somehow they knew about the pack and their capabilities, and they feared they were losing control of this area." He paused. "You know that vampires living together is actually very unusual, and that our family is one of the largest in the United States. Our presence, and the presence of the pack, threatens the Volturi's ability to enforce their will in this part of the country.

"In you, they saw the solution to all of their problems."

"Me?" I squeaked. Somehow knowing the Volturi just wanted to turn me into a vampire was a lot less scary (if not necessarily less painful) than knowing they were using me as leverage.

"Yes, you. You see, the Volturi want to destroy both our family and the pack, but they cannot come out and attack us outright without justification. So they're manipulating the situation in their favor."

"They know about the treaty," Alice broke in. "We promised them we would change you, but doing so is in direct violation of our treaty with the pack. The wolves would attack, and the Volturi would step in and wipe them out with perfect justification. If we don't change you they'll see it as a breach of promise and come after you themselves, knowing that your ties to both Jacob and Edward will bring both us and the pack to your defense. We'll fight, and we'll lose, and the Volturi will hold all the cards."

Spots started to swim in front of my eyes, and Carlisle gently pushed my head between my knees.

"Breathe, Bella. This is why we didn't tell you. The Volturi weren't going to attack without first giving us some form of ultimatum where you were concerned, so there was no point in worrying you before that happened. There was always the chance that the wedding would come and go and these events would be allowed to play out naturally. In the meantime, we needed to come up with a plan."

"That's why you needed to talk to Sam," I said dully.

"Yes."

As if on cue, I heard a dull pounding against the front door. Alice whisked out into the hallway and came back with Sam, Jacob, Jared…and Edward, who immediately came to stand behind me, resting his hands on my shoulders and giving me a reassuring squeeze. I glared up at him, happy to have a tangible target for my anger.

"The Volturi, Edward? Really? And you didn't think it might be nice to clue me in that the world's most powerful vampires were planning on using me to destroy all of you?"

Jacob snorted, and I looked up to meet his light, mocking smile. The amusement didn't reach his eyes, however. In fact, he looked downright pissed. Sam shot him a warning look as Carlisle stood and walked over, holding out his hand.

"Sam, thank you for coming."

Sam nodded his head, shaking his hand briefly before shifting his gaze to me.

"So we've heard from the Volturi."

"Yes, it seems Bella had an unexpected visitor last night."

Suddenly every face in the room was trained on me.

"Perhaps you could tell us what he said please," said Carlisle, his eyes encouraging. "It would help to know the words, to ensure there isn't any confusion."

So I filled them in on what Alec had said, Jaz hopping in to fill in the pieces I missed. By the time we were done their faces were grave, Jake was looking a little green, and Edward's hands had tightened painfully on my arms.

"I know you guys have that whole treaty thing going on," I said, looking at Sam pleadingly, "but you have to see that the easiest solution is simply to allow Edward to change me now."

"No."

Edward's reaction was immediate, and not unexpected. I sighed, patting his hand lightly as I looked up at him. I was going to have bruises there tomorrow.

"You want to wait until after the wedding, I know, but don't you think this is a little more important? This is going to turn into a war, and I don't want anyone else getting hurt because of me. If we just do this now they won't have an excuse, and since we'll be leaving Forks anyway it won't even be an issue."

Edward looked over at Alice, who shook her head softly.

"It's not that easy, Bella," she said gently. "They still hate the presence of the pack."

"But would they be able to find a reason to attack if I wasn't here?" I pushed.

She paused, looking, I knew, to see if she could anticipate the actions of the Volturi.

"No," she said finally. "No, without some kind of direct assault from Sam and the wolves they wouldn't be able to find a satisfactory justification for their actions. The risk of an uprising would be too great."

"See?" I looked pointedly up at Edward, then over to Sam. "It's the only solution."

Sam glanced over at Jake, who was scowling viciously. I could tell from the look on his face that he agreed with me.

"Oh no," Jake snarled. "You can't seriously be thinking about agreeing with this."

"She's going to do it anyway," Sam pointed out practically. "By modifying the treaty to allow it we can prevent any unnecessary loss of life."

"But…"

"Think about it Jake," Sam cut in firmly. "Brady, Connor, Seth, they're still just kids. They're too young and far too inexperienced for the kind of battle we're looking at if we take on these vampires, and from what I understand any other course of action leaves us no other choice. Our first responsibility has to be to the pack."

Jared stood silently, his eyes fixed firmly on a spot on the far side of the room. Jake looked back at me, and for just a moment the desperation in his eyes squeezed my heart. Then his gaze shifted back over to Sam.

"Fuck this," he snapped. "You all can do what you want. If we're just going to roll belly up and let these vamps run right over us without a fight, I'm getting the hell out of here."

He spun around and stormed off, the house shaking viciously as he slammed the door at his back. Sam sighed, shaking his head before pinning me with an accusing glare. I widened my eyes, the picture of innocence. I certainly wasn't responsible for this turn of events, or for Jacob's behavior.

"It's settled then," said Carlisle. "The sooner the better. Tonight, if possible."

"No."

Again, the objection from Edward wasn't a surprise, but the fact that Jaz and Alice chimed in with him was.

"We have other plans for tonight, remember?"

Oh, right. The unbinding ceremony.

"The little shaman is right," Sam said stiffly. "Bella is needed out at La Push tonight."

"What's going on that's more important than the Volturi coming down and tearing you all apart?" asked Rosalie sarcastically. I could tell she wasn't any happier about this than Edward-she'd always hated the idea of me becoming a vampire-but at least she wasn't trying to stop me.

"The life of Quil Ateara." Jaz's voice was firm, and offered no quarter. "It's waited too long already."

Carlisle frowned, his gaze snapping to Sam's.

"Is he ill?"

Dear Carlisle, always willing to put those healer's hands of his to good use. Sam smiled slightly before shaking his head.

"Physically he's….well, I won't say fine, but the sickness is in his soul, not his body. Once that's been healed, the rest will follow."

Carlisle nodded, standing up and offering a hand to me to pull me off the couch.

"Then you two had best get going. If there's anything I can do, please don't hesitate to let me know." Leaning forward, he murmured, "I'll talk to Edward. We'll work this out."

Smiling, I bussed his cheek with a quick kiss.

"I'll see you tomorrow," I said firmly, deliberately not looking at Edward. The wolves silently disappeared out the front door, and I saw a quick flash of fur disappear into the trees. Within minutes Jaz and I had been hugged, kissed and sniffed (thank you, Emmett) and we were on our way to La Push.


	31. Chapter 31

It had been 2 years since I'd been to La Push, but I had made the trip so many times I could have driven it blindfolded. As I pulled into Sam and Emily's driveway knots of apprehension clenched in my stomach, and I fought the urge to turn and drive away as quickly as I could. Once again, I'd come bringing death and destruction to their door. It didn't matter that the Volturi had their eye on the pack already, that I was just the means they were using to reach their end. The bottom line was, I was responsible. Even though I was going to do everything I could to keep the promise I'd made, to never force the pack to stand between me and a vampire, ever again, I knew most of them wouldn't welcome me with open arms.

My anger over the fact that they'd lied to me about Jake seemed small and petty in comparison.

Jaz had been silent the whole trip over. As soon as I turned off the car she'd hopped out, preoccupied, and went to find Sam, leaving me to face the rest of the pack on my own. Gratitude filled my heart when it was Embry who came to stand on the porch, one arm casually slung across Andy's shoulders, both of them wearing a bright smile that told me at least somebody was happy to see me.

"Bout time you got here. Our fearless leader has been foaming at the mouth since he got back from the bloodsuckers' place, but he wouldn't tell us what's going on. Care to fill a brotha in?"

Embry trying to sound like a gangster was like Jewel trying to sing country. Yeah, it could happen, but it wasn't pretty. I had to laugh as I told him about Alec's visit and our morning visit to the Cullens'. By the time I was done, neither one of them was smiling.

"Damn Bella, how do you get yourself into these things?"

I shrugged. "Just lucky, I guess." It was the best answer I could give him. "Hey, have either of you two seen Jake?"

Embry hesitated, looking down at Andy, who raised her eyebrows back. He let out his breath in a quick whoosh of air.

"He's over at Billy's, but you might want to steer clear for a bit. Give him some time to cool off, you know? I think he was actually more pissed than Sam when he got back."

"Thanks Embry, but I can't. Time's one thing I don't have, remember?"

Smiling tightly I turned and headed toward Billy's, leaving Embry and Andy standing on Sam's front steps staring after me.

The forest was cool and welcoming, and I found myself humming again as I tipped my head toward the sun. Sure, the snow covered trees and sharp bite to the air didn't exactly beg you to stand around soaking up the atmosphere, but I'd packed for cold weather and La Push didn't disappoint. We'd be, if not necessarily toasty, at least comfortable with the bonfire blazing on the beach that night.

I'd wondered if I'd have trouble finding Jake when I got to Billy's. Knowing how mad he'd been when he'd left Carlisle's it wouldn't have surprised me at all to find out he'd phased and disappeared. The steady stream of vile language flowing from Billy's back yard, however, told me he was still there, he was still human, and there was a very good chance he wasn't going to be happy to see me.

Well, that was just too bad. By this time tomorrow I was going to be well on my way to becoming an official Cullen, and since I wasn't sure how either one of us was going to react after that happened there was an even better chance that if I didn't see him now, I wasn't going to get to see him at all. He was just going to have to suck it up and get over it.

Nothing could have prepared me for the sight of Jacob, barefoot, in nothing but his cutoffs, pounding his hands bloody on a giant oak next to his old metal garage.

"Jake!" I ran to where he stood, steadily punching his fists into the tree's trunk. "Jake, stop. Stop!"

Gasping (man I needed to get back in shape) I grabbed his shoulder, yanking back as if I could physically pull him away from the self-destruction he was intent on inflicting even though I knew he could have swatted me off like a fly. He did stop, laying his palms flat against the bark and staring dispassionately at the blood running down his arms, but he didn't turn to look at me.

"What are you doing?"

He laughed, hanging his head down so that sweat mixed with the viscous red now running down his side.

"I should think that would be obvious."

"Beating the hell out of this tree?" I asked, completely bewildered. "What did this poor, innocent tree ever do to you?"

Jake's hands may have taken the worst of the impact, but there were deep indentations where his fists had slammed into the bark. I shuddered at the thought of how much force he must have been putting into each hit.

He sighed, leaning his forehead against the tree trunk.

"What are you doing here, Bella? Shouldn't you be off with the bloodsuckers, planning your new birthday party?"

I flinched.

"Quil's ceremony. Couldn't miss it, remember?"

Jake laughed again, but it wasn't my laugh, that sweet, full laugh that had always belonged to _my_ Jacob. It was the same harsh, bitter, disillusioned laugh I hadn't heard since Jacksonville.

"Yeah," he said, straightening up and turning to look at me for the first time. "Yeah, it's nice to know one of us is finally going to get some peace."

He walked past me, headed for the house. I quickly followed behind, only to slam to a stop when he slammed the bathroom door in my face. The shower started running a moment later. Well, hell. At least the shower would clean out his wounds. His supernatural healing abilities would take care of the rest. Since I wasn't going to go away the way he obviously wanted me to, however, what was I supposed to do while he was busy cleaning up?

The answer presented itself immediately the minute I stepped into the kitchen. Billy had been living alone for the past 3 and a half years, and it showed. While there were clean dishes stacked in the dish rack the rest of the room was a mess. I grabbed a cloth and the bleach water I knew was under the sink and set to work.

Half an hour later the kitchen was clean, Jake had finally decided to reappear, and I had managed to work up a good mad. What did he think, he could just beat the hell out of himself and not offer any explanation? That just because my immortality was looming I wouldn't care what he'd done with his? That he could just storm out of the Cullens' the way he had without offering any explanation whatsoever?

"What the hell were you thinking?" I snapped, rinsing off my hands and stomping over to him. I lifted his hands, studying the ugly red scabs running across his knuckles before raising my eyes to his face. "You could have hurt yourself."

"That was kind of the point, Bells," he said dryly. "I needed to let off some steam, and I'd rather hurt myself than someone else."

"That's a stupid point," I grumbled, reaching out and grabbing the tube of Neosporin I'd found on the kitchen table. Gently I rubbed the cream into his hands, smiling when the tension left his body in a rush and he leaned forward to rest his forehead on the top of my head.

"You know, I really don't understand what it is with men and the need to pulverize things," I said absently, rubbing the last of the ointment on the side of his palms before screwing the top back on and lifting my head up. "It's not like it…"

My words trailed off, the breath caught in my lungs by the look in his eyes. It was gentle and pleading and slumberous and possessive all at once, and it made my toes curl as I slowly drowned in it. Without knowing who moved first Jake's lips were suddenly feathered across my mouth, once, twice, their touch so light that if it hadn't been for the brush of his breath on my cheek I'm not sure I would have believed I wasn't just dreaming. A soft moan filled the air, and I was startled to realize it had been mine as I tipped my head, begging Jake to deepen the kiss.

As if he could read my mind he lifted my hands, wrapping them around his neck before his arms slid across my back, gently pulling me closer. The tenderness in his lips quickly became hunger, his hands palming my hips as he held me tight, devouring me, and the need that crawled up and met his was shocking in its intensity. I was going up in flames, burning in Jake's heat, held tight by his strong hands, and at that moment I could all but hear the pieces of my life click into place.

Abruptly Jake tore his lips from my mouth, pressing them against the side of my neck as he rasped "I love you" in harsh tones against the soft skin at the back of my ear. My heart stopped and I stiffened, shocked at what had just happened, even more shocked by the fact that I couldn't bring myself to regret it. Jake felt the change and groaned, his fingers tightening painfully before he slowly unclenched them and let me go.

"I guess this is the part where I say I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, I got carried away?" he asked dryly, his breath still coming in soft pants, his cheeks lightly flushed.

I blushed and he sighed, turning away and scraping his hand through his hair in frustration.

"I am sorry, Bella," he said quietly, his back tight with tension.

"For what?" I asked shakily. "For kissing me or for telling me that…"

"That I love you? That I've always loved you? That you've been the voice in my goddamned head for years, and I don't know how to get you out?" He spun back around, and the bleakness in his eyes almost broke my heart as he reached out and took my hands.

"I made you a promise, do you remember?" His voice was soft and steady, despite the pain on his face. "I promised that I wasn't going to split you in half anymore, and that's a promise I'm going to keep. No more games, Bella honey. I want you to be happy, and while the thought that you're going to hand your humanity over to that bloodsucker on a silver fucking platter is eating me alive, I'm not going to stand in your way if that's what you really want."

He reached up, tracing his fingers along the side of my face as if I was as precious as spun glass. I leaned into his hand and he sighed, pulling my head against his chest and hugging me close. Tears ran down both our cheeks as we stood there and held each other, and it felt so much like goodbye that I thought I was going to die.

Just then a howl split the air.

"That's my cue," he murmured, wiping his face on his shoulder before pulling back to wipe the tears from mine.

"Jake," I began.

"Shhhhh." He put his finger across my mouth, taking it away to place a light kiss where his finger had been. "It's okay Bells. I understand. No excuses, no explanations, no expectations. As far as I'm concerned, this never happened."

Jake smiled a soft, bittersweet smile, then disappeared into the night. A moment later another howl pierced the air, leaving me standing at the door staring after him in bewilderment as I rubbed the taste of him into my lips. I was glad he understood, because I sure as hell didn't.


	32. Chapter 32

_**Author's Note: I'm afraid my familiarity with magic is more in line with traditional witchcraft than Native American shamanism, so for those well versed in its magic and uses please excuse any mistakes I may have made in the creation of the following ritual. **_

The sun was setting and my head was still spinning as I left Billy's and headed for First Beach, where I knew the pack would gather for the ceremony. Jake had kissed me, and there'd been nothing friendly about it. What's worse, I couldn't even work up the will to be upset about it. Being in his arms had been like coming home, and I hadn't felt any of the guilt I'd felt the first time we kissed on the cliffs all those years ago. What did that mean?

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't hear the people arguing on the path in front of me until it was too late.

"Have you lost your mind? Why on earth would you do something so stupid?"

"Have I lost _my_ mind? He practically had his hand on your ass, and you're asking if I've lost _my _mind?"

Coming around the corner I saw Andy and Embry standing nose to nose, glaring at each other.

"He most certainly did not," she bit off, "and even if he did I fail to see how that's any of your business."

Embry growled, almost incoherent with rage. Andy's arched eyebrow, so reminiscent of Jake's, was only egging him on, and I almost opened my mouth to tell her to be careful when I realized they hadn't seen me yet.

"You can't see how it's any of my business. You're flirting with a wolf that's too young to have any control or sense, and you can't see how that's any of my business."

"Oh, come on," she scoffed, throwing up her hands. "I highly doubt he was going to phase and eat me with Sam standing right there. You're the one who went completely nuts. You almost put that poor kid through a wall! What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking he had his hands on you, and that's not where they belong!"

Cheeks flushed with anger, Andy leaned forward and poked him in the chest.

"And what exactly makes you think that wasn't exactly where they belonged, hmmm? Or that his hands were anywhere I didn't want them to be?"

"Because you're mine, damn it, and in this case I don't particularly care what you want!"

I slapped my hand over my mouth, absolutely certain I was turning purple trying to hold in my laughter. This ridiculous argument could only mean one thing. It looked like Embry had finally had enough of playing big brother.

"Yours, huh? Funny, you couldn't swear it by me," she snapped back. "Not once in the two years I've been living with you have you _ever_ acted like I was anything other than Jake's little sister. So what, exactly, is supposed to make me believe that you feel _anything_ for me other than some misplaced brotherly affection?"

Embry snarled as he yanked her into his arms, tugging her head back with a hand firmly fisted at the base of her neck.

"There is absolutely nothing brotherly about how I feel about you," he said, eyes hard, before his mouth came crashing down on hers.

I smiled as Andy melted, wrapping her arms around his neck to return his kiss with interest. Something told me Duke's days were numbered. If Quil's ceremony went half as well, it was going to be a day for happy endings.

'For everyone but Jake' my little voice reminded me. I scowled. 'We aren't talking about Jacob right now.' 'Why not?' 'We just aren't.' 'If not now, when?'

Was I really having this argument with myself? Shaking my head, I turned around and headed back toward Billy's. I didn't want to interrupt the couple in front of me when it looked like they were finally getting it right.

By the time I had navigated an alternate path to the beach it was well after sundown (thanks, lack of direction) and the bonfire was already blazing. The tribal council, including Quil Sr., Billy and Sue Clearwater, was holding court, telling stories to a bunch of the village children. The pack was there, of course. I smiled when I saw Sam and Emily, jaw dropping at the toddler on Emily's hip and the bump beneath her winter parka that said number 2 wasn't far behind.

On the far side of the fire Jared and Kim were sitting with Paul and Rachel, and as I watched Embry and Andy wandered over, hand in hand, to join them. All four of them welcomed Andy with hugs and smiles. I felt a sharp pain as I realized just how completely she, as Jake's "little sister" and Embry's imprint, had been welcomed into the pack.

"Bella! How's it going?"

Seth Clearwater beamed at me, handing me a can of my usual Cola.

"I'm good Seth, thanks." I popped the top, grinning before pulling him into a one-handed hug.

"I'm glad. Listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Jake," he said earnestly. "Sam ordered us not to."

"It's all right." Trying to be mad at Seth was like kicking a puppy dog.

"I just wanted to say thanks for introducing Quil and Jazmine. She's amazing. She and Sam have been closeted up all day talking about all of this shapeshifter stuff. Said it was amazing we hadn't managed to run ourselves into extinction by now with as much as we didn't know."

Way to be diplomatic, Jaz. She must have been taking lessons from Max.

A sharp whistle brought my attention back to the bonfire. Jaz was standing between Sam and Jake, and my jaw dropped again as I realized she was decked out in full ceremonial gear. I had to admit, part of me hadn't believed her when she'd talked about her "calling", but that night she looked every inch the part. Apparently there was a lot I still needed to learn about my best friend.

"If I can get everyone to circle around the fire, we'll go ahead and begin."

The tribal council sat on one side of the fire along with two people I didn't know but turned out to be Claire's parents, with the pack gathered together on the edge. I was surprised when Jaz insisted I sit next to Jacob, who apparently now occupied a place of honor as second pack alpha. (Which, come to think of it, would explain why he'd been at the Cullens'.) Before I could ask what was going on, however, the drums began to beat.

The ritual was beautiful, strangely exotic in its unfamiliarity. Jazmine threw a handful of herbs into the fire that burned with the scent of the forest before lighting a smudge, circling Quil and chanting in a native tongue. When the pack picked up the chant along with her I realized she was speaking Quileute rather than Mojave, which was probably why she'd spent so much time either cloistered in or on the phone with Jacob and Quil the past few weeks. Then she handed Jake and Sam a bowl with some thick, viscous liquid in it, which they used to paint Quil's face and chest.

Jacob looked oddly different tonight, standing as head of the pack with Sam in the firelight. As I watched the flames flicker across his face it seemed like the world narrowed down to just the two of us, and my heart flipped suspiciously, traitorously, in my chest in a way I didn't want to think about too hard. It was painfully clear, here among his own people, that the Jake I'd known as a teenager was all grown up, and the man he'd become was as amazing as I always knew he would be.

Suddenly the music settled into a slow, steady rhythm, and Jaz came to sit on the ground in front of Quil. Reaching out, she took his hands, then closed her eyes, lightly swaying as she spoke. I didn't understand a word of Quileute, but my breath caught in my throat as Claire's image was suddenly crystal clear sitting on the ground next to Quil. As I watched the little girl stood, walking over to wrap her arms around him and place a quick kiss on his cheek.

"Thank you Quil," the spirit-girl said, smiling, before she disappeared.

The drums grew silent, a slow tear dripped down Quil's cheek, and Jazmine opened her eyes.

"It is done."


	33. Chapter 33

The difference in Quil was amazing. He smiled and laughed as he horsed around with Jake and Embry in the shallows, his eyes dancing and free of the shadows that had haunted him since I'd first seen him again. Every once in a while I would catch him staring at the spot where Claire's ghost had sat and a touch of sadness would slip over his expression, but it was different from the soul-sucking emptiness I had seen there before. You could tell he was going to be all right.

I looked over with a grin as a smiling Jaz flopped down beside me, looking much less mysterious and other-worldly in a pair of jeans and her battered parka. She reached over and plucked a hot dog off of my plate with a mischievous smile.

"Thank God you always load up on extra food. I thought I was going to starve to death trying to get to the table."

Jaz had been hugged, kissed and cried on by just about every member of the tribe, including Sam and Quil Sr. My heart swelled to bursting with pride for my friend.

"That was pretty amazing," I commented, passing her the soda I was sipping off of.

She took a long swallow, moaning in appreciation.

"It needed to be done," she said simply, slanting me a look out of the corner of her eye. "So what's up with you and Jake?"

I shifted uncomfortably.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Uh huh. You two are usually in each other's pockets when you're together, but you've been circling each other like a pair of wary cats all night. So again, what's up with you and Jake?"

Did I tell her? On the one hand, she was my best friend, and I was going to explode if I didn't tell someone about our strange interlude at Billy's house. On the other, Carlisle was expecting me tomorrow. It wasn't like anything was ever going to come of it anyway, no matter how many strange and unusual feelings I now had.

Oh, screw it. What were best friends for, right?

"Jake tried to beat the skin off his hands, kissed me, told me he loved me, then said he wasn't going to stop me from becoming a vampire if it would make me happy right before he disappeared to come up here."

Jaz arched her eyebrows, chewing for a moment in contemplative silence.

"I was wondering how long that was going to take," she said finally. "Personally, I thought he'd do it a whole lot sooner."

I gaped at her.

"You knew this was coming? And you didn't warn me? Some best friend you are!"

"Chillax, Bella," she laughed. "I didn't know for sure, I just figured it was. A blind man could see he was still crazy about you."

"Not like it matters," I said morosely, scooping a chip off my plate and dancing it through a pile of dip. "After tomorrow he's going to hate my guts."

"Is that the only reason you're holding back?" she asked cautiously. "Because of this stupid promise you made the Volturi?"

"Yes. No. I don't know." I sighed. "There's also the whole imprinting thing. Even if we did get together, one of these days he's going to find a girl and imprint on her, and then it's going to be all over anyway. Why set myself up for that kind of heartache?"

Jaz snorted, staring into the fire as she polished off the rest of my hot dog.

"Trust me on this one, Jake imprinting is the last thing you have to worry about."

I frowned.

"What are you talking about?"

Jazmine eyed me pensively, and I could almost see her weighing the pros and cons of cluing me in. I really needed to have a talk with my friends about this whole "keeping things from Bella" thing they had going on.

"You probably ought to know," she finally decided. "I wasn't going to get involved, but you really should know all the facts before it's too late to change your mind."

"Change my mind about what?"

"Becoming a vampire."

She squinched up her nose the way she did when she was trying to decide where to start.

"Imprinting is…complicated," she said finally. "Jake was right when he said it was how a wolf chooses a soul mate, but that's not all of it. See, when the human phases for the first time the wolf is born. It's always been there, just under the surface, but it doesn't really_ exist_ until right then. Shapeshifters have a very strange duality thing going on.

"Anyway, because a wolf's instinct is to mate, the wolf immediately begins…looking around, I guess is the best way to put it. It's like there's a piece of them that's missing, and they go looking for the one person who can fill that piece up. Remember, wolves aren't human. A person can date someone a couple of times, decide they don't like them and move on. Because wolves mate for life, they're very picky when they're deciding who that mate is going to be.

"Once a wolf chooses a mate, the human imprints. That way they're brought together, and there's no chance of the human letting their mate get away just because they don't realize that, say, their perfect match is the girl standing behind them in line at the grocery store. Does that make sense?"

"Sort of," I said slowly. "So basically the wolf picks the mate, then imprints the human to make sure they go along with it. "

"More or less," she agreed. "The wolf has very little consideration for the life the human left behind when they're choosing a mate. I've seen imprinting rip entire families apart. It can get pretty nasty."

I nodded, thinking of Sam and Leah.

"Usually the wolf picks a mate and expects their other half to go along with it, but sometimes, in very rare cases, it's the other way around," she continued, smiling over at me. "Sometimes their human self is very much in love when they phase the first time, and their heart is so steady that the wolf takes a look at their choice and considers them for a mate. Your Jake, he has a very steady heart."

"Wait. Are you telling me that Jake _imprinted_ on me and he didn't tell me?"

"No, not at all." All right, now I was lost. "Imprinting is meant to bring two mates together, Bella. If their human half is already in love, and the wolf decides to accept their choice as a mate, imprinting isn't necessary. There is no empty piece to fill, so the wolf never tries. Jake's mate bond-it's old, and it's strong."

"So you're telling me that Jake just sort of…skipped imprinting?"

"That's exactly what I'm telling you," she said easily. "That's why I asked you what was going on between you guys. Solidifying a mate bond like that requires some pretty major acknowledgement from both of you before that's possible."

"But I never…" Then I stopped, my jaw dropping open as I remembered a kiss and a battle and telling a broken-hearted boy that I loved him. Jazmine looked at me knowingly.

"I thought so."

"Does Jake know about this?" I asked abruptly, suddenly wondering if he had been knowingly hiding this from me the whole time because he knew I would flip out if he told me he had some kind of strange, wolfy claim on my future.

"Maybe. Maybe not." Jaz shrugged. "Normally I would say yes, but this pack's so clueless about all things imprinting I'd say it's entirely possible Jacob just thinks he happens to be in love with you."

"But…but…Carlisle's supposed to turn me tomorrow," I said in a small voice, my mind still desperately struggling to process. "What's going to happen then?"

Jaz sighed. "_If_ you decide to vamp out, once you were dead we could perform an unbinding ceremony." She paused. "Bella, you know I like Edward, so please take what I'm about to say the way I mean it. You should think very, very carefully about what you're giving up. When wolves are bonded as tightly as Jake, it's very rare for them to be able to live without their mates. If you had asked me when he first left, I would have said he wouldn't last the year. That he managed to survive 3 and a half years without you, that he's actually managed to run a business and build a life for himself and Andy and take care of Quil rather than pining away, speaks volumes for how strong his feelings for you really are."

She reached over to squeeze my hand.

"I don't know Jake well enough to tell you how good a boyfriend he'll make, or a husband, or a father," she said earnestly, "but I can tell you from the bottom of my heart that you've got yourself one hell of a wolf, and that he loves you very, very much to willingly put himself through the kind of hell he's been going through just to make you happy."

"So you're telling me Jake's been alone, all these years?" I asked, starting to feel slightly numb around the edges. Jaz's warm laugh took me by surprise.

"Well, I'm not promising he's reached 40 year old virgin status," she said dryly. "Whatever else he is, he is still a man. I can tell you, however, that if he ever did go out with someone else, she didn't matter. It was your face he saw, not hers. Like I said, your Jacob has a very steady heart. I'd think twice before I threw that away."

"That lying scumbag!"

Jaz and I both turned around quickly to see Leah staring at us, an expression of horror on her face.

"Who, Jacob?" Jaz asked, her brow scrunching in confusion.

"No, Sam," she snarled. "You're telling me that if a human's in love when they shift their wolf will let them choose their mate?"

"Sometimes," Jaz said cautiously. "It's the exception rather than the rule, but it has been known to happen."

"You see? There it is." Leah looked smug, then her face crumpled. "He was lying to me the whole time."

"Who was lying to you?"

"_Sam_," Leah snarled. "Thanks for paying attention."

"Wait," said Jaz. I could tell the light was starting to dawn. "Are you telling me that you and Sam…?"

"All through high school," confirmed Leah miserably. "Then he dropped me like a hot potato when he imprinted on Emily. And now you're telling me that the only reason he dumped me was because his heart wasn't _steady_ enough for his wolf to pick me."

Jazmine stared at Leah for a minute, then burst out laughing.

"Oh, that's great," grumbled Leah, turning to walk away. "Thanks a lot for the sympathy."

"Wait!" Jaz scrambled to her feet, jogging over to catch Leah by the wrist before she could storm off. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make it seem like I was laughing at you. It's just…oh my God. A she-wolf and an alpha wolf? I would have paid to see that, just for sheer entertainment value."

Leah looked at her oddly, and Jaz sucked in air as she tried to catch her breath and explain.

"When a wolf chooses its mate, they're looking for the yin to their yang-someone who's going to balance out their natural tendencies and bring them peace. Wolves are, by nature, very volatile creatures, she-wolves and alpha wolves even more so than others. I don't know what happened with you and Sam before the shift, but I can tell you that even if his wolf had wanted to mate with you yours would have told him to go straight to hell."

The other woman frowned.

"So you're saying _I_ rejected _him_, I just didn't know it?"

"I'm saying it's possible," Jaz agreed, her face serious now.

She frowned, then smirked.

"Nope, doesn't make it any better."

I felt horrible, staring at the heartbreak in Leah's face. Apparently Jaz saw it too, because she said, "It's been hard here for you, hasn't it?"

Leah jerked her shoulder restlessly. "It's all right. Nothing I can't handle."

Cautiously, Jaz laid a hand on her arm. The older woman looked over in surprise, and I found myself wondering how many times Leah had had a hand raised to her in kindness in the past few years. It was easy to be turned off by the giant chip on her shoulder and forget that underneath it all was a seething mass of raw, boiling hurt. Mouth twisting to the side, Leah stared into the fire. As the flames danced in the shadows of her eyes and flickered across her dark hair I was surprised to realize that she was actually very pretty when she wasn't busy being scary.

"She-wolves are rare, and they're treasured by my tribe," Jaz said gently. "If you wanted to get away, switch packs, even for a little while, I can guarantee you'd be welcomed with open arms."

The offer must have startled Leah, because she stared at Jaz with her mouth hanging open for a minute before she sighed, looking back toward the fire.

"It doesn't matter," she said bleakly. "Sam will never let me go. Says I don't have enough control yet. Personally, I think he just likes keeping me under his thumb."

"Sam is a good man, and a great alpha," said Jazmine, and I could tell she was choosing her words with care. "I have no doubt that if you truly wanted to go, he would let you go. But even if he didn't…well, no matter how great an alpha Sam may be, he's still just a babe in the woods compared to the alphas of our tribe. I promise you, if you wanted to leave, we would make it happen."

Leah's eyes filled with tears, and for a horrible moment I thought she was going to cry. Then she sniffled them back, giving Jaz a watery smile.

"Thanks for that," she said. "I don't know if I'll take you up on it, but…thanks."

As Leah turned to walk away I glanced over and saw Jake staring at us from across the fire, one eyebrow raised in question. Standing up, he started walking across the sand toward us. The flames from the fire cast shadows across the sculpted muscles of his legs and chest as he moved, and I heard Jazmine sigh as she sat back down next to me and grabbed a pickle off my plate.

"Oh yeah," she murmured wistfully, staring at Jake. "That is one hell of a wolf."


	34. Chapter 34

"What did the she-devil want?"

Jake grinned as he dropped down into the sand at my feet, reaching out to snag a chip from my plate.

"All right, will you two stop swiping my food?" I grumbled good naturedly, completely taking the sting out of my words by holding the plate a little closer to him. "Between you and Jaz I'm going to starve to death in the middle of a giant bonfire with enough food to _literally_ feed a pack of wolves."

"Sorry," he said, unrepentant as he grabbed another chip off my plate and looked over at Jaz. "Thanks again. Seriously. We'll never be able to repay you for bringing Quil back to us. Although if you could have managed to make him just a little less of an asshole in the process…"

Jaz laughed, standing up and brushing sand off of the seat of her pants.

"Sorry hot shot, you're on your own there." She looked over at me. "I'm going to go check in with the man of the hour, then see if I can actually grab some pie before these pigs eat it all. You want anything?"

"Nah, I'm good."

"Cool. Hey, don't forget you're my ride home, all right? And think about what I said."

With a pointed look at the man next to me she took off to find Quil, leaving me sitting alone with Jacob for the first time that night.

"Soooo…great party," I offered.

He grinned. "I have a feeling this is going to stretch on all night. Everyone's so glad to see Quil back to normal they're afraid to let him out of their sight. Want to jump ship, take a quick walk?"

Ummm, maybe this wasn't such a good idea. He must have felt my hesitation, because he gave me that huge, warm smile that I loved.

"No expectations, remember Bells? Just two friends taking a break from all the merriment to check out the stars."

Feeling foolish, I stood up, dusting the sand off my own pants and slipping my fingers through his. There were eyes all but burning into my back as we walked away from the fire, but I didn't care. Or rather, I tried not to care. This might be the last night I had with Jake, the last memory I had to cling to of our time together when I was still human. Even if Sam decided to nullify that segment of the treaty it would certainly be the last time I ever came to La Push. There was no way the pack was going to welcome a newborn vampire into their midst, not after going up against Victoria's army. The thought made me unbearably sad.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you that too much thinking is bad for your health?"

A light giggle slipped past my lips at Jake's good-natured teasing.

"I dunno, you ought to try it some time. Might be surprised by how it turns out."

"Are you implying I never think?" he asked, pretending to be insulted.

"I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that the average dog had a maximum IQ somewhere in the general vicinity of a 2 year old. You know, food, toys, sleep, more food…"

Jake laughed. "Doesn't sound so bad."

It really didn't. Walking along the beach holding his hand, I wished desperately that food, sleep and toys were the only things I had to think about. If they were I wouldn't have this invisible countdown hanging over my head as I raced to offer up my humanity to stop two mortal enemies from trying to wipe each other off the face of the earth.

"Are you scared?" he asked softly, proving once again that he wasn't as oblivious to what was going on in my head as he sometimes seemed.

"A little," I admitted, glancing over at his knowing face. "All right, a lot. After all this time I thought I'd be ready for this, but I'm really not. I thought I had a little more time to just be…Bella."

"You don't have to do this, you know," he said, very studiously not looking at my face. "We can figure something out."

At that moment, I wanted to believe him. My heart thudded with the realization that if I had the choice I would choose to stay human just a little longer, spend just a little more time with the people I loved before I had to say goodbye. Unfortunately, the time for changing my mind was long past. I sighed, squeezing his fingers tightly as I laid my head on his arm.

"You know how there are some roads you start down and there's no turning back? I'm about 100 miles down one of those roads, Jake. I never had a choice, not since the day I stepped into that courtyard in Volterra."

Jacob opened his mouth, looking like he wanted to argue with me, then snapped it shut as he peered into the darkness.

"Vampires," he whispered, a soft breath of sound as he pulled me back into the shadows behind a huge boulder. "Stay here." He quickly ducked around to the other side, and a moment later I saw a huge, furry shadow slink along the edge of the sand and slip into the night.

The minutes ticked by as I sat huddled behind that rock, praying to any god that would listen that Jake was wrong. The Cullens wouldn't cross the treaty line, and if they had for whatever reason they would have come straight to the pack. If there were vampires skulking around out there it was a pretty safe bet they weren't on our side. It suddenly occurred to me that there was something I could be doing besides sitting here waiting to die. Pulling out my cell phone I shot a quick text to Jaz, tucking it under my coat to hide the light. Crossing my fingers that she had her phone on her and she'd understand, I slipped deeper into the darkness. Moments later Sam's familiar howl split the night, followed quickly by the rest of the pack as they headed away from the bonfire toward the beach where Jake had disappeared.

The cavalry was on its way. I just hoped it wasn't too late.

The silence was thick, and no matter how hard I strained I couldn't hear anything moving in the darkness: man, beast or vampire. My legs began to cramp from tucking myself back in my hiding spot, and my feet were freezing. I had just about decided that the pack had forgotten about me and run the intruders halfway to Canada by now when a mournful wail pierced the air. I knew that sound, had heard it at the top of the cliffs the day I broke Jake's heart. I didn't even stop to think before I ran out of my hiding place, heading toward the steady chorus of voices being lifted in song from the far side of the beach. A horrible feeling of déjà vu rushed over me as I tripped and stumbled in the sand.

The pack stood in sharp relief against the moonlight, massive bodies circling a still, dark form lying on the ground. Bile rushed up the back of my throat as I pushed my way through, squeezing between their mammoth frames to reach the russet wolf bent over the motionless figure. My mind screamed in denial when I broke through to the center, falling to my knees beside Jake on the frozen beach, but even before I reached out a gentle hand and turned the body over I already knew. The empty wheelchair lying on its side, wheels still spinning from its occupant's desperate flight, said it all.

Billy Black looked back at me with sightless eyes, his blood seeping in a dark, steady stream into the sand from a gaping hole where his throat used to be.


	35. Chapter 35

Murder is always messy business, even when you know who your killer is. Even though we knew Billy's murderers would never serve time behind bars there were authorities to notify, reports to be filed, an autopsy to conduct. At some point the clouds swept over the starry sky and a drizzle poured over the beach at La Push, turning a bleak night into a damp, rainy morning. It seemed only fitting that even the skies would weep at Billy's passing.

The pack had all shifted back, preparing for the onslaught of police and the inevitable media that always followed a gruesome killing. Charlie was first on the scene, pulling the cruiser onto the edge of the shore, the blue and red of his flashers casting an almost surreal atmosphere over the whole scene. His shoulders had slumped as he stepped out of the car and walked over to Billy with slow, weighted steps. That afternoon the two of them had been laughing together on Billy's fishing boat. Now one of them was dead.

I'd walked over to him, wrapping an arm around him for support as he'd stared at the body of his friend. We didn't say a word. There was nothing you could say in a moment like that, and so we'd stood and shared that moment together before Charlie stepped aside and Chief Swan stepped into his shoes.

Members of the village had come and gone throughout the night, first to bring clothes to the pack, then to offer Jacob their support before they'd gathered their families and gone home. Charlie spoke to each of them by rote; the answers were always the same. They didn't know why Billy was on the beach, or who might have been chasing him. He had mentioned needing a moment of privacy, but no one knew if he'd stepped out to tend to some bodily need or if he'd simply needed a moment to clear his head.

Through it all Jake stood there, back braced against the wind and the rain as he kept watch over his father's corpse. His eyes were dull and glazed with shock, and while Emily had pushed some food into his hands and he'd eaten I'd have wagered good money he didn't have a clue what it had been. Before the EMTs loaded Billy's body onto a stretcher to take him to the morgue he'd leaned forward, closing his eyes and saying a quick prayer before stepping back and allowing them to take him away.

Charlie had spoken with him briefly, but Jake hadn't been able to tell him any more than anyone else. We'd been walking along the beach, he'd heard a noise, he'd gone to investigate and found Billy lying on the sand. Charlie'd given his shoulder a quick squeeze and suggested he go on home. Someone from the department would call him if and when they knew anything more. He'd pulled me over and privately asked me to make sure Jake made it home and got a meal in him before I left. Jaz would stay with Sam and Emily in the meantime.

Finally the crime scene technicians had come and gone, the media had filmed their fill and the crowd had disbursed, leaving just Jacob and I on the deserted shore.

"Hey," I murmured softly, wrapping my arms around him and tilting my head back to look in his face. "Are you ready to go back?"

He was silent, and I wasn't sure he'd actually heard me. I was getting ready to repeat the question when he nodded slightly, stepping back and grabbing my hand as we walked the familiar path back to Billy's. He didn't speak, and I didn't press him. There would be plenty to say later on. The police could search their fill, but I knew justice for Billy's death would ultimately lay in the hands of the Cullens and the pack.

Andy and Embry were waiting with Paul and Rachel back at the house. As soon as we came into view Andy came flying down the steps, launching herself at Jacob as she sobbed into his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around her, pressing his cheek into her hair as she cried, his fingers clenching on mine when I tried to step away. Rachel stood silently next to Paul, her face unnaturally still as the three of us walked up the front steps, and I gently extricated myself from Jake's grip so he could wrap his other arm around her.

Tears burned in my eyes as Billy's children clung to each other and wept, and I gleefully condemned the Volturi straight to hell for the pain they had caused.

Unable to do anything for the three of them right then, I walked inside and headed to the kitchen. I'd promised Charlie I'd get Jake to eat before I came home to check on him, and it was a promise I intended to keep. The beauty of family, however, is that you're never alone when things go horribly, horribly wrong. Emily and Jaz were already there, bustling around as they made a huge breakfast of bacon and eggs, and I slipped in and around them as easily as if we did this every morning of our lives as the rest of the pack ebbed and flowed around us.

Once breakfast was done and the dishes were cleared, I was at a loss. Charlie was probably home and could no doubt use some fussing himself, but Jacob hadn't spoken since we'd left First Beach and I was worried. Even though my logical self told me he wouldn't be alone, everything in me screamed at me to stay and make sure he was going to be okay. It was Andy who came out in the kitchen to reassure me and send me on my way.

"We'll be here for him, I promise," she murmured as she pulled me into a tight hug, "and Sam's going to need him soon. You go take care of Charlie."

Jake had clung when I went out to hug him goodbye and I nearly changed my mind before he let me go, dredging up a wan smile before placing a kiss on my forehead.

"Goodbye Bells," he'd murmured. I was halfway back to Forks before I remembered that today, goodbye meant so much more. Billy's death had washed away the details of the previous day, but it all came rushing back as I slowly drove away from La Push; the Volturi's ultimatum, Jacob's kiss, Jazmine's startling revelation and, above all that, Carlisle's promise that today would be the day.

The realization that Jake's last memory of me would be me walking away and leaving him to mourn Billy alone was my breaking point. I pulled over to the side of the road and wept, for Billy, for Jacob, and yes, for myself. It seemed that I was destined to keep leaving Jake just when he needed me most.

Charlie wasn't home when Jaz and I returned to the house, but Edward was waiting out front. Without a word he walked down the front steps and gathered me into his arms.

"Charlie's at the office. I heard about Billy," he said gently, stroking his hand down my hair. "Are you all right?"

The question brought on a fresh bought of tears as it finally hit me that Billy, who'd been a part of our family for longer than I could remember, was really gone. Edward held me silently as the rage and the grief poured out of me in torrents, leaving me limp and hollow in his embrace. When the storm had passed he stepped back, pulling a handful of handkerchiefs out of his pocket and pressing them into my hand.

"I had a feeling you'd need these."

Hysteria bubbled up as the thought of Edward bringing _me_ a handkerchief blended with the hollow expression on Charlie's face as he realized it hadn't been a mistake and the memory of Jake, Andy and Rachel clinging to each other as they mourned the loss of a vital member of their family, and I laughed until the tears flowed again as Edward stared at me with just a touch of panic on his face. As I wiped my eyes I realized that Jaz had retreated quietly into the house, offering Edward and I a few precious moments of privacy.

"I know it's a lot to ask right now, but Carlisle would like you and Jazmine to come out to the house when you're ready. We're expecting Sam and the pack this afternoon."

More tears welled up as I thought about Jacob being there when the Cullens took the step that would make me a part of their family.

"I can't, Edward. I just...I can't. I don't want him to be there when…to see…"

I trailed off, but I knew Edward had understood.

"Bella," he said carefully, tucking a strand of hair back behind my ear, "I think we both know that Billy's death was no accident. Unless Sam very much surprises me, war with the Volturi is no longer going to be optional. It's going to be inevitable."

The thought of the pack…no, the thought of Jacob, Quil and Embry, and Seth and Brady and Connor, who were still so achingly young…going up against the Volturi was the last straw for my already queasy stomach. I ran to the edge of the woods just in time to lose what was left of my dinner from the night before, retching until there was nothing left and dry heaves drove me to my knees. Edward gently brushed the hair back from my face, not in the least perturbed by the revolt from my very human body.

"This is no longer about you," he murmured. "As I said, unless Sam very much surprises me, the decision has already been made. That means that we are no longer on an accelerated time frame in terms of your…transformation."

It took a moment for it to sink in, but when it did my legs went limp and I collapsed on the ground at Edward's feet. Whether I became a vampire or not, Billy's death would be the catalyst that would push the pack to step over the line. My immortality was now immaterial. Sweet relief rushed through me as I realized that I was being given a choice after all, followed closely by tidal waves of guilt. With war with the Volturi upon us, the last thing I should be feeling was relief over being given a reprieve.

"It's okay, Bella." Somehow sensing my conflicting emotions, Edward strove to reassure me. "You believed you had months left of your human life, not merely days. Relief is perfectly natural. And in truth, regardless of what happens with the Volturi it would be safer not to have you in the throes of the transformation for the next several days."

"Am I a horrible person for being happy I have more time?" I asked softly. "I do want to be with you, and it just…it feels wrong that I should be happy about the fact that I'm pushing all of this back."

"You couldn't be horrible, Bella, even if you tried." He placed another light kiss on my forehead before he eased me to my feet. "Carlisle indicated that time was of the essence, which I assume means he wants us there sooner rather than later. Do you believe you and Jazmine will be up for it?"

"A giant tri-species powwow on how to wipe out the most dangerous vampires on the planet? I wouldn't miss it for the world."


	36. Chapter 36

Despite Edward's words the pack was waiting for us when we got to Carlisle's, their huge frames draped on, in or under every available surface in the Cullens' living room. The giant room seemed tiny by comparison, the air stiflingly hot as we slipped along the back wall to where the other Cullen siblings sat as far away from the hot-blooded wolves as they could get. The chilly hand on my spine nudged me forward and I entered the room on autopilot, my eyes instinctively searching for the face I knew had to be there, somewhere.

There…sitting with his knees tucked up on the floor at Quil's feet, his flat, predatory gaze pinning me in place like a butterfly beating its wings desperately against the glass walls that hold him down. For a moment I couldn't move, couldn't even breathe. It was as if I was swallowed whole by the intensity of that stare. In that moment I understood how the rabbit feels when it's face to face with the wolf, desperate to escape, knowing there's nowhere to hide that it won't be found. Then a noise from the other side of the room caused his eyes to flicker, just for a second, and the moment was gone. Shaken, I turned my head and followed Edward to the stairs.

Alice gave me a quick, flickering smile, but it was obvious her attention was held by the two men standing in front of the picture window. Carlisle, strikingly blonde, trapped forever in the prime of his youth, and Sam, who could only be described as tall, dark and deadly, heads bowed together like schoolboys exchanging secrets.

"They killed one of our own, on our land," snarled the alpha wolf, standing back to give Carlisle a condescending glare. "This insult is an outrage and will not be tolerated."

"I agree that it's unlikely that Billy's death was an accident, but a direct attack against the Volturi at this juncture is highly precipitous and unlikely to end well."

Trust Carlisle to be the voice of reason. Paul, who was seated on the couch between Jared and Seth, laughed snidely.

"That's a pretty big word for an old guy. Now I've got a word for you-kick their collective asses. That's exactly what we're going to do when we get our hands on those bloodsuckers, just like we did their little newborn army the last time they came to town."

"Don't let the fact that they chose to attack the weakest of you lull you into a false sense of security," warned Carlisle.

It happened so quickly I would have missed it if I hadn't been watching. One moment Carlisle was frowning at Paul like a displeased father, the next he was against the wall with Jacob's shaking hand at his throat.

"Billy wasn't weak."

Rage had dilated his pupils until they swallowed the iris, glittering pools of black that promised madness and mayhem. Edward tensed beside me, Emmett leaned forward with a hiss, and the wolves braced themselves on the edge of their seats for the brawl that was sure to follow. Sam reached out and caught Jake by the shoulder, but before anyone could move any farther Carlisle stilled them all with a wave of his hand.

"Billy Black was one of the finest men I have ever had the privilege to know," he said gently, lowering his hand to lightly squeeze the shoulder Sam held. "I am sorry for your loss. But the simple truth is, his disability made him a victim. The Volturi are, first and foremost, predators, and they are nothing if not practical. To them, he would have been an easy kill."

Jake's eyes flashed, and for a moment I was afraid his wolf would leap out and tear Carlisle to pieces. Sam must have been thinking the same thing, because he cautiously let go and took a couple of steps back. Looking around, from the eager wolves that all but trembled in anticipation to the vampires that were poised to strike, I realized all of the occupants of this room were primed for a fight. The tension of the morning, combined with the furor over Billy's death and the age-old rivalry that stood between them, had created an unstable situation that was going to combust at any moment.

I couldn't stand it anymore. Shaking my hand free of Edward's grip I rose, stepping down off the stair I had perched on to slip like a shadow through the enraged wolves. I saw Edward stand to stop me, only to halt when Quil growled threateningly.

"Bella love, come back here."

The urgency in his voice slipped past me as I continued, dodging around arms, legs and feet with unusual grace, so focused on the angry wolf in front of me that each step took on a surreal, dreamlike quality. As if from far away I saw myself reach up, sliding my hand along Jacob's arm to the thick wrist that held Carlisle captive. A gentle squeeze and those fingers relaxed slightly before letting go completely, convulsively squeezing my fingers as he brought our hands down to his side. A slight tug and he backed away from where Carlisle stood still, watching him with an unwavering calm that said he never for a moment believed Jacob would carry through with his threat.

From the collective whoosh of air that echoed through the room behind us, I suspected he was the only one.

Without saying a word Jacob walked back to his spot on the floor, tugging me down and holding me to him with a desperation that testified to just how superficial his control really was. My arm wrapped involuntarily around his waist and my head found his shoulder of its own volition, never for a moment considering the propriety of cuddling my best friend in my fiancé's home. Jacob needed me, and however unfortunate the circumstances I had been given the unexpected gift of time to be there for him. In that moment, that was all that really mattered.

"There is another matter to be considered," Carlisle continued, as smoothly as if the interruption had never taken place. "We have no way to be certain that the Volturi were responsible for Billy's death."

The silence in the room exploded into shouts of outrage, and Carlisle held up his hands placatingly.

"I admit they are the most probable suspects, but unless we can prove their guilt any retaliatory action will be viewed as a direct and unprovoked attack. The Volturi will undoubtedly use that to declare war against the pack."

"Those sneaky sons of bitches. That's what they had planned all along, isn't it?"

Heads turned toward the stairs at the sound of Jazmine's voice as Carlisle nodded unwillingly.

"It's very likely."

"We can't let them get away with it."

Oops. Had I actually said that? I must have, because now 23 pairs of eyes were glued on me. Oh well. In for a penny…

"I'm the only one in this room that doesn't have some kind of freaky, mystical powers. Couldn't you guys, like, do some kind of supernatural CSI thing or something?"

They were kind enough to give my stupid statement the moment of silence it deserved before they cracked up.

"Supernatural CSI, Bella? Really?"

Paul snickered, poking Seth in the ribs.

"Hold on while I go get my pretty blue jacket."

Rolling my eyes, I turned to see Jake smiling down at me. All right, so it had been a dumb idea, but laughing at me had shattered the tension in the room. That was worth a little humiliation. Glancing over at the stairs I met Jaz's laughing eyes, then Edward's serious gaze. He was looking from me to Jake with an expression on his face I'd never seen before. If it had been anyone other than Edward I would have said he was jealous, but that was ridiculous.

Wasn't it?

Only Sam and Carlisle had remained silent, allowing the merriment to roll around them.

"She's right."

Sam's voice caused them all to shut up quickly enough, heads snapping around to stare in disbelief. The pressure had obviously pushed him to the point where he'd finally flipped his lid. But no, that was Carlisle's head nodding in agreement as he looked out at the ragtag bunch gathered in his living room.

"The wolves should be able to track the scent and match it to the Volturi if one of them was responsible, and Edward, you should be able to tell if they were involved. Alice, do you see anything that might give us a place to start?"

Heads swiveled again to stare at the pixie on the stairs, who after a brief glare at Paul (who had been miming obnoxiously behind Sam's back) obligingly closed her eyes.

"I see…four of them standing under a tree," she murmured. "They're talking…Caius has a sword, the same one he used to fight the wolves in Europe. They're preparing for battle."

"They know we're coming."

"Edward is right. They're expecting us to come in force, and they'll be prepared for that."

Carlisle turned to Sam.

"If we can prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that one of the Volturi was responsible for Billy's murder, you are well within your rights to demand their death in return. The others will not act against you. It would be dishonorable."

Someone guffawed loudly.

"An honorable vampire? That's like a low-cal Slurpee; nice to think about, but you're never gonna find it."

The crack of a hand connecting with the back of a rock-hard skull echoed through the room. Sam stood glaring balefully at Paul, who was rubbing his head in disgust. Carlisle's lips twitched, but he didn't say a word. Neither did anyone else. Paul had had that coming for a long time.

Jacob gave my fingers a light squeeze before he stood up.

"Seth, Leah, Embry and I can go down to the beach and see if we can trail whatever killed Billy. Alice, do you think you can get us to the Volturi once we have their scent?"

Alice hesitated, then nodded.

"I think so. I recognize the place where I saw Caius. There's a small town nearby, that's likely to be where they are."

"And what about the rest of us, oh great one?" joked Quil, looking just a little miffed that Jake hadn't chosen to bring him along.

It wasn't often I got to see Jacob blush, and I laughed as a tinge of red crawled across his cheeks. He was obviously still adjusting to his new place in the pack.

It was Sam who answered.

"The rest of us will go back to La Push and wait to hear from Jacob."

There was some grumbling, but the room cleared out pretty quickly after that. The wolves who hadn't been included in the hunting party disappeared into the woods, probably to grab a nap and a bite before the evening's festivities. I was surprised to see that Jaz, after a quick word with Jacob (who had quietly apologized to Carlisle), had decided to join them.

"She packs a whammy," Jake said as I stared after her, completely baffled. "I asked her to come with us when we confront the Volturi."

"I'm coming too."

"Absolutely not."

Edward's voice carried across the room with such a wealth of disapproval that I flinched.

"Still trying to protect her, bloodsucker?"

"Better than getting her killed." He reached over, laying a possessive hand on my back. "Or have you forgotten that the Volturi have already come after her twice?"

I stepped out of his reach, instinctively curling into Jake as I glared at him impatiently.

"They don't want me dead, they want me vamped, remember? And you were the one who said it didn't matter anymore."

Edward opened his mouth to argue with me, but it was Jacob's hand that spun me around.

"Bella, what are you talking about?"

Fear raged with hope in his eyes as his gaze flicked desperately across my face, and guilt raised its ugly head when I realized that even with everything else that was going on, he'd still been worried about me.

"The only reason to change me today instead of waiting until after the wedding was to stop the Volturi. Now…it doesn't matter anymore."

I cringed, realizing how cold that sounded since it had been his father's murder that had made my immortality unimportant, but Jake just yanked me against him, one hand cradling the back of my head, holding me tightly against his chest as he laid his chin on my hair. A shudder ran through him as I lightly ran my hands up and down his back in an effort to reassure him that I was still here.

"So," he finally said, trying for levity as he stepped back, "you're staying more or less human, huh?"

"More or less," I agreed, amused.

Edward reached out, curling an arm around my waist.

"Bella love, Charlie is probably home by now. I should take you home."

Slowly I nodded, my eyes still glued to Jake's as Edward led me out the door.


	37. Chapter 37

"This sucks."

I smirked as Andy repeated herself for the fifth time in as many minutes. She was being handed a crash course in the hardest part of being the only human surrounded by a batch of supernatural creatures; being left at home to worry and wonder while everyone else flocked to the fight.

"They should be back soon."

"Not nearly soon enough," grumbled Rachel.

Emily nodded her agreement, barely glancing up from the baby booties in her hands. Beside her Sam Jr., the toddler I'd seen at the bonfire…was it really only last night?...slept happily, his thumb stuck in his mouth as he enjoyed the sweet innocence of youth, where the monsters under your bed really are make-believe and your Daddy is the biggest, baddest monster killer you know.

Then again, in Sam Jr.'s case that might very well be true.

Embry and Paul had shown up with the girls and little Sam in tow not long after Edward had dropped me off, claiming they didn't want them left alone out on the reservation. If the quick flash of gray fur I saw slipping through the trees meant what I thought it did, what they _really_ meant is that they wanted all of the women out of the way and they were leaving us together with Leah to make sure it happened.

"There's got to be something better we could be doing than sitting here with our thumbs up our…"

"Andy!"

"What?" She glared at me. "This whole "leave the little woman at home" thing is archaic. I think this afternoon alone set women's lib back 20 years!"

Jake's sister laughed.

"I think it's more of a 'leave the little human at home so she doesn't become a snack for the big, bad vampires' thing," she pointed out practically. "I, personally, am perfectly okay with that."

"Aren't you worried about Paul at all?"

I couldn't fathom how anyone could be so calm, knowing that the man they loved was planning to go head to head with creatures that made my worst nightmares look tame. My stomach was in knots knowing that both Jacob and Edward were out there, somewhere.

She shrugged.

"Paul can take care of himself. Besides, it's not like he's going to be the one challenging said big, bad vampires if it comes right down to it, and Jake can take out a vamp with his eyes closed and one paw tied behind his back."

Just then Leah burst through the door, her eyes glowing triumphantly as she wrapped her arms around Rachel and spun her around the room.

"They got him!"

"They got who?"

"The bloodsucker! What's his name…the strange one…Caius. That was it. Traced his scent to the beach _and_ caught it on Billy's body. And Edward caught him thinking about it. They've got him cold! Hot damn, that Italian leech isn't going to weasel out of this one!"

The two women jumped around the room, laughing like loons. I grinned, thrilled to hear that Billy's killer would be brought to justice. Then Rachel's words finally sunk in.

"Wait…what happens now?"

"Now Jacob's going to kill him."

My horror must have been written all over my face, because Leah sneered.

"Don't tell me you're going to pick _now_ to get all sentimental about the vamp. He killed Billy, he deserves to die."

"No…no, I agree." My voice was dazed. "It's just…why Jake?"

Rachel looked at me, frowning.

"Jake's his son, and the alpha of the pack. Well, one of the alphas, anyway. It's his right to demand retaliation for Dad's death. He and the leech will fight, he'll kill him, and we'll all live happily ever after. What did you think was going to happen?"

"I guess those stupid vampires didn't learn the first time, because they're headed back to that clearing again-you remember, the one where we killed all the trampy vamp's undead spawn?" Leah cackled gleefully, but if she said anything after that I didn't hear her over the sound of the door banging closed at my back. I had to get to Jake before he got himself killed.

The trip to the field took forever, each second flashing another image of Jake's body, mauled, maimed or worse, far worse, bitten, held prisoner by the vampires' toxic venom as he died a slow, painful death. The final mile racing up the edge of hill was murder, my lungs burning, my legs screaming as I ran, pushing myself farther than I had in years.

'If I live through the rest of this day,' I thought wryly, 'I am so going to join a gym.'

Finally the clearing came into view and I tumbled out of the trees, gasping for breath. Strong arms caught me before I hit the ground.

"Bella? What are you doing here?"

"Have…to stop…Jake," I croaked, leaning into Esme's supporting arm as I sucked in air. Straightening up, I realized with horror that I was far too late.

On one side of the field stood the pack, fur bristling, with Sam at their head and the Cullens by their side. On the other stood Jane, Alec and Aro, hands folded in a parody of prayer as they calmly watched the proceedings playing out in front of them. In between the two were Caius and Jake, the russet haired wolf snarling as it circled its prey, the vampire as still as stone, completely certain of his victory. A scream bubbled up in my throat and I tamped down on it viciously, knowing it would only distract Jacob and give Caius the opening he would need to tear Jacob's throat out the same way he had Billy's.

Suddenly the wolf lunged and the vampire dodged, landing a glancing blow on his shoulder that sent him tumbling before dancing nimbly out of the way. He snarled, slinking lower to the ground, only to lunge and be knocked over again. Caius was playing with him, waiting for him tire before landing the death blow. Jake must have realized that because he suddenly froze, his eyes locked on Caius's cold, reptilian gaze.

The only sound I heard was the pounding of my heart over the silence that washed across the field as Jacob faced his father's killer. Caius smirked smugly, dodging to the right, then to the left. The wolf didn't move, staring straight ahead as if he was blind.

Oh god. It was Alec. Alec could cut off his senses. Jacob had no idea what was going on, and Caius was preparing to take advantage of that. They were cheating…but who would know? You certainly couldn't tell by looking at Alec's face, which was as clear and as smooth as glass, and if the frustration on Edward's face meant anything the group had once again been shielded from his mind reading. Jacob was going to die, and no one would ever know why. They'd just assume…

…that he'd gone out and picked a fight with the wrong vampire. Jazmine's words rang through my head, pounding like a gong. Wolves couldn't survive without their mates. Jacob thought I was going to become a vampire. He was standing in the middle of a field, completely cut off from his senses, facing down an enemy that would show him no quarter and no mercy, and he wasn't fighting back. He wasn't doing anything, and he was going to die, and if he died today I'd never be able to tell him I loved him.

Wait. I loved him?

Oh god, I did. I loved Jacob. A hundred different moments over the past few months passed through my head, and it dawned on me that I always had. What had started as a teenager's desperate need for her best friend had evolved into a sweet memory, then something deeper, something that had lain dormant in his absence and was now blooming, thriving under the love and care he'd showered on me since he walked back into my life. Suddenly it didn't matter that we might be bonded on some mystical, supernatural level that I couldn't begin to understand. It didn't matter that he'd left. It didn't even matter that I was supposed to be married in a few months.

Married. Edward. What was I going to do about Edward? I realized in a rush that as much as I loved Edward, I had come too far to accept the future he was offering. A part of me would always love him; he had been my first love, my first real kiss, my first real heartbreak. But it was like Andy had said, that love eventually burned itself out. I had loved Edward with all the fierceness and intensity of a child, but it was Jacob I had grown to love as a woman loves a man. A whole new future filled with possibilities was laid out in front of me with that shocking revelation. I just had to keep him alive long enough to share it with him.

Caius was still toying with Jacob out in the middle of that field, but I could tell he was growing weary of the game. The clock was ticking, and Jacob still hadn't moved. I had to let someone know what was going on…but who?

Then it didn't matter anymore. A blur of black, a helpless yelp, and the russet wolf lay on the ground as Caius reared back and sank his teeth deeply into the scruff of his neck.


	38. Chapter 38

Someone was screaming, mindlessly, endlessly, a piercing wail that, blended with the pounding of my heart and the blood rushing through my ears, seemed incredibly loud against the stillness that lay like a shroud over the field. It took a moment to realize that the horrible sound was coming from me, and that I was fighting against the hard band of Esme's arms as I struggled to get to the still body lying in the grass. For a brief, shining moment I had held all I ever wanted in the palm of my hand, only to have it ripped away in the same breath by the vampire now standing over Jacob's motionless corpse, his blood smeared in a grotesque parody of a smile across his face as it dripped obscenely onto the unrelieved black of his shirt.

I was so absorbed in the drama playing out in the center ring that I missed the blur of movement in my peripheral vision. A moment later the earth shook with the force of Emmett's body driving Alec into the ground.

"You bastard!" His fist made a satisfying "thwack" as it connected with Alec's face. "Couldn't stand the idea of a fair fight, could you? You just had to interfere. Or did the two of you plan this all along?"

It only took a second for everyone in the crowd to realize what he was talking about. The wolves tore forward as if shot from a cannon, Jane's powers dropping them here and there but unable to stop the hoard closing in on her. A moment later Paul's powerful jaws closed around her neck, and I closed my eyes as body parts started to fly. Next to her, Sam, Jared and Quil surrounded Aro, holding him hostage, lips pulled back and blood in their eyes as they circled in, stalking him like the deadly predators it was so easy to forget that they were.

The Volturi had killed one of their own, and through fair means or foul the pack was going to take their pound of flesh.

Caius had been forgotten in Emmett's rush on Alec, whom he and Jasper were now happily pummeling into oblivion like a pair of cats toying with a mouse, death a merciful end he was to be denied for just a little bit longer. That was almost a fatal mistake; when it became clear that the wolves had the upper hand, even without the assistance of the Cullens, who silently stood on the edge of the grass watching the scene unfolding before them, Caius lunged to Aro's defense…

…only to fall to the ground a moment later, sharp, canid teeth locked around his ankle as the russet wolf struggled to his feet. With Alec out of the picture Jacob's senses had been restored, and now that he had Caius firmly in his sights he was determined to finish what he'd started.

"Holy shit."

I wasn't sure who'd said it, but I agreed wholeheartedly. For the wolves, vampire venom held the promise of a slow, painful death, and enough time had elapsed from the moment Caius bit him to now that his heart, pounding with adrenaline and his own supernatural metabolism, had had plenty of time to pump it through his system. By all rights he should have been in too much pain to think, much less continue to hunt, yet here he was, on all fours (however unsteady those fours might be), shaking the vampire from side to side like some kind of unnatural chew toy.

That Edward simply appeared next to Jacob shouldn't have come as a surprise, not after everything else I had witnessed that day. That he calmly proceeded to catch Caius by the head and snap his neck, sending the offending appendage rolling, was slightly more shocking. In moments the men I loved had reduced Billy's murderer to so much rubble.

Then there was one.

Aro stood, silent and proud, surrounded now by a snarling, slavering wall of wolves, with no escape in sight and what was left of his army scattered across the dewy grass. Jacob stared at him for a moment, his eyes unreadable, then started moving forward in a painful parody of his usually smooth gait. His legs were stiff, his steps staggering, and every two or three feet he would collapse to the ground, his knees quaking as the venom slowly but surely ate away at his nervous system. Still he continued, baring his teeth and snapping at Edward when he reached out a hand to help hold him up.

It was at once the most monstrously painful and awe inspiring thing I've ever seen, the dying wolf dragging himself across the grass, the vampire walking tall and silent by his side, the pack parting like water to allow the crumbling ghost of their friend one last moment in the sun. Esme squeezed me gently, and I was surprised to realize I was still standing in her arms. Beside her Rosalie and Alice stood, silent and watchful.

Jazmine and Carlisle were conspicuously absent, but the observation flitted in and out of my mind as Aro started to speak.

"Edward…"

The wolf next to him growled a warning, and a ghost of a smile flickered across Edward's lips.

"I don't think he's inclined to listen to what you have to say Aro, and this battle isn't mine. I'm simply here as spokesperson for the pack. They're willing to allow you to live as long as you return to Volterra. Share the memory of this day, and your dishonor at the hands of your knights, with your followers, and never set foot on this soil again."

"I see." Aro's eyes flickered craftily to the Cullen women. "And do you speak for your family as well?"

The wolves snarled at that. Edward held his hands out, palms up, as if to say, 'What can I do?'

"It would appear the decision has already been made. I can say, however, that the man that was killed on the beach to begin this war was both family and friend to me and mine, as is the wolf standing next to me. Given that, it seems unlikely that Carlisle would disagree."

The Italian vampire pursed his lips in thought, staring out across the field to where I stood, then allowing his gaze to slip past the wolves (a bit wistfully, I thought), before turning back to Edward.

"Agreed."

Jacob whined, wobbling heavily on unsteady paws, and Edward looked down in surprise.

"I hardly think…"

The wolf whined again. Edward sighed.

"Bella."

Eyebrows lifted, Aro looked at him in surprise.

"The lovely Isabella?"

"It seems that my friend here has placed another condition on your life. Bella remains free to be who and what she chooses to be, whether she decides to embrace the transformation today, tomorrow, a hundred years from now or…," he paused, swallowing heavily, "not at all."

"Now Edward," the vampire said placatingly, "you know we cannot allow that. She knows far too much about us…and if memory serves, our young friend was eager to embrace immortality."

Jacob snarled, stepping forward on stiff legs. Aro looked down at him condescendingly.

"I hardly think you're in any position to enforce anything, pup. The venom burning its way through your system will see to that soon enough."

"He may not be, but the rest of his pack is…and as alpha, his wishes are theirs." Edward's voice was calm as he signed Aro's death warrant. "The choice is yours."

For a moment it looked like Aro was going to protest. His eyes flashed bitterly before landing on Jacob, and I really thought he was going to run for it. A part of me was hoping he would. The man…wolf…whatever I loved was a walking dead man at this point, the seconds of his life ticking away, his fate sealed by the fangs Caius had sunk into his flesh. A viciously vengeful streak I hadn't even known I had tap danced in delight at the thought of watching Sam and the pack rip him apart.

"Done," he said finally, acknowledging his defeat. At his words the pack stepped back and, just that fast, it was over. Esme let me go as Aro disappeared into the horizon and I ran, stumbling and falling, toward Jacob…only to have Edward catch me before I was halfway there.

"Bella…Bella, don't."

"Jake!" I stared into Edward's eyes, begging him to understand. His own face was soft with sadness and a sense of loss I hadn't expected to see. If anything, I'd have expected him to be gleeful over Jacob's death-but then, hadn't Edward always shown an incredible amount of restraint when it came to Jake, knowing what he meant to me?

"It's too dangerous, Bella." I started to argue, only to stop when he gave me a gentle shake. "The venom's consumed his mind, love. He's like a rabid animal right now. He doesn't know you. He doesn't know himself. He'll hurt you without meaning to if you get too close."

Turning my head I realized that the auburn wolf had finally collapsed, his body convulsing as it fought against the chemicals racing through his bloodstream. His eyes were glazed as he thrashed, mindless, in the grass, consumed by the agony wracking his body. Edward was right. Jacob wouldn't know me, and being the weak, puny human that I was his strength would tear me to pieces without an ounce of malicious intent behind it.

For a second, just one pain-filled second, I thought it might actually be worth it.

"You still love him."

Oh, I so did NOT want to have this conversation right now. Looking up into Edward's eyes, I realized it was unavoidable. He was looking down at me, his own pain and a strange kind of acceptance shining out of those amber globes. For just a second I was 18 year old Bella again, huddled in my tent against the bitter cold, the heat of Jacob's mouth still burning my lips as Edward looked at me with that same knowledge in his eyes.

"Yes, I do."

"Not that long ago, you would have promised me you loved me more."

I winced.

"Do we have to do this right now?" I asked pleadingly.

"Yes, I really think we do." He searched my face for a moment, such sadness in his expression that I felt my own heart breaking. Then he reached down and lifted my hand, staring at the ring still sitting on my finger.

"This doesn't belong here anymore, does it?"

"No." Jacob was dying. The least I could do in his last moments was give him truth, even if he never knew. "I love you, Edward, I do…but I'm not that girl anymore. Even if Jacob…_when_ Jacob dies, I'm still never going to be that girl again."

He sighed, gently tugging the ring off and slipping it into his pocket.

"I suppose I always knew this was coming," he mused, smiling down at me.

"Edward…"

"No, not like that." He laughed lightly. "I would have done my best to make you happy for eternity. You would have been my Bella Noche, my beautiful night, followed by an eternity of beautiful mornings. But when Alice lost your future while you were in Florida and called me to let me know…it wasn't just your time in Jacksonville she couldn't see. I believe the decision was made the moment Jacob Black walked back into your life. I knew it when I saw him standing at Renee's fence. You just hadn't seen it yet."

"I…" Wait a second. "I thought you saw him when we were in the living room? After dinner?"

"Do you truly believe that I would leave you alone and vulnerable, knowing the Volturi might be lurking nearby?" He looked at me disapprovingly. "I would never take such a chance."

"Alice's car." I didn't know how I'd missed it. "That's why you were driving Alice's car instead of a rental. You'd already driven down after me."

"I know you're angry we kept this from you, Bella, but I swear to you that your life was never at risk. And whatever else may have happened, I think I always knew Jacob would protect you if I couldn't."

He pressed his lips to my forehead in a gentle farewell, and I couldn't miss the irony of his words. He was leaving, and Jacob was dying. There was no one to protect me now.


	39. Chapter 39

I don't know how long Edward and I had been standing there, his lips pressed to my forehead as silent tears dripped down my cheeks, but gradually the sound of voices arguing reached my ears.

"He's been through enough, bloodsucker. The least you could do is let him die in peace."

Paul's voice was harsh and bitter, and almost against my will I turned my head to see who "he" was. No, Jacob was still the only one dying-only he wasn't alone. As if she had appeared out of nowhere Jaz crouched on the ground next to his still convulsing body, filling the biggest needle I've ever seen in my life from a clear vial while Carlisle held the wolves back.

"I could let him die in peace, or one of you could come over here and hold him down for me so he doesn't have to die at all," she snapped, the crisp professionalism in her voice taking the wolves by surprise.

"What are you doing?"

Sam was either a dreamer or an eternal optimist. Either way, he obligingly came and crouched next to Jacob, using all his weight to hold him to the ground as Jaz slid the hypodermic into the space between his ribs.

"Vampire anti-venom."

The glee in her voice took a second to register, but when it did my heart hit my throat. Without thinking twice I ducked away from Edward and ran to crouch next to her on the grass.

"Are you kidding? Where in the hell did you get vampire anti-venom?"

Jaz looked up at Carlisle, hero worship gleaming in her eyes.

"After your…run-in with James it seemed prudent, especially in light of your decision to remain human, to be sure we had an adequate method of treatment should you be bitten again." Carlisle glanced down at Jacob, who had finally stopped convulsing. "Young Jacob is extremely lucky we were able to put together a batch of werewolf strength serum in time."

"You _knew_ he was going to get bitten?"

"Nobody knew anything, but when you're going up against the biggest, baddest, nastiest vamps in town it's always good to be prepared." Jacob whined and Jaz reached over, stroking his coat reassuringly. "I know sweetie, that hurts. I promise, I'll knock you out soon, but it needs a few more minutes to work first."

She glanced over at me and smiled.

"It's all right. He's back with us. You can touch him. Just be gentle-he's going to be pretty sore for a while."

Tentatively I stretched out a hand, terrified of hurting him again, but when my fingers gently stroked the fur covering his ribs he relaxed instantly, melting into the ground with a soft chuff of satisfaction. We sat there just like that for a few minutes longer, until Jaz decided the anti-venom had had time to kick in and it was safe to put him to sleep.

A light touch of the hand, a few murmured words, and the wolf melted into human form, blissfully unconscious. I heard a collective "whoosh" as the pack gathered around us sucked in their breath, but at that moment I couldn't see anything but the beautiful rise and fall of Jacob's chest. He was going to live.

Sam came over with a pair of shorts in hand, quickly covering Jacob up and carrying him off after Carlisle assured them he'd stop by to check on him later. Blinking back tears of sheer, stupefied relief I started to follow them, only to be stopped by Jaz's hand on my arm.

"He's going to be out for a while. It's going to take some time for the drugs to work their way through his system." She nodded to the wolves behind her. "In the meantime, your friend Jane took a pretty good piece out of these guys. We could use some help getting everyone patched up."

My heart was screaming at me, but I knew she was right. He needed the rest. There would be plenty of time to talk later. Thanks to Jake, I had all the time in the world.

The next few hours passed quickly, a hazy blur of broken bones, dislocated shoulders and deep scratches that were knitting before my eyes, set against a backdrop of putrid smoke as the Cullens burned what was left of the Volturi. I was tying a sling around Embry's neck when Esme walked over, her dark hair disheveled, her eyes full of warmth.

"I've got a new recipe for empanadas I'm dying to try out," she said casually, helping me clean up the bloody bandages and medical supplies Carlisle had brought as though she did it every day. It was amazing how easy it seemed to be for her to be around the wolves' blood when she'd had so much trouble with mine. "I know you're going to want to go see Jacob tonight, but we'd really like to have you over tomorrow if you could."

Oh boy. With all of the rest of the drama going on that afternoon, Esme didn't know I'd broken up with Edward. How was I going to tell her? Nausea reared its ugly head as I realized what my realization was going to cost me. I certainly wasn't going to be welcome at the Cullens' when they found out I'd dumped Edward for Jacob.

"Ummm…sure?"

I smiled weakly, figuring there would be plenty of time later for Edward to fill her in on what had happened between the two of us. It was chicken hearted, I know, but…I wasn't ready to give up her love just yet.

"Excellent." She reached around me to scoop up the rest of the mess and toss it into a bag. "I'll take care of burning the rest of this. You go ahead and get out of here. I imagine young Jacob's eager to see you."

I took her words at face value until I looked at the knowing look on her face. Frozen, all I could do was stare at her. Heat crawled up my cheeks. She couldn't possibly mean…she couldn't know…it was just a phrase, that's all. Right?

Esme smiled at my distress, reaching into the pocket of her somehow still stunning dress. Pulling out her hand, she laid it flat. In the center of her palm rested the ring Edward had given me the day I'd promised to marry him.

"He told us. He also said you'd probably feel weird about coming around for a while, but Bella…" she reached out, wrapping me up in a hug, "…I want you to know that I'll always think of you as a daughter, even if you don't marry my son. I'll always be grateful for the happiness you've given him, and it's important that you know you're always welcome in our home. Jacob too, as soon as he's ready."

Speechless, I wrapped my arms around her and held on. She knew. She knew, and she understood, and she loved me anyway. Glancing over her shoulder, I saw Emmett giving me a lewd wink and a thumbs up. Jasper and Alice were beaming, their arms wrapped around each other. Even Rosalie was smiling.

"You're choosing right this time," she mouthed.

My eyes filled with tears as I looked at my family. My family, whether I married Edward or not.

"I love you guys," I whispered, squeezing Esme fiercely one more time before stepping back. She beamed, wiping the tears from my face.

"We love you too. Now get moving. I think that young man's waited long enough, don't you?"

As I walked off the field and into the woods, a slow smile crawled across my face. Jacob was alive. The Volturi were gone. I wasn't going to become a vampire. My family still loved me. And I was desperately in love. It was a beautiful day. Now all I had to do was find Jacob and hope I wasn't too late to ask him what he was doing for the rest of his life.


	40. Chapter 40

I was running by the time I got to Billy's…no, not Billy's anymore. The thought slowed my steps. Jake had been through so much the last couple of days. Should I really be here? Or was this just another example of Bella being selfish again? With the blinders pulled away it was impossible to miss how many times I had put my own needs ahead of my best friend. Maybe I should give him some time…

The door came into view, and I couldn't help the tug at the corner of my lips. Maybe not. This time, I was the one that couldn't wait. I tore up the steps, bursting through the entrance into the living room and jogging on autopilot back to Jacob's old room. I don't know how I knew I'd find him there instead of in Billy's master bedroom, but somehow I did. Skidding to a stop in his doorway, I just stood there and drank him in.

His eyes were closed, his breathing slightly labored. You could tell from the pallor under his skin and the way his hands would occasionally clench convulsively on the bed sheets that he was still hurting, but he was alive. I'd once thought that nothing could hurt as badly as losing Edward, but I'd relearned what pain and fear meant when I saw him collapse under Caius's eager teeth. We could deal with anything else.

Then his eyes popped open and all my warm, fuzzy feelings faded away. They were black with fury and disgust, staring at me like I was a piece of gum he'd found on the bottom of his shoe.

"Somehow I knew you'd be along," he said sardonically. "Nothing like being stuck in a goddamned episode of Groundhog Day." When I didn't say anything he sneered. "Come on Bella, this is your cue. What are you waiting for?"

"I don't…I don't know what you want me to say."

He rolled his eyes.

"Come on Bells, you shouldn't even need a script for this anymore. You say, "Jeez Jake, I'm sorry you were hurt. Are you okay?" Then I look at you like you're stupid, because, well, a fucking vampire just _bit_ me and if it wasn't for Carlisle's wacky science experiments I'd be a dead man right now. Then you say, "Jake, I'm glad you're going to be okay," possibly followed by "I love you, but I'm not in love with you, and I'm sorry it hurts you but I'm going to run off and marry Edward even though you just risked your life standing up to the stupid Italian leech with the bad hair so I wouldn't have to turn into a vampire. But I hope we can still be friends." Then I say sure, you give me a hug and then you run out of here like your tail was on fire…if you had a tail. But then, I guess that's supposed to be my line. But oh, wait, I'm stuck in this stupid bed because _a fucking vampire just bit me!_"

The blood had slowly drained out of my face at Jacob's diatribe, not only because of his harsh words but because I knew exactly where the emotions driving them were coming from. In his mind we were playing out that horrible scene all over again, the one where I came to him after he was hurt fighting the newborns, after realizing I loved him, _after sealing his freaking mate bond,_ only to tell him that I didn't love him enough to stay. This was a bad idea. I should just…

"Leaving so soon, Bells?" he jeered. "But you just got here."

Stopping with my hand on the side of the door frame, I glanced over my shoulder to look him in the eyes. They were still dark, bitter with anger, but there was a deep, bleeding hurt in them that told me if I walked out on him this time he might not recover. This time, Jacob needed me to be the strong one, because he couldn't fight for me anymore. For once, Jake needed me to be willing to fight for him instead of letting his anger and my own confused loyalties drive me away.

The problem was, I didn't have any confused loyalties, and we were all grown up now. The time when his bitterness over what had happened between me and Edward could send me flying back to Edward's arms was long gone. I'd burned that bridge when I gave Edward back his ring. Which meant that I needed to be willing to step up to bat if I wanted Jake in my life.

"I'm sorry Mr. Black." I gave an exaggerated sigh, turning around and walking back into the room to perch on the side of the bed. "I find your script to be trite, repetitious and completely lacking in character depth. All things considered, I think it'd flop at the box office."

Jake watched me warily, caution and uncertainty slowly nudging the anger out of his eyes.

"What are you talking about Bells?"

If there ever was a moment when it would be driven home to me just how much damage my selfishness and immaturity had done to this amazing man over the years, this was it, as I sat on the side of his bed trying to find the words to let him know I loved him and watching the look on his face shift from anger to fear without once stopping to consider that this might finally be our chance for a happy ending. I had to do this right, or it was all going to blow up in my face.

"It means you've got your cues wrong. This is the part where the bratty, sarcastic werewolf shuts the hell up and stops making assumptions and maybe, just maybe, his stupid, ignorant, clueless and previously blind best friend can rewrite the ending to one he deserves."

Unable to help myself, I reached out and lightly traced the hollows of his cheeks and chin. He turned his head into my hand (I don't think he even knew he'd done it) and my heart melted at the tickle of his soft lips on my palm. He thought I was going to break his heart all over again, and yet he was still soaking up the crumbs of affection I tossed his way because he thought that was all he'd ever get. I really didn't deserve him.

"Jake, I love you."The words burst out, only to freeze when his eyes blackened with fury.

"Where have I heard that before?" he said dryly. "That last movie was great. Too bad they never made a sequel. Hate to tell ya Bells, but your originality sucks."

"Then let me try it again." Bending down, I pressed a light kiss into the hollow of his shoulder, exactly as I'd wanted to do all those years ago. "I'm not going to turn into a vampire, and I'm not going to marry Edward." I watched his eyes grow huge as I hurried on. "I'm not going to apologize for the time I spent with Edward, because I needed that time to grow up and find out what love really meant, so that I could sit here today and look you in the eye and tell you that I love you. That I'm _in_ love with you. And that I'm going to do whatever it takes to make you believe me."

The room was so silent you could have heard a pin drop. Jacob's eyes were unfathomable as they stared into mine, their chocolate covered depths so different from Edward's, the heat from his body blazing like a furnace as it warmed me to my toes. As the seconds ticked by, my heart sank lower in my chest. It was too late. I'd waited too long. Somehow, in those moments when he'd thought he was going to die, Jake had managed to let me go. It was only what I deserved, of course, but that didn't make it any easier.

"Well, I guess that's my answer to that." Stiffly, I started to stand up. "I'll call Carlisle and tell him you're awake so he can come by and check on you. He…"

A warm, heavily muscled arm shot out of the blankets, the hand clamping around my wrist and tethering me in place.

"Say it again," he rasped.

My brow furrowed in confusion.

"I said I'd call Carlisle and tell him…"

"No, not that part. The other part."

Jacob was looking at me with torment in his eyes, and my heart melted as I realized what he wanted. I stepped back over to the bed, falling to my knees on the floor so that my eyes were level with his.

"I said I'm in love with you," I said slowly, never letting go of his gaze. "I think I have been all along, I just had some growing up to do before I could be what you needed. I'll never deserve you, but if you'll give me another chance I swear I'll do anything, _anything _to prove it to you."

Soft fingers traced over my face the same way mine had traced over his just moments before, and I felt the tears as they started to fall.

"Please Jake," I whispered, closing my eyes and leaning my head into his hand the way I had in the garage. "Please. I know I've hurt you, over and over again, and that I'll probably hurt you again, even if I don't really mean to, but I _swear_ to you that I'm going to do everything I can to be the kind of person you deserve. Please."

He reached up with his other hand to cradle my head in his palms as the tears raced down my cheeks.

"Why are you begging, Bella? You know I'm not going anywhere. You don't have to…"

"Yes, I do." I gave him a watery smile. "You haven't decided if you're going to forgive me yet, and I can't live without you. I love you, Jake. And it's so big, and so powerful, I feel like it's going to swallow me whole if I can't share it with you. I need you to forgive me so I can have the chance."

Of all the things he could have done right then, from telling me to walk out of his room and let him get on with his life to confessing that he still loved me too and was going to give me the chance to try and undo some of the damage I'd caused over the years, Jacob then proceeded to do the most idiotic one I could think of. He tried to sit up.

"Oh God," he moaned, sliding off the bed onto the floor next to me, then leaning his head against the frame as his skin turned green, then ashy gray. "I think that stupid leech flambéd my guts."

"What are you doing? Get back in bed!" I was pretty sure I was screeching, but really, when someone almost _dies_ you'd think they'd have the basic intelligence to, oh, I don't know, _not move_ for a while. And no matter how much he loved me, I was pretty sure Carlisle was going to kill me if I made Jake hurt himself even worse.

Metaphorically speaking, of course.

"Can't." He worked up a smirk, but I could tell it was costing him. "Can't tell you you're being stupid when I'm flat on my back."

His head tipped to the side so he could look at me, and his face suddenly became serious, with a hint of something hiding behind his eyes that took my breath away.

"You've never had to beg me for anything Bella. I love you. You know that. I told you once I'd take you any way I could get you. But I need to know you mean it. I need to know it's enough this time, because if I let myself believe, even for a second, that you actually still love me, and you left me again…"

His face contorted painfully, and I couldn't help myself. Even though I knew it would hurt him worse than he was already hurting I reached out, wrapping my arms around his neck and leaning forward to lay my cheek against his.

"Never." I turned my head to kiss him, something warm unfurling in my belly when he immediately wrapped his arms around me, toppling me over into his lap and kissing me back with desperate fervor, as if he was afraid he was going to wake up and find out it was all just a dream. "I'm never leaving you again. You're stuck with me, whether you want me or not."

Somehow, even through the pain he couldn't quite hide and the emotion that had tears swimming in both our eyes, he managed an affectionate leer.

"That ought to make for an interesting shower."


	41. Chapter 41

The soft strains of Train filled the banquet room, and I smiled weakly as yet another graduating senior came by and hugged me, gushing about how fast it had all gone by. I don't know why I came to the stupid Graduation Ball, except that I still had that awesome dress Alice had bought me and it seemed a shame to let it go to waste. Even though I was there with Jaz and Max, I couldn't help but think this whole deal would be a lot more fun if Jake were there.

Unfortunately, "never" turned out to be about 3 more days, during which he'd had so many people around him I barely got to see him. I still had a few months left of school (which I felt_ really_ guilty about, since Edward had been footing the bill) and spring break was almost over. So was Andy's, so even though he wasn't completely recovered Jake had insisted on getting on a plane and heading back to Jacksonville.

"I wish you didn't have to go," he'd said wistfully, his arms wrapped around me as we stood in the terminal waiting for our flights to be called. "I finally get the leech out of the picture and I don't even get to enjoy it."

"He's not a leech." I leaned my head against his chest, chuckling as I saw Jaz and Quil horsing around next to the gate. Andy was leaning against Embry's chest, her head tilted back, eyes closed as Embry whispered something in her ear that brought a dreamy tilt to her lips. Somehow, I didn't think I wanted to know. "I'll try and come down to Renee's after graduation."

His grip had tightened painfully.

"We probably aren't going to make it up for graduation. Another set of plane tickets is going to kill my budget."

There had been so much regret in his eyes that I couldn't help standing on tiptoe to plant a light kiss on his lips.

"It's no big deal. It's just a stupid ceremony."

"I know, but it's a pretty big one. And then you're only going to have a couple of weeks before you have to be in Illinois."

Ouch. I'd forgotten about that. Well, hadn't really forgotten. It was more of a 'trying not to think about it' sort of thing. One of the schools I had interviewed with had called me just the day before to offer me a job, and now that I wasn't going to marry Edward I couldn't afford to say no. Carlisle had, of course, tactfully offered to lend me the money to tide me over if I wanted to turn them down and head down to Florida, since I was likely to be looking at a year of subbing before I found anything permanent. I had turned him down flat. No, they probably wouldn't have missed the money, but if Jake and I were going to have any kind of future I needed to stand on my own two feet.

Carlisle had understood, I think, because he'd simply wrapped me in a hug and wished me luck. He hadn't, however, accepted any arguments when he said they were signing my beloved car over to me as a graduation present. Of course, I hadn't given him too many. There was independent, then there was just plain stupid.

Jacob had been glad I hadn't taken the money, but it was going to mean a year apart while I got things worked out and looked for a job down in Jacksonville.

"Hey, we waited this long, right?" I gave him a brave, if slightly wobbly smile. "What's one more year in the grand scheme of things?"

The look on his face said he was thinking the exact same thing I was-that a year could be a really freaking long time when it seemed like you'd already been waiting forever.

"Hello Bella."

A smooth, familiar voice cut into my thoughts, dragging me back to the present.

"Hello Edward."

It was the first time I'd seen Edward since we'd broken things off, and I was miserably uncomfortable. He, however, seemed perfectly at ease.

"May I have this dance?"

He held his arm out to me with a courtly bow, and I couldn't help but smile as I slipped my arm through it and let him lead me out on to the dance floor. Some things never changed. There was an earnest glow in his amber eyes as he looked at me, warmth and memories dancing with new loss as he held me at a careful distance, swaying lightly to the ballad crooning out of the DJ's speakers.

"You look lovely tonight."

"You too."

It was true. Whatever else you could or couldn't say about Edward, he cleaned up nice. The fabric of the tux was crisp under my fingers, the midnight blue bringing out the pale perfection of his skin. A soft tugging on my heart strings reminded me of what this man had once meant to me, and I couldn't help but sigh.

"I've missed you."

I flinched. I'd been staying with Jaz and Max since we got back from Forks. Jaz knew everything, and was thrilled to help me turn the living room of their suite into my own little bedroom. Max…well, she didn't know everything, but she'd welcomed me with open arms. I hadn't been able to deal with the thought of staying alone in the apartment I'd shared with Edward, although he had offered (by way of Alice) to make himself scarce so I didn't have to move. I guess he wasn't enjoying it any more than I would have.

"Edward…"

"No, it's okay Bella. I know it's over. I can't even say I resent the fact. You know all I've ever wanted for you to be…happy." I knew he meant human. "I just…I hope you won't cut me out of your life entirely. I would like, very much, for us to be friends."

There was no doubt he meant it, not when his expression all but screamed that he was telling the truth, and I couldn't help but smile.

"I'd like that."

You could have lit the entire building with the glow on his face. Then he looked over my shoulder, and his smile somehow got even brighter.

"I have a surprise for you."

"Oh man," I grumbled good-naturedly, rolling my eyes as he gently turned me around to face the refreshment table. "You know how much I hate…"

My voice trailed off, shocked into nothingness as I stared at the group standing there, set against the silver and blue streamers and decorations that had transformed the room into Dartmouth's own starry night. There were Emmett and Rosalie, walking hand in hand over to the dance floor, and Andy and Embry, arguing over something in a warming dish as they stood there, plates in hand. There were Alice and Jasper, chatting brightly with Max, and Jaz and Quil, laughing over some nonsense or other, and next to Quil…

Blood pounded in my ears as I met Jake's bright brown eyes over the top of his cup of punch. He looked amazing, decked out in a crisp black tux, drawing envious gazes from the other women in the room. Edward, who was standing behind me with his hands on my shoulders, leaned forward to lightly graze my cheek with his lips.

"Be happy, Bella."

"Thank you Edward." I was whispering, but I knew he'd heard me. His fingers squeezed lightly, just once, before nudging me toward my destiny.

The rest of the night was pure bliss, the details simultaneously burned into my mind and blurred with the pleasure of having Jake there. I discovered that when I was with Jake my two left feet were actually willing to follow the beat, and we spent hours dancing under the fake silver stars someone had hung from the ceiling. Emmett, Embry and Quil each grabbed me for a spin around the dance floor, and even Jasper had pulled me in for a quick jitterbug.

Who would have guessed that I, Bella Swan, klutz extraordinaire, would actually know how to jitterbug? It defied imagination. I guess I picked up more living with Edward that I'd thought.

Each slow song found me happily tucked back in Jacob's arms, however, my cheek pressed to his shoulder, his lips soft on my hair. It was during one of these moments that Jake carefully steered me off the dance floor and out a side door into the cool night air.

I laughed as he lightly twirled me around, staggering back just a bit on my high heels when he let me go. He smiled slightly, then stuffed his hands in his pants pockets, turning away from me and taking a few steps into the night. The happiness that had all but resonated in his eyes most of the night was gone, replaced by the cool, remote stranger I'd seen that day in Renee's backyard. A chill ran down my back, freezing me to the bone.

"Jake? What's going on?"

He didn't answer me for a minute, and I couldn't help but wonder if this was it. Had he come all the way to New Hampshire just to tell me he didn't want to be with me anymore? That this long distance relationship was more trouble than it was worth? He wouldn't have…would he?

Then he turned around and pulled his hands out of his pockets, his face cast into sharp relief by the light of the parking lot. My gaze immediately zeroed in on the small jeweler's box he held by his side. Without saying a word, he held it out to me.

"Jacob…" I reached out with trembling fingers, my thoughts drawn to the newly bare skin on my left ring finger where Edward's ring had sat for so many years. Maybe it wasn't a ring. I found myself fervently hoping that it was earrings, or another bracelet, or something, anything other than the band of platinum and diamond I saw when I opened the lid.

"Oh God…" Oh boy. How do you tell the man you love that you can't marry him without breaking his heart? It wasn't that I didn't want to marry Jake. I did. At least, I thought I did. One day. But it was way too soon to start planning the wedding. Then I got a good look at the ring, and my words died on my lips.

I _knew_ this ring. Angela and I had found it one day in a jewelry store in Port Angeles. We'd both fallen instantly in love, making the jeweler take it out and let us try it on over, and over, and over again. That had been almost 6 years ago, but the odds of Jake just happening to buy the exact same ring…there was no way this was a coincidence.

"Jake, how long have you had this ring?"

Jacob laughed, reaching up to brush a strand of hair behind my cheek and trailing his fingers down my neck.

"That's been sitting in my sock drawer since I was 16." His eyes were warm on mine. "I spent every penny I had saved that year to buy that right before…before Alice came back, and the two of you took off to Italy."

"You were going to ask me to _marry_ you?" I squeaked.

"Not then, but I thought…you know, someday." Those broad shoulders shrugged uncomfortably. "Then the leech…sorry, _Edward_…came back, and I knew it wasn't going to happen. I've almost thrown this thing off a cliff a hundred times, but somehow, I just couldn't do it."

He lifted the box out of my hands, taking it out and slipping it onto my finger.

"I'm not asking you to marry me today, or tomorrow, or even this year," he said softly. "I know it's too soon for that. I just need to know that you want it, and me, and everything it stands for. I need to know that someday I'm going to get to see that ring on your finger and know that you're mine."

Tears filled my eyes as I threw my arms around his neck, the band gleaming in the artificial light. The sound of applause reached my ears and we pulled apart, looking behind us to the doorway of the gym where all of our friends had crowded, clapping and whistling appreciatively. Even Edward was smiling.

'Oh yes,' I thought, slipping back into Jake's arms to lift my face for his kiss. 'It really was a beautiful day.'


	42. Epilogue

It was a perfect day for a wedding. The sun shone down on the white rosettes Alice, Emily and Kim had spent hours tying to the chairs, dancing across the bubbling fountain of champagne and glistening on the gazebo Charlie, Emmett, Embry and Quil had built for the occasion. The crimson runner connecting the back stoop to the stairs the bride and groom would stand on to say their "I do's" was in place. The guests were standing around chatting aimlessly while the children chased each other through the grass.

In front of the gazebo the groom stood, tall and proud in the tuxedo we'd begged, badgered and bribed him into wearing, laughing and smiling as he horsed around with his friends. Inside the small house, the bride…

The bride was going to throw up.

"This is a horrible idea. Did you see all the people out there? I'm going to trip, and I'm going to fall on my face, and they're going to laugh at me. Is it too late to just ditch out and catch the next flight to Vegas?"

"I'm pretty sure Emily and Alice would come up with new and creative ways to kill you if you run out on this wedding."

I reached out, gently straightening the headpiece holding the veil in place, tucking the comb deeper into the thick blond ponytail.

"Besides, what are you worried about? You and Embry have been living in sin forever. You're just finally making it legal. And you know Embry would hamstring anyone who even _thought_ about laughing at you today, even if you did fall flat on your face. You're going to be fine."

Andy looked up at me, gratitude shining out of her eyes.

"I'm starting to think you and Jake had the right idea. All we wanted was our family here. I think I saw all of the reservation and ¾ of Forks out there the last time I looked!"

There was nothing I could say to argue with that. Esme, Emily and Alice had grabbed the reins on this wedding and rolled forward, steamrolling over poor Andy the way they had me not that long ago. Whatever I would have said was drowned out by a knock at the door.

"Oh crap, that better not be Embry!" Andy shot up from her seat at the kitchen table, hustling back to Jake's old bedroom. I laughed as I turned the knob, my smile widening when I found myself face to face with tall, dark and handsome himself.

"Hello, beautiful." Jake whistled appreciatively, letting his eyes run down the gorgeous rose dress Andy had picked out for her bridesmaids. "What are you doing for the rest of my life?"

"Cooking your dinner, doing your laundry, rubbing your back, changing your son's diapers…" I lifted my head for a quick peck on my carefully made-up lips. "Where is Billy, anyway?"

He rolled his eyes. "Where do you think?"

I had to laugh. Marriage to Jake had been wonderful-so wonderful, in fact, that neither one of us had been surprised when little William Charles Black had made his grand appearance a few months before our second anniversary. What had taken us both by surprise, however, was the way he'd summarily decided Rosalie was his favorite person. At eighteen months little Billy was a charmer, and he had the blond vampire wrapped around his little finger.

For her part, Rosalie adored the little boy. She and Emmett both doted on him, thriving in their role of honorary aunt and uncle. Jacob had worried until Rosalie wryly assured him that he had enough of his father's wolf blood in him to make him smell about as appetizing as a rotten fish. (She often joked that every time he pooped it was actually an improvement.)

The older he'd gotten, the more I'd appreciated Rosalie's helping hands. Apparently wolf genes ran strong in this generation, because all of the wolf children from Sam Jr. on down were displaying supernatural tendencies at a frighteningly early age. They could run farther, jump higher and shimmy up a refrigerator to get to the cookie jar on top faster than their oh-so-human mothers could even hope to keep up with.

Sam and Emily had eyed the vampires suspiciously when they first started watching Little Billy, but as Sam Jr. and his little brother Abram continued to grow they eventually started leaving them with Rosalie, Alice and Esme as well. Now the back wing of the Cullens' house served as a day care center of sorts for the pack when they needed a sitter, and the Cullen women thrived on the attention they were able to lavish on the kids.

Who would have thought vampire babysitters would turn out to be all the rage?

Carlisle and Sam had dissolved the boundary lines drawn by the treaty the summer after my graduation. While the immediate threat posed by the Volturi had been eliminated, the fact that Marcus and Aro still lived meant it was too dangerous for the Cullens to move where they would be without the protection of the pack, and vice versa. Instead, Carlisle had built a huge house on the outside edge of the reservation-and when I say huge, I mean _huge_. Rosalie and Emmett and Jasper and Alice each had their own wing, as did Edward, allowing them to stay close to their family.

Everyone had been surprised when Carlisle decided to go into private practice a few years ago, transforming the downstairs of their house into a clinic. The wolves loved it, since he knew exactly what they were, and the rest of Forks loved it because…well, because having to drive to the doctor was a pain and everyone knew just how good Doc Cullen actually was. Jaz and Max had both moved west after finishing med school to be closer to Jake, Billy and I, and Carlisle had brought Jaz on as a partner.

Max had bigger plans than a clinic in La Push. She was working as a pediatric hospitalist and doing research at some big hospital in Seattle. We'd had to fill her in on everything when she moved out, and she'd taken it with astonishing good grace.

"I always knew there was something weird about him," she grumbled in relation to Edward, but that was all she had said. She had also spent hours closeted in with Carlisle and Sam, learning the ins and outs of vampire and wolf anatomy. Carlisle had been known to pull a few strings a time or two to make sure his patients ended up with her, and in return she gave him an extra set of hands at clinics a couple times a year. It was an arrangement that worked for everyone.

Since they had decided to stay, the Cullens had fully integrated into Forks. Jasper and Alice both actively worked with the Forest Rangers, and we'd all laughed hysterically when Emmett went to work for Charlie at the police department. Edward traveled a lot, doing what, I wasn't quite sure, but he got along well enough with everyone when he was here. Rosalie and Esme were happy to stay home and play mother to the community of wolf cubs when their parents needed a break, and they'd taken care of Billy for me since I went back to work.

After my year of teaching was up in Illinois I'd spent two years in Jacksonville with Jacob, but when Andy graduated all of us had packed our bags and moved back to La Push. Quil, Embry and Jake were missing the pack, and since Andy was happy to be wherever Jake and Embry were Jake had sold the shop and opened up a new one in Forks. Andy kept their books and taught at the dance studio downtown, and I helped run the new school they'd set up on the reservation for our up and coming generation of wolves.

The existence of vampires and wolves was an open secret in Forks these days. Hard not to be, when the Quileute children were twice as fast as your average bear (literally) and the Cullens, who most of the town remembered from their early days, still looked like teenagers. Not everyone was happy about it, and there was still a certain amount of distrust in the air, but in the way of small towns the people of Forks had closed ranks around them, dodging questions and shrouding the mystery of their existence with secrecy and legends that did wonders for the tourist business.

And if a visitor happened to come to town and notice that Dr. Cullen looked a little younger than he should have, or that the town's mechanics were able to lift their cars without the help of a jack, well, that was all part of the charm.

Shortly after Jake and I had moved back an American writer by the name of Stephanie Meyer had come to town. She'd been enchanted with Forks, and had nagged Jake and I into telling her our story. We'd shrugged and complied-after all, there were so many crazy tales flying around Forks, what was one more, right? I was shocked when she actually published her books, even more so when I saw how much…creative license she'd taken with the end of our story.

Jake swore up and down he hadn't done anything to piss her off while she was in town, but I had to wonder. Hybrid babies and vampire armies, indeed. I'd been a little worried about how he'd take the fact that she'd turned me into a vampire and stuck Edward and I together for all eternity, since that had come a little closer to being the truth than either of us wanted to think about these days, but he'd just laughed.

"It's just a story, Bells," he'd said, then shuddered. "Although that whole 'imprinting on your hybrid vampire daughter' thing was pretty nasty. And deciding I didn't love you anymore, just because I imprinted? Yeah, never gonna happen."

I really didn't deserve him.

"Are you guys about ready?"

"You may need a crowbar to get the bride out of the back bedroom." I laughed up at him. "I think she's decided that after all the grief she gave us about getting married by a Justice of the Peace in Renee's back yard, eloping isn't such a bad idea after all."

Jake rolled his eyes, stepping past me to kick open the door to the back room. A second later he carried a laughing Andy out, arms wrapped around his neck, the train of her dress trailing on the floor.

"I think Embry might object to switching grooms," I pointed out, unable to help the grin on my face. After spending the past five years with the two of them it was hard to believe I'd ever been jealous. Jake was devoted to Andy, but he and I were the closest thing to parents she had and I had shed a tear or two today myself.

"Come on guys, we're late!"

I looked down into Alice's beaming face, then past her to Emily and Rachel, who were dressed in the same rose colored gowns I was. Behind them stood Jaz, her arm lightly looped through Quil's, who as Embry's best man was looking pretty good himself. Those two had developed an odd relationship over the years. She swore up and down that his wolf gave her a wide berth because of her role in the tribe, so nothing serious was ever going to happen, but she looked so sad about it I had to wonder.

Besides, if what I'd heard when I'd walked into the house earlier meant anything, while they might not be joined on the spiritual plane, on the physical plane they were doing just fine.

We lined up on Billy's back porch-no, not Billy's. Paul and Rachel's now. I stood beside a beaming Alice as Emily and Kim walked down the aisle, scattering rose petals as they went. Behind me, I heard Jake whisper something to Andy that made her laugh. He had agreed to give her away today, and it was a bittersweet moment for all of us.

Stepping down onto the runner I smiled at the crowd in front of me. Andy was right; both the entire reservation and the entire town of Forks had turned out to see her get married that day. There were the Cullens, sitting next to Phil and Renee, who was happily helping Rosalie entertain Billy. There were Angela and Ben, and Mike Newton, who looked like he was doing his best to flirt with Max, who in turn was doing her best to ignore him. Charlie beamed at me from his seat of honor next to Embry's mom.

I couldn't help the grin that split my face when I saw Leah sitting in the crowd next to Sue and Seth, hand-in-hand with her new fiancé. She'd taken Jaz up on her offer and headed south, where she'd happily imprinted on one of the young men in Jaz's tribe. She was a lot happier (and a LOT easier to live with) these days.

Stepping up onto the stairs of the gazebo I smiled as my husband walked his honorary baby sister down the aisle to the young man who was staring at her with the stunned disbelief of someone handed the sun and told he got to keep it. It looked like everyone had gotten their happy ending after all.

**Author's Note:Thanks so much to everyone who's read, reviewed and told me they were dying to find out what happens next. You guys are the bomb! I've started the sequel. It's titled "Here There Be Demons", in which Bella has a secret, Edward has a girlfriend, Embry's being a jerk, something evil is stalking the children of La Push, and Quil and Jaz see if they can't spin the wheel for their own happy ending. You'll find it under my profile. Hope to see you there!  
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**A/N (the first)-Awww! I feel like a proud parent, sending my children all grown up to make their way in the world. I hope you've enjoyed, although I have to say…something's telling me that even though this story is complete, it's far from over. The Volturi are still out there, and Jaz and Max's stories are starting to nag at the back of my brain, waiting to be told. What do you think? Would you be interested in seeing what happens to Bella's best friends as they find their own soulmates? And hearing what happens to Bella and Jake after "And they lived happily ever after?" **


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